Skip to content August 12 - Family Session 6 - Every Man Ministries Dusty Davis Aug 5 · 19 min ...more
August 12 - Family Session 6 - Every Man Ministries Dusty Davis
August 5, 2026 · 19 min
Series Pray TV August 5, 2026 · 19 min · Pray TV
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0:25 Well, back from your study in session 6 of being God's man and leading your family. And guys, it's week 6 and we're entering the home stretch. So you gotta start to pray about what's next for you in your get healthy0:37 journey. Prayerfully consider where God's taking you and the group of men you're going through this with. Maybe it's into the battle against temptation. Maybe it's a study to understand what biblical intimacy looks like0:48 and how to pursue your wife's heart. Or maybe it's the journey of unpacking the importance of having godly friendships. Whatever it is, the entire Get Healthy Cycle is here and ready and designed to1:00 produce strength in you. So so that you can be God's man in your home. So you can be a leader in your church and a servant in your community. Guys, our culture is dying to experience1:11 stronger men. Here at Everyman Ministries, our prayer is that we want to present every man perfected in Christ. We do that by teaching and admonishing every man according to Colossians 1 28. So1:23 we'll be praying for you and please be praying about what God has next for you and the group of men you're walking with. Okay? Alright. Back to today's session where we're gonna talk about having fun. Yes, man. Contrary1:33 to popular belief, our God is a God of joy, of fun, of laughter. So let the good times roll, as a family. I've got 4 kids and early on in our parenting1:45 journey, my wife and I decided that family time was gonna be fun. We wanted our kids to associate our time together with with having a blast. We wanted them to look back fondly on all the times that we had together1:57 as a family, so we'd intentionally plan. Right? We'd plan game nights and surf trips. We'd go on hikes. As the kids grew up, we set up an official Davis family text thread, so that we could hype up family dinners that2:09 were coming up or or talk about football games that we wanted to watch together. See guys, we had decided that we were gonna have fun as a family, but it didn't just happen. It took intentionality. It took planning.2:21 And guys, if we don't create a fun environment inside the home, then culture is gonna work overtime to lure your kids outside of the home. And this is sad because this has become the story for far2:33 too many homes. Right? Home is now the last place that kids want to be, especially teenagers. That is if they feel like home is a place where they're just criticized, where they just hear their parents argue, where2:45 family time feels either haphazard or not well thought out, if kids feel like they're corrected over every little thing they say and do, if they're receiving unsolicited advice, it starts to feel more like an2:55 inquisition. K, guys, calm down. I'm not saying that a fun house is a house with anarchy. I'm not saying we shouldn't speak truth to our kids. Tough conversations are actually 1 of the most important part of home3:07 life, but not every single conversation needs to be a tough 1. If your home's not a safe place where your family can just enjoy time together, where your kids can just be, your kids are gonna find reasons to not be3:19 around. Like I said, home doesn't have to be a place without rules, but if it's a place without relationship, you're starting to lose something important. A home's gotta be a place where your kids feel safe, and if it's3:30 not, they'll find other places to be. They'll find other activities with other people outside your home. That's where they're gonna go looking for all of the laughter and fun and adventure that that they're missing out3:40 on when they're at home. Guys, if home is just a place of stress, kids are gonna avoid it. If it's devoid of the depth of relationship, then they're gonna seek that somewhere else. Guys, I promise you, I don't wanna3:52 sugarcoat it. Your high schoolers are not gonna wanna be home every Friday night. I don't care how awesome your home is. But can I tell you something? Make no mistake, all the kids that spend all of their Friday and4:01 Saturday nights at parties, they're looking for stuff that they're missing at home. And they're gonna walk away from that party house always feeling empty. It's really hard, guys. It's hard to put family nights together.4:12 It's so easy to make excuses as to why not to. Right? We don't have the time. We can't afford it. My kids are so busy. Right? Everybody's tired. The kids don't even want to. And here's 1 of the things that makes that4:24 really hard. All that stuff's true, right? Your kids are probably busy with really, really good stuff. Church and school and friends and sports, it's not bad stuff that usually takes over our4:36 calendar. 