Skip to content How to Come to Grips with the Real You, Part 2 Mar 16 · 25 min ...more
How to Come to Grips with the Real You, Part 2
March 16, 2026 · 25 min
Being comfortable with who God made you to be is a lifelong pursuit. But God has created you for a unique purpose. Chip helps you begin to discover how to come to grips with the real YOU.
Series God's Dream for Your Life March 16, 2026 · 25 min · God's Dream for Your Life
Being comfortable with who God made you to be is a lifelong pursuit. But God has created you for a unique purpose. Chip helps you begin to discover how to come to grips with the real YOU. ...more Show the full description Show less Being comfortable with who God made you to be is a lifelong pursuit. But God has created you for a unique purpose. Chip helps you begin to discover how to come to grips with the real YOU.
Series God's Dream for Your Life Support this leader Liking this video? Support this ministry.
Support this leader
Liking this video? Support this ministry.
Give
Support this leader Liking this video? Support this ministry.
618K followers
Chip Ingram is an American Christian pastor, author, and teacher. He is the founder, teaching pastor and CEO of Living on the Edge, an international teaching and discipleship ministry.
618K followers
Comments No comments yet. Start the conversation.
Up next Autoplay More from Chip Ingram Prayer That Brings Revival, Part 2 Chip Ingram
Prayer That Brings Revival, Part 1 Chip Ingram
No Revival Without Repentance, Part 2 Chip Ingram
No Revival Without Repentance, Part 1 Chip Ingram
Urgent and Dependent, Part 2 Chip Ingram
Urgent and Dependent, Part 1 Chip Ingram
How Our Jobs Can Destroy Our Relationships, Part 2 Chip Ingram
Why Better Things Don't Always Make Things Better, Part 1 Chip Ingram
Why Better Things Don't Always Make Things Better, Part 2 Chip Ingram
Why a Change in Scenery Rarely Improves the View, Part 1 Chip Ingram
Why a Change in Scenery Rarely Improves the View, Part 2 Chip Ingram
Hiding from the Real You 0:11 Today on Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram.0:14 How do you come to grips with the real you? I mean, down deep. How do you discover0:20 who am I really and where do0:22 I belong and why did God put me on this planet And am I gonna discover it and actually do it? If those are questions that nag in the back of your mind, don't miss today's broadcast.0:36 Welcome to Living on the Edge. I'm Dave Drewy. And today, Chip Ingram continues our series called God's Dream for Your Life, How to Get It, Keep It, and Give It Away. We're exploring 1 of the most pressing0:48 questions. Who are you, really? Not the version you project to the world. Not the 1 shaped by what your parents said. Who does God say you are? Well, to get started, let's open our Bibles to1:00 Genesis chapter 3 verse 8 with the story of Adam and Eve. Here's Chip Ingram with his message titled, How to Come to Griefs with the Real You.1:10 They heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day. And the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. Then the Lord God called to1:22 the man and said to him, Where are you? By the way, this is not an informational question. This is diagnostic. God knew where he was. He's gonna ask a series of questions to help Adam discover where he's really at.1:34 Adam said, I heard the sound of you in the garden. I was afraid because I was naked, so I hid myself. If you got a pen where you pull it out, encircle afraid, naked, and hid. That'll come back1:46 later. You're gonna find there's a relational pattern in that that you have and I have and every human being has. And God said, who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree of which I've commanded you1:57 not to eat? And so he's going to answer, God, the woman that you gave me to be with me, she gave me from the tree, and I ate it. Then the Lord God said to the woman, what is this that you have done? And the2:09 woman, being a very quick study, says, the serpent deceived me and I ate. 3 obstacles you'll see in this passage about why it's so hard to come to grips with the real you. First2:21 is fear rooted in shame. Notice he says, I was afraid. Well, why? I was afraid because now, for the first time ever, Adam realizes he's naked.2:33 And and and don't Of course it's physical, but well, well beyond. What he realizes is he's exposed. Notice the second thing that happens in this Not only did they say I was afraid. He says hiding rooted in2:45 insecurity. See, when you're naked you feel insecure. You feel inadequate. And so you hide. Not only were you afraid, but I hide the real me from you, and you hide the real2:57 you from others and from God. The, third is blaming rooted in denial. The man says, it's the woman. The woman says, it's the serpent. But, ultimately, they they both3:09 They blame God. Now, here's Before we go on, because we're going to talk about Romans chapter 12 verses 3 through 8, is actually going to help you discover. I mean, the tipping3:20 point of discovering who you are, where you belong, and what you're supposed to do. Verse 3 will tell us in just a minute who you are. Verses 4 and 5 will say where you belong. And verses 6 through 8 will be the3:32 beginning of you getting really clear on your role and what you're supposed to do. Who are you? Verse 3. For by the grace of God given to me, I say to everyone among you, do not think of yourself more highly than youThink Soberly About Yourself 3:44 ought to think, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you. If you have that pen, pull it out, underline