Skip to content Dominion and Marriage Oct 14 · 45 min ...more
October 14, 2022 · 45 min · Sex & Marriage
...more Show the full description Show less Support this leader Liking this video? Support this ministry.
Support this leader
Liking this video? Support this ministry.
Give
Support this leader Liking this video? Support this ministry.
665K followers
Dr. Tony Evans is the founder and senior pastor of Oak Cliff Bible Fellowship in Dallas, founder and president of The Urban Alternative and author of over 100 books, booklets and Bible studies.
665K followers
0:02 God made the statement when he created, let them rule. Psalm 1 15 verse 160:13 says that God rules in the heavens, but he has given the earth to the sons of men to0:25 rule. The implications of that are staggering. Because what it means is is that God has decided to respect your0:37 decisions. And that much of his action will be determined by our action.0:49 While he has maintained a base of sovereign boundaries, a sphere where he will not allow man to trespass on. He has opened up a field1:01 of play where we get to call the particular play, and he will respond accordingly. That explains a whole lot. It explains1:12 why God allows How can a good God, a great God, a powerful God allow that to happen? Because let them rule. I will1:24 respect within my sovereign boundaries their decisions. So if they make their decisions in concert with me, then they1:36 will get my response accordingly. If they make their decisions antithetical to me, then they will get the results of that. God planted Adam in a garden.1:48 He planted in the sphere of his calling. From every tree of the garden, you may freely eat. The essence of your Christian life should be measured by what you get to enjoy, not what2:00 you are denied of. You know you're entering into a realm of false religion when the emphasis is all you can't do as a Christian2:12 rather than all you are free to do. From every tree of the garden, you may freely eat. But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, that is2:24 off limits. In other words, you are not to determine for yourself what is good or bad, right or wrong. That is not within your realm of option.2:37 You ought to live by revelation, not human determination. And so that was the limitation to remind man of his subordination underneath2:48 God. Which leads us to our passage today. God has now put man in his sphere. He has given man3:00 his limitations as well as his fluidity. And now comes a staggering reality3:12 whose implications I think you will see are far beyond perhaps what you would expect. I'm gonna tell you now, some of the things we're gonna go over today aren't gonna be popular.3:26 Everybody not gonna be happy. And 1 week, 1 group's gonna shout, and the next week, the other group's gonna shout. So3:38 if I'm a little hard on you today, I'm not hating. I believe in equal opportunity chastisement. So there's gonna be3:50 some things shared that will be sort of rock your world a little bit, but it will be essential in reclaiming your spiritual authority. Then,4:01 verse 18 says, after God had created man as a successful single, for he's not4:13 married yet. Then, after God had given man his divine framework in which he was to operate in,4:27 then the Lord God said, it is not good for the man to be alone. I will make him a helper suitable for4:39 him. Now God has spent the whole week talking about what's good. He created the light. It's good. He created the animal. It's good.4:51 It's good. It's good. It's good. And now, he comes to a place in his creation where he says it's not good. There's 1 thing5:03 missing in this creation, and that is Adam is alone, and that's not good.5:17 Now before we go any further, it's not Adam saying it's not good. Adam's hey.5:31 Adam is not complaining. The reason Adam is not complaining is that he is a satisfied single. And what's made him5:43 satisfied is the fulfillment of his calling. He has been placed in a realm of service to God that has5:55 been so satisfactory that he's okay. He's managing singlehood fine. The only way I know6:08 to instruct a single Christian how to be single and successful until your change comes is to be satisfying your calling.6:20 Your divine appointment under God. If there is no sense that you are satisfying your divine appointment under God. That's why the Bible says in first Corinthians 7, in6:32 a long section given to singles, he says, during that status, while you are single, you are to be fully devoted to your calling. Because6:44 that is what will sustain you during the time when you are not in the state perhaps you want to be in, prefer to be in, desire to be in.6:56 Like Adam, he says, you are to function in your garden, your divine place of placement, and every Christian has 1.7:08 But God determines it is not good for man to be alone. I will make him a helper suitable for him. Before7:20 God ever made a woman, He made man, and first of all, gave him a job.7:37 First thing he did was give him a job. In other words, the man knew responsibility under God before he was given responsibility over a woman.7:49 When a man has not learned responsibility under God, He will be irresponsible over the 1 he has8:01 placed. When a woman comes underneath an irresponsible man, She has opened herself up to8:13 a very frustrating life. Before God ever create chapter 2 actually belongs in chapter 1. Because chapter 1, God has already created.8:25 The Bible says God created man in his own image. Chapter 2 is telling you how he did it. And the reason he