1 struggle for my home is the large age gap I have between my oldest and my youngest, or the fact that I've got boys and girls under our roof. Sometimes it's just hard to find stuff that everybody4:48 enjoys doing together. Guys, all of those concerns are real and true. But the real issue we don't plan these types of nights, the real core issue why dad doesn't take the initiative and5:00 plan a fun night for the family is not usually about the calendar. It's usually about our priorities. It's usually an issue of the heart. And guys, it's usually a symptom of our own selfishness.5:12 Anytime as a man that I come up with excuses for why I can't plan a family night, I'm really just telling you that I won't plan a family night, that I'm not willing. And that's usually because I'm protecting my own5:22 schedule. Guys do this when we're being lazy. Right? Or we want to protect our own outlets for enjoyment. And all of this is at the expense of our wife and our kids. Guys, having fun together isn't just a5:34 neat idea. It actually has incredible benefits for you and your family. Now, we're gonna unpack just a couple of those, right? 1st, creating opportunities for having fun in your house is5:46 gonna strengthen the connections between everybody in your family. It's going to create, it's going to renew, and it's going to strengthen the relationships that you have with each other, the connection you feel with5:56 each other. As you start to have shared experiences, right, joys, adventures, memories, The family just gets closer and closer. It's awesome. It makes your relationships better. Guys, I pray your6:08 home is like mine, full of inside jokes. Right? Stories that we still tell that leave us rolling in laughter. And making those memories, it doesn't just happen on the big vacation or at the expensive dinners. Don't6:20 so don't get lost in the extravagance. Right? Just focus on consistency. Make these moments. Your goal is many over momentous. Alright? More important often than what we're doing as a family is6:32 just how often we do it. Plans can be large and small. Structured and unstructured, guys. Right? Big vacations, concerts, and dinners out, just down to walks. Maybe a card game or a meal that you guys make6:44 together at home. Guys, in all of it, our role as God's man leading our families is to create a culture in our home that allows for deep relationships with each6:55 other and deeper relationships with God. All those times together accomplish this mission, guys. So the best dads discipline themselves towards making these spaces, making sure that fun times happen for their7:07 families. Guys, in our house, fun looks like a whole lot of stuff. Right? It could be everything from an unplanned run down to the local gelato place after dinner, or taking our kids to 1 on 1 mission trips around the7:17 world. College game days on Saturday mornings with breakfast cooked outside or a morning surf, a weekend camp trip, or maybe just a game of volleyball down at the beach at sunset. But can I encourage you guys? Your kids'7:29 reactions will not always be awesome. There's the groans of, I already have plans, so be ready. But press in. Have some unscheduled fun, but also plan some very intentional7:41 dates that the kids and your wife can look forward to and plan for. Remember, as a dad, you set the tone. Your attitude, your perseverance during that night is gonna go a long way. Don't go dictator7:53 mode and try to mandate happiness and fun, but just press into the night. You make sure that you keep your phone away. Just keep going forward. Don't get deterred. Leading your family into fun is so important. Make8:04 family time a priority and then choose to be present when you're there. I love family time being a no phone zone. But dad, you gotta set the tone there. Screens down, eyes up, be present with your family. Eye contact8:16 shows our wife and kids how much they really mean to us. And sometimes guys invite your wife and kids in the planning, especially the kids, makes them feel invested. It goes a long way to creating good excitement and buy8:26 in. Sometimes in our house we'll even kind of vote on a couple different ideas. It gets everybody a little more excited. And don't react when not all of the ideas are even possible or based in reality. Just just keep8:37 going. Because afterwards, guys, everybody's stoked. Even my adult kids are so excited that they were there, just stoked to be a part of it. Because we've got new stories and new experiences. Right? Our lives are now8:49 knit together with 1 more stitch. So that's the 1st benefit, guys. All of that. Family time together, having fun means deeper connection. The 2nd benefit is it actually reduces stress.9:01 Anytime the dad can kind of step out of work mode or honey do mode while he's around the house, anytime mom can call time