the word think, then when you get to then3:56 you ought, underline the word ought, but rather think, underline the word think, and then underline sober judgment. So you have think, ought, think, and sober judgment. You underlined4:07 ought because in the original language it's how you ought to think, but as they translated it for just a smoother reading, they omitted that word. The same root word, think, think, think, and sober judgment is4:19 all the same root word. The word sober judgment gives us the best idea. It's don't think of yourself like someone who's drunk. When a person's drunk, what do they do? There's an external4:31 influence that gets inside of them that causes them to look at life in a way that's not accurate. So he says, don't be drunk by the world system. Don't be drunk by whatever reason we think. Don't be drunk by what your4:41 family tells you. You need to have a sober self assessment. You need to think accurately about yourself. That's the first command. You need to come to the point where physically,4:53 relationally, spiritually, emotionally, your soul, you can look in the actual mirror and say, I'm fearfully and wonderfully made. And come to the point where these are my strengths.5:05 These are my weaknesses, God given. This is how he's given me, but where you think accurately about yourself. Notice, don't think too highly of yourself.5:18 Don't think too lowly of yourself, but to think of a sober or accurate judgment. And then this little phrase, notice it says, according to the measure of faith that God's given you.5:30 Newell, in his commentary on Romans, really puts it well. He says, faith in this situation is not a subjective faith. In other words, it's not a faith in Christ, it's the faith. He says, it's a standard by which we're5:41 to evaluate ourselves. This objective faith is the biblical view of ourself. It's who you are in Christ. It's how God has gifted you. It's understanding his plan for you. It's like5:53 the first 3 chapters of Ephesians. It's you need to see yourself as loved, adopted, sealed by the spirit. You have a purpose. You're his workmanship. Everything you6:05 need, you possess in Christ. You're a son. You're a daughter. You're forgiven. You're loved. That's who you are. Most of us don't think that way about ourselves.6:18 That's why the world has such pools on us. I'll be accepted, I'll be significant if I look like that, or if I act like that, or if I make so much money, or if people think this, or if my kids do that. And it's a6:29 losing proposition. First and foremost, we need to think accurately about ourselves because this is who God says that we are. We all know people think too highly of themselves. Right? It's6:41 called arrogance or pride. And you know, they kind of strut in. Have you seen my new shoes? You know, I was at Nordstrom's the other day. Or, You know, I just6:53 hate it when it's just, it's so busy this time of year in Cabo. You know? The Lexus dealership gave me such a hard time. I am just absolutely frustrated7:05 with, You know, I think I'm going to go with the Bentley next time. Now, it doesn't take long for us and by the way, those are our mild, funny illustrations. Believe me, we figured out how to do that spiritually with7:17 verses and posing just as well. But that would be too convicting, so I didn't want to go there. But we've all been around people that you right? The superiority and everything in you goes, I don't want to be around that7:28 person. They think too highly of themselves. See, actually, they're a scared little boy or a scared little girl that's afraid you won't like them, and they've learned that's how to hide. And then there's7:40 other people that, you know, they think too lowly of themselves. God could never use me. I'm worthless. I don't have any gifts. I know the Bible says there's gifts, but I know you know, like he went through the whole7:50 human rights and he got to me and goes, Oh, I ran out. I don't have any gifts. I don't have any value. If you knew where I came from, there's no hope for me. Now, get this. If you think too highly of yourself8:02 or too lowly of yourself, who are you thinking about? You. See, humility isn't thinking too high or too low. Humility isn't thinking of yourself at all. The apostle Paul would say, consider others8:14 as more important than yourself. It reminds me I haven't done a lot of this but if you've ever gone bowling sometimes I go bowling, not very often, like once every 3 or 4 years. And, you know, those guys on TV, they make8:25 it curve. So, you know, I'm going to try and make it curve. And I've done research on this. I can curve it into the left gutter. And just this as an experiment, how many pins, if you curve it into the left gutter, do you8:36 get? 0. Well, then I try and overcompensate, and I try and throw it to the right. And if it goes in the right gutter, how many pins do you get? See, it doesn't matter if you think too high8:48 or or if you think too low. You miss. Those are gutter balls. God commands by the way, this is a command. He commands you and he commands9:00 me to think accurately, clearly, biblically about who you really are. It starts with understanding that command and then it takes a9:12 journey and a process of renewing your mind because people and the media and the world has been telling you who you are your whole life. And you've got to break out of that. And you say, well, why is that so important?Your Place in God's Body 9:24 Because if you don't understand who you are, you'll never understand where you belong. Notice the very next