wants you to know how he did it is that the process of him8:37 doing it is very important for the purpose for which he did it in the first place. And the reason in chapter 1 he did it in the first place was to let them rule, that8:49 is to occupy and express spiritual authority in history on God's behalf. They were to rule the earth on God's behalf. The first thing he did was created Adam. He9:01 created Adam. He gave Adam a calling and a responsibility, and he decided it's not good for you to be alone. Now the question is, why is it not9:13 good? Why is it not good? The first answer most people will give is companionship.9:24 Companionship. I would like to throw you a curveball today. That's not the reason why it's not good for man to be alone.9:37 I don't see Adam complaining, I'm by myself. It's God determining it's not good. Why is it not good for9:49 Adam just to be hanging out by himself and doing his thing because the boy needs help. Well,10:01 no, I ain't make that up. Verse 18. I will make him a helper suitable for him. Now the question is,10:12 why does my man need help? Because while he was created perfect, he was created intentionally10:23 incomplete. God created Adam in such a way, watch this now, that the task of dominion, the10:34 responsibility of ruling, could not sufficiently be done without assistance. He could not pull off God's intention for10:46 his life if he sought to pull it off alone at this particular point in his life. For the preceding time, before there was a woman, he could pull it off.10:58 But now, for the level that God wanted to use him at and take him to, he could not pull this off by himself. He was going to need help. So let me explain something.11:10 Companionship, which I'll talk about in a moment, while very important, was not God's first concern. God's first concern was his command to let them rule in chapter 1 or to11:21 exercise dominion or spiritual authority. And so what he says, if I you're gonna pull off what I have designed for you to pull off at this point in your life. You cannot pull11:33 it off alone. The problem is you don't know that yet. Because, Adam, you think you all that. You think you can handle this all by yourself, but you cannot, and therefore,11:45 it is not good in light of what I'm expecting from you, what I'm looking to you for, what I'm anticipating you to do. This cannot be done without assistance.11:59 Let me put it another way. Your calling precedes your sexuality.12:11 Let me say it another way. Having somebody by you who can help you12:24 achieve what God has for you takes priority over knocking boots. Let me say it another way. Having12:36 assistance to achieve dominion is more important than how pretty she is. What he wants you to know12:48 is that I created you for dominion. I created you to rule, mister. I created you to act on my behalf in history, and you're gonna help you're gonna13:00 need help in getting there. Now I'm a throw a little fun in there along the way, but my purpose for your assistance is your dominion. The13:12 Hebrew word help the Hebrew word help means 1 who shares in the13:23 responsibility with whom you collaborate in order to fulfill your purpose. You do not have all the information. You do not have all the13:34 perspectives. You do not have all the intellect. I am going to give you someone who will complete what you are lacking. If you had it13:46 all, you wouldn't need help. If you had it all, you wouldn't need assistance. Now that means that the purpose of the companion is not just to cook food or13:58 to wash clothes or to wipe noses. All of that has its place, and we'll talk about that. But the reason God gave Adam Eve14:10 was so there would be a collaborative effort in his rule. There would be a person near to him who understands him, who could give14:21 a perspective to him that he did not otherwise have. Therefore, any man who does not utilize his mate for14:33 her mind, her skills, her intellect, her training, and her giftedness is a fool. Any man14:45 who waste all that God has given a woman, not only in her skill base and her intellect base, but in her emotional base. Because what men14:57 will often do is argue logically, and what women will often do is tell you how they feel. And often, when what she feels doesn't agree15:09 with what we think, Her feelings are dismissed because they do not agree with the logical pattern we may have erected. But you have to understand that God has15:21 put in her brain by creation more nerve endings designed to pick up on more perceptions and intuitions that logic is not15:32 sufficient to address. So what you are to tap into is her sensing of an issue, her understanding of an issue before15:44 you have finalized your decision. Now we're get to this. I wasn't able to fit it in the sermon today. God does give the man the right to make the final decision as ahead.15:57 What he does not give the man the right to do is to make it independently of collaboration. That her thoughts, feelings, perspectives, input is to be fully16:07 incorporated into the decision because she's supposed to help you rule. And trust me, the more she feels like she is part of the rulership16:19 of this company called your home in achieving the calling of God, the more responsive she's gonna be to you as her head. The less she feels16:32 she's needed, valued, appreciated, and her input is to be automatically, naturally incorporated into the well-being of the direction,16:44 the less responsive she will be because she will feel that she does not matter. Therefore, it is the