out on work, set aside chores, the family stress starts to lower. The temperature in the home9:12 kinda drops. It's true for the kids too. Right? Setting down the stress of school and sports, all the stuff they have going on during the day, just life in general being a team. It's hard to be a kid today. And so9:24 when your family becomes that safe place where everybody can just kinda pause and breathe, when home's a safe place they can just be filled up, the stress goes down and everybody's drawn in. And you guys can laugh9:36 together, have some fun together when home is more than just a place to eat and sleep and do chores. Boys, you're onto something good. Don't be surprised when real dialogue9:48 starts to open up. Conversation starts to flow more easily. Right? It gives you a chance to talk outside of just the daily details of life, getting summaries of what's going on. You get to start and get into the stuff9:58 that your kids are excited about. And they'll start to share with you the stuff that they're concerned about. Right? As the stress goes down, the kids can kind of start to process what it is that they're experiencing at10:09 school, with friends. Guys, you're creating an atmosphere where people feel safe, seen, and secure. And as that happens, home becomes a place your kids are gonna start to pursue. It becomes a10:20 community that they're gonna prioritize. I think laughter is a big part of all this too. Everybody takes themselves too seriously nowadays. We're so quick to get offended and then we don't laugh at ourselves anymore. I10:32 think it's a really healthy skill. I laugh at myself often and rightfully so, but a lot of times I can gauge the spiritual temperature in my house by just looking at the laughter quotient. If that's low, if no one's10:44 laughing, it means that we're starting to get stressed out or maybe we're becoming self absorbed. Maybe we're letting our frustrations, get the better of us or maybe people just feel unseen. Right? We might be near 110:56 another but we're disconnected. You know what we have to do in that moment, guys? We gotta disrupt it a little bit. I intentionally do things that sort of interrupt that that self absorption to bring a smile or to make11:06 my kids laugh. Right? I'll bring out my most brutal dad joke in that moment. The cornier, the better. Or maybe I'll walk in and shout, okay, anybody who's not on a phogue, it's 5 bucks. I actually will have a 5 dollar11:17 bill in my hand. I've actually handed my kids the word on their phones money. We quote lines from movies that make us laugh. Make a weird face at your kid at the dinner table. Guys will walk in, tell him you love him and11:26 give him a kiss. Just break up the monotony in the home. Laugh some good music. Interrupt the digital algorithm. Just bring back human contact. Alright. 3rd11:37 benefit of seeking intentional fun in the house, it's gonna create more stories. To be human is to share and tell stories. With 4 kids in our house,11:49 we have got a lot of stories. Right? Legendary trips searching for midnight In N Out burgers. April fools jokes that went really, really bad. Mission trips in Mexico where the family van had to become a boat and12:01 forge a river. Camping trips where I had to defend my family. Against coordinated skunk attacks, losing our dog, me breaking stuff, finding our dog, impromptu dance parties. Guys, this is just some of the stuff that goes12:13 on in our home. Here's a question though. What stories are your children gonna tell? What memories are they gonna cling to? What are the traditions, right, the adventures, the funny stories that are gonna define12:25 your family? Because some of that stuff I bet is coming up right now. It's coming to mine. Guys, we tell these stories today in our house because they become part of our lives. So look at all the stuff we've seen so far12:36 from fun. Better connection, less stress, more stories to go back on. So many benefits. The next 1, it might be the best of all and the most surprising. Right? All that,12:48 that fun, the laughter, those memories actually lead to spiritual growth. What? Hear me out. As a spiritual leader in my household, I find that my own ability to enjoy my12:59 family, to slow down and engage them, to laugh with them or encourage them or just to celebrate with them, is a direct reflection of whether or not I'm connected to God in meaningful ways. Here's why.13:11 I'm only available to celebrate with, right, to laugh or kind of even to focus on the people around me when my eyes are off myself, right, when God's spirit in me is turning my eyes13:23 outward. When I'm rooted in the love of Jesus, right, when I'm anchored in his love for me, I've got the margin to focus on others. I've got love and laughter to give away. When my eyes are13:35 off myself, my eyes are open to what it is that my kids need. Right? Who needs to be cheered up? Who needs to be listened to? Guys, all this reveals that the Holy Spirit is alive and well in me. So I can see that as my13:46 family is healthy and having fun, it's a direct reflection that, that we're growing. And as the leader of the family, that I'm growing spiritually. Guys, it means that I'm giving myself away. The stuff that God's put in13:57 me is get out to my kids. I wanna make having fun with my family a priority. Right? While they're still in my home. But guys, the opposite's also true.14:09 When when when I feel distance the Lord, when I'm not spending time in the word, when my spiritual growth is somehow stunted, then I become larger. My problems become more controlling of my mind. Right? I become14:21 more self absorbed. I become more worried about what what I'm dealing with. So intentionally setting aside time just to enjoy my family is gonna reveal where we're at spiritually. Alright.14:33 1 more benefit. Fun times together increase spiritual authority and impact. How can that be? How can having fun give me the opportunity to speak truth14:45 into my children's life? I mean, those 2 things even related? Well, when a dad is making these kind of deposits into the lives of his kids and his family and he's deepening his relationships,14:57 it's an important part of leading your family because if it's all rules and there's no relationship, it always leads to rebellion. A relationship that's just built on instruction and correction, I don't care how true it15:08 is, it's always gonna feel hollow. But when we have these deep relationships, right, when we share fun together, when we laugh together, we create this deep intimacy that leads to spiritual connection. When my15:20 kids don't just experience me as a disciplinarian, right, when our conversations move past just being transactional, when questions don't just feel like interrogation, when we're laughing, when15:32 they're sharing their hearts with me, now there's the potential for serious influence in my kid's life. Guys, I want you to understand me clearly here. I'm not saying that we15:44 lower our standards or that we become lackadaisical parents, but I want to encourage us into some balance. When my kids laugh with me and surf with me and have fun with me, it opens the door. It gives me that15:56 relational capital, right? So that I can speak truth into their lives when correction has to come. When my relationship with my kids holds both sides, then they can receive correction and love,16:08 truth and discipline, laughter and tough conversations, right? They all can be part of our relationship. Guys, when I've shared waves and hiked trails and watched movies and made cookies together,16:21 and then I need to have a difficult conversation, it can actually be received because it's being received in the context of a deep relationship. We've shared waves, hiked trails, watched movies, and made cookies16:32 together. So when correction comes, it comes in the context of that whole relationship, that deep relationship. So hit the fast forward button, my kids are now grown but they still like to be16:44 at the house. And that's something my wife and I prayed for and then took steps to make sure it happened. Our house is very small, but the door is always open and the fridge is always full. It probably looks like some16:55 kind of upscale orphanage to our neighbors or maybe a used car lot. I'm not sure. Our home is always full of middle schoolers, high schoolers, now even college kids. And that's because we have great relationships with17:06 our kids, relationships that took years to develop with each of them individually and with our family as a whole. And so for our kids now, home is safe and it's fun. You17:18 can have deep conversations and light hearted laughter. And you know what? All of that took time guys. It's really hard. It's really long. It's a few steps forward and a couple steps back, but you know what? It's17:29 completely worth it because at that point you you enjoy an amazing life together. The connected life that Jesus promised, the abundant life. Guys, sparks still fly in our house. Apologies17:41 are very common. But there's a depth of relationship that just covers it all. If you didn't have that growing up in your house, if this is all new for you, I want you to be encouraged because you can become the anchor17:52 generation for your family. You could start something new that'll last for generations. Okay. As you go to your connect with the group time, you're gonna take a long look at your own family, at the18:04 relationships that you build, and what fun has looked like in your house. What I want you to do is this, be open and be honest. Remember, this is about where we're heading guys, going forward. So be18:16 willing to do something new. Take a risk this week and have some fun with your family.
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