role of Adam to take help that is16:56 what he calls suitable. He says, I'm a give you a helper who's suitable. The Hebrew word help suitable means17:07 essential contributor, specifically designed to complement what God is calling you to do. A fitting17:18 complement. Single ladies, 1 of the questions you wanna ask when that man proposes to you is does he need me? I17:30 suspect if he's proposing to you, he wants you. But I didn't ask him that question. After the won't has been satisfied, does he need you,17:42 or are you simply a sophisticated maid service? Because if that's all you are, and there is a part to be played in that, but but if that's all you are, if he does17:53 not want your mind, your thoughts, if he doesn't want your input, then he doesn't need you. And you don't want to simply be wanted, you want to be18:05 needed. You want to be an essential part of this partnership because I will make man male and female. And so he18:17 says, man needs help. He needs help to do what? To fulfill my instruction. What is my instruction? Let them rule. Let them rule. So she is to be18:29 part and parcel of the dominion purposes of God. Man needed to know that before a woman was made. God wasn't gonna make a18:41 woman until a man understood her role. She was not to be used. She was not to simply be a sex symbol. She was not to simply be up on a computer screen to be looked at. She was not18:52 simply to be made to be put in a magazine to be reviewed. She was not simply to be made, and I hope you ladies will not allow yourself to be made into a spectacle rather than somebody that's needed and19:04 valued, and you're not just put here to turn some fellas on. You are here because you have been substantively created to be a part of this rulership process.19:17 And that's just verse 18. Let me say this here. Adam was created first19:29 on purpose. The Bible says that. We're gonna look at the passages. It says Adam is created first. Why? Because he was supposed to be head of the home. He was supposed to be the head in19:41 the church. The Bible says that. Says he was created to be head. So before woman was created, God created him and set him straight underneath God. He was to be subordinate19:52 underneath God. She was to be subordinate underneath him. He was to be, watch this now, subordinate underneath God. You're getting ready to see that? She was supposed to be subordinate unequal to20:04 him, but when it came to function, subordinate underneath him. She was to be equal to him, male and female, but when it came to function like Jesus is to the father, subordinate to20:16 him. Now here's the kicker. The subordination of the woman under the man was tied to the subordination of the man underneath God. If the man20:28 refused to be subordinate underneath God, it would show up in the rebellion of the woman and her refusal to be subordinate underneath him. So if your wife20:39 is giving you a headache underneath you, it could be because you've given God a headache underneath him. And he's gonna let you feel the headache he has by letting20:51 you share in his headache with the 1 who's supposed to be subordinate under you. So before you complain she's not submitting, are you modeling what submission looks like?21:04 If you want her to ask you first, are you asking him first? If you're not checking with him, why should she check with you so that you can lead her from him?21:17 There is a process of subordination that allows rulership to occur. Stick with me, man. I love you.21:30 Because the man is created first. Out of the ground, God forms every beast of the field, every bird of the sky. He brings them to man to see what he would call them. And whatever the21:41 man called a living creature, that was its name. He gives them the cattle and the birds of the sky and every beast of the field.21:54 I titled this message when I was talking to just the men, why I love being a man. Why I love being a man. I love being a man. I can't that sometime I get up in the22:06 morning, look in the mirror and say, thank God. I love me being a man.22:18 And this is why. It says, he brought to Adam, because what is not here yet? His creation. And here's what I like.22:31 To see what He would name them. And whatever He named them, God ok'd it.22:42 God authorized it. God let him govern it. Let me tell you what naming means in the Bible. Naming means ownership and the exercising of22:54 authority over. Name is not nomenclature, not just giving a word to it. Adam had the job of studying what was brought before him. He named everything from the aardvark to the23:05 zebra. A to Z, It was brought before him. He analyzed it, looked at it, classified it, and then named it. And whatever he named,23:18 that was its name. He took ownership of, exercised authority of, and determined what that thing would be.23:30 The reason I talk to men about loving to be a man is that God has given men the unique ability and responsibility to determine what something23:41 becomes. In other words, God stood behind what Adam and Adam did because Adam was given rule. He was given authority, and 1 of the great23:52 privileges specifically to men, because there is no woman yet, is the authority to name what God brings. Now you say, how does this differ from prosperity theology naming and24:04 claiming? It's a big difference because Adam could only name what God brought him. He couldn't just name what he wanted. You just can't go out there naming stuff. You gotta name something God wants you to have. You can't24:16 just name something because you want it. It says whatever God brought him, that was his name. So that's why you gotta be operating underneath God to even know if God brought it. Therefore, you can name24:28 it, and God will endorse it. God has got opportunity out there he wants you to name. He's got career out there he wants you to name. He's got opportunity. He got circumstance out there he wants you to24:40 name. But if you don't know you have that authority, let them rule, then everybody else will be naming stuff for you. Because the worst thing is for a man24:51 not to know his own name. And that's a problem today because many men haven't been raised to know their names, to know who you are underneath God. He brings them all the25:03 animals to name. Naming involved exercising dominion over the creation underneath the Creator, because God brought it,25:15 so it starts with God, it was given to man, and man names it. Verse 20 says, however, but for Adam25:28 there was not found a helper suitable for him. So he sees mister and missus Beth, mister and missus Zebra, mister25:40 and missus, you know, Aardvark, mister and missus Roach. He sees mister and missus because all the animals are created at the same time. So he's watching he's watching this come along. He's25:52 just naming them and naming them, and everybody's paired up. But for Adam, what did God do before he made26:03 Eve? He let Adam see what he was missing. In other words, a need had to be created before26:15 a woman would have been made, because the woman was to help him. And so God uses this naming, this dominion calling in order for him to26:26 name. So he evaluates, he assigns the proper name in order to bring creation under his control. The name stuck. Whatever he named26:38 them, that was his name. Now watch this ladies. The Lord God, once he realizes he can't do this by himself,26:50 causes Adam to go to sleep. I love this phrase. So the Lord God, verse 21, called the deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept. If God puts you27:02 to sleep, you're gonna sleep. And he slept. Then he took 1 of the ribs and closed up the flesh at that27:13 place and fashioned a woman from the rib which he had taken from the man. God performs surgery.27:25 He slits Adam's side and takes the side away. Adam right now is only half the man he used to be,27:37 because a big part of him is missing. While he was single, he had both ribs. Now that he's married, a rib is gone, a whole aside, this cavity has been removed.27:52 And God fashions a woman. The word fashioned is not used of the creation of man. God reached down the grave, just threw some dirt together, made man.28:09 Just took some stuff like The word fashion means to build intricately. So when a man says28:20 about a woman, she sure is built. He's being very biblical at that point. God took his rib and he crafted28:33 a woman from the rib. Now, if Adam wants his rib back, if he wants what he's lost,28:45 he's gotta get it from the woman because the woman has it. But the woman, if he's gonna get his rib back, is bringing more back than he lost. Because28:57 he lost a piece of him, but God took a piece of him and made a whole something new that was a lot like him but different from him. Hot and29:08 cold are alike because they're both temperatures, but they're distinct and different. Red and yellow are alike because they're both colors, but they're distinctly different.29:20 Man and woman are alike because they're part of mankind, human, but distinctly different. He was to get back his rib, and in getting back his29:32 rib, he was to get back more than he started with. Remember, the idea is a helper, So God took part of him and made more29:43 in her so that when he brought her to him, there would be an asset he did not have when he started. So he made the woman29:57 and brought her to man. So God is in the matchmaking business. He's playing Cupid here because he goes the man asleep, he goes makes a woman30:10 and brings the woman. Ladies, she wakes up, the first thing she sees is God. She doesn't know anything about Adam. She's an adult woman. The first thing she sees is God. She doesn't say, oh, I'm 25 and I'm30:22 not married yet. No. She puts her hand, watch this now, in God's hand,30:34 and it says, God brought her to Adam. You don't have to go clubbing to find him. You don't have to get on the Internet and see who am I like. You don't have to do30:46 all that. All you got to do is put your hand in the hand of the 1 who God knows that rib belongs to him. Because you start searching for30:58 your own ribs, and you're gonna find yourself in a mess. Now you pursue your calling on to God until he hooks his sister up.31:12 The Lord God fashions a woman with the rib and brings her to man. So God made a hookup. Another thing, some31:24 of the places you ladies are going to look for men. I'm a talk about that, man. Okay. If the31:36 key to the man is your being able to help him fulfill his calling unto God, if that's the key, everything else is a bonus from that key, Then you wanna find a man who has31:48 that as a concern. No. Your job is to compliment his calling. So if he doesn't even have 1 and is not looking for 1, I can tell you now, if he32:00 doesn't have a job, he ain't looking for a calling. Anyway, he brings her to32:12 man. He brings her to man and says, this is now bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh. She shall be called32:24 woman because she was taken out of man. She's like me, bone in my bone, flesh in my flesh. We'll talk about that in just a second.32:36 She shall be called woman. Okay, ladies, This is why you have to take your husband's name. Okay? I get these, you know, feminist types. I wanna keep my own name. Okay? Well, keep your own life.32:53 She takes Adam's name. Adam's name means man. She's man taken out of Adam's womb, so he calls her womb man.33:05 Guess what he does? Name her. What he named her became a her name because it is the role of a man to33:17 name his woman. And to name his woman is not only nomenclature, it is to exercise governance over33:28 as long as the man is underneath God. It is to exercise authority, legitimate authority over. So if that woman is not willing to33:40 come under your leadership and your leadership is legitimate, if you're single, that's not I don't care how pretty she is. You're gonna be pretty miserable. If she does not33:52 willing to come under your authority and respect your authority, what do we call God? We call him Lord. What does the Bible say in first Peter 3 that a woman should call34:04 her husband? Lord. The same name that we as men use to God, a woman is supposed to be able to use to her husband, but the idea is she34:16 doesn't mind using it because you're governing so good. You're governing so well. You're leading so strongly. You're directing so clearly.34:29 But if she's not willing to do that, then you're in for you're in for a war, World War 3. Now, the other side is true. She won't submit has it ever been illustrated to her,34:41 because you're supposed to be modeling the submission you're demanding. So he says this is bone by bone. Now we have the nuptials, first wedding ceremony. For this reason a man shall leave34:53 his father and his mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become 1 flesh. Please notice it's the man leaving his mother a father. There is nothing said about a35:05 woman leaving her mother and father. And in this particular context, there is no mother and father. Adam doesn't have a mother and a father. So evidently, Adam was real impressed35:17 with Eve because he said, if I had 1, I'd leave it from her for her. God goes out and he fashions this magnificent specimen called35:29 woman. So, a man is supposed to leave his father and mother. Now what does this mean, to leave your35:41 father and mother? The word cleave means to bond or stick like glue. That's what cleave means. In other words, his priority attachment and his35:53 priority relationship is to be his wife. Now, let me make sure we all understand. He's not to dishonor his mother and father. 1 of the commandments is to honor your mother and father. That includes how you talk36:04 to them, that includes financially supporting them if that's needed. You are to honor your mother and father, but what you are not to do is place the relationship of mother and father36:16 over husband and wife. Now, the man is to leave mother and father, he's to cleave to his wife, and here we are, here we are, this could be a whole sermon here,36:28 and the 2 shall become 1 flesh, and the 2 shall become 1 flesh,36:40 and the 2 shall become 1 flesh. Now, when a woman gets pregnant, a sperm36:52 infiltrates an egg. In fact, there's a wraith on to see who gets that first. Everybody's headed toward this 1 direction.37:05 To penetrate the egg in order that the 2, egg and sperm, become 1 so that something37:17 new is brought into existence. Stick with me here. This principle is illustrated in childbirth. The 2, egg and sperm, become 1,37:30 and out of the 1, something comes into existence that's never ever existed before. When the 2 become 1, just37:42 like in a in a pregnancy or conception, the same principle is true. The reason most marriages today37:54 are in trouble is the 2 don't wanna become 1, refuse to become 1, so they function as 2 while38:06 living as 1. In other words, they still occupy the same space, they sleep in the same bed, they go to the same house, they eat at the same38:17 table, but not as 1. They do it as 2. But the purpose of marriage wasn't for 2 to stay 2, it was for 238:29 to become something that never ever existed before, and that is 1. You hear it in all kind of ways. This is my money. This is her money. This is my car. This38:41 is her car. This is my her. My her. They talk in terms of 2. Now I'm not talking about having different accounts for different things. I'm talking about a mindset that is 2. As long38:53 as you're 2, you won't be 1, and until you're 1, you'll never have dominion. You'll never rule because Satan will always be39:05 able to block the rule because whenever there is division, the Bible says God steps out of it. And when God steps out of it, you can't pray about it. You can't you39:16 can't no. You can't do any of that. You must decide as a couple, we are going to be 1. Now that doesn't mean males become females and females become males. It means that we're going to operate on39:28 the same page. We're going to be 1. Since the your your salary and my salary make our money 1, we will talk about having39:40 our bills paid by us, and as part of that, you have some spending money, and I have some spending money, but that has come out of an agreement that we have made39:52 because the goal here is, 1, not trying to make 2 work. So we spend all of this time trying to make 2 work when God is not interested in 2. He's interested40:04 in 1. He's interested in a sperm getting into an egg, creating something that has never ever existed before. The problem today is that people don't want 1Show more
Comments No comments yet. Start the conversation.
Comments
Keep it kind. Comments are public.