verse, verses 4 and 5. It says, Just as each of us has 1 body speaking of the physical9:36 body and many members, like eyes and hands and feet, etc, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we, or many, form 1 body, and each member9:48 belongs to all the others. Now, in your notes, right above just as, I want you to write the word for, f o r. There's a little preposition in Greek that when it comes it means reason.10:01 And again, to smooth out translation sometimes, just as sounds good. But the reason he's saying the reason you must understand who you are and think10:13 accurately about you is for, just as the human body has many parts in order to have the same function, so we, who are many, are 1 body in Christ, and you fit.10:25 And if you didn't know you were an I, you would know where you fit. If you don't have a sober self assessment of you, you don't know where you fit. If you ask the average person, what are your top 3 strengths?10:39 What are your top 3 weaknesses? Oh, 3. I've got 9. But here's what he's saying. Imagine these fingers coming out like this are your strengths. God gives you strengths10:52 that build your confidence and allow you to understand you have a unique contribution to help other people. Now, we live in a world where we're not even supposed to have any weaknesses, and so we sort of avoid,11:04 lie, deny, pretend. But God gave you weaknesses to create dependency and humility so there's interdependency, so other people's strengths meet11:16 your weaknesses, so they do for you and in you what you couldn't do. So you need people. You know what that creates? Interdependency or humility, and it creates beauty. Your11:28 assignment is I want you to really think and pray about what are your top 3 strengths. Not what people think, what you think. What's God say? Maybe go to a few close people that know you well, that'll be honest.11:40 Some of us want to write strengths because we think it would make us a somebody. But what are your strengths? That's a journey. And then actually write down, what do you think your top 3 weaknesses are? And when you get11:51 those, what you understand is instead of all this energy of covering them and acting like you don't have them, you just realize those are invitations by the God who made you to let people come into your life and love you12:03 in ways that you desperately needed.12:08 You're listening to Living on the Edge, and Chip Ingram will continue today's program in just a minute. Today's message is part of Chip's series, God's dream for your life, and you can hear it anytime at12:20 living on the edge dot org. Whether you wanna revisit what you've heard today or pass it along to a friend, this message and hundreds more are available online. You'll also find small12:31 group resources and opportunities to help you live out God's dream for your life. It's all there at living on the edge dot org. Well, now here's Chip.12:42 I had 2 kids in college at 1 time, 2 kids in Christian schools, and, at that little window of time, I remember reading the paper, Santa Cruz was the most expensive place to live in America. More than12:54 Manhattan, more than San Francisco. And it was it was just crazy. And just trying to make it was just very difficult. And so, when something broke down in our house, calling13:06 the repairman wasn't an option. I didn't have any money to call the repairman. And there was an elder in our church, a very godly man, a retired school teacher, but he was a shop teacher. He could fix anything.13:18 And so when the dryer would go out, and, you know, we bought a really older home that had lots of repair, and when it rained, the rain came in through 1 window, and every time the dishwasher I didn't know why my wife had13:28 upset her so much but we just put towel under the dishwasher so it would catch the water, take out the dishes. It seemed to work fine to me, but she really didn't think that was a good plan. And so Dick would come over,13:37 and on my day off, about 60 percent of my day offs, Dick and I that's what I called it Dick and I would fix things. Which meant I drove to Home Depot with Dick, I bought the parts, and then I would13:49 kneel down next to Dick and hand him the tools and ask a few questions, and finally said, Chip, you're never going to understand this anyway, but it's okay. I learned more about being a man14:01 of God. He had grown kids, he was about 20 years older than me, about how to be a dad and how to be a pastor from Dick than probably anybody in that church.14:13 Why? Because I had a need. I mean, I I can't fix anything. I mean, I mean, I literally I can't fix anything. I mean, the14:25 iPad came out. I can hardly get around an iPad. I'm so untechnical. And, I mean, you can fall off a truck and use 1 of those. But that need created a14:37 relationship. What would happen if you came to grips with the real you, took off your mask of projection and holograms, and recognized that God would want to bring people into your14:49 life? And what if you would take away your false humility and realize some of you are really good at some things? Instead of going, well, you know, I don't want to say anything like I'm good at that, because they might14:57 think I'm trying to they might think you're just trying to love them. I'll tell you what, it's God's design. It's powerful. It's beautiful. It's amazing.15:10 What I just described can't happen unless you're relationally connected, and people know you, and you open up, and you take those baby steps of trust. Being in15:22 a small group will not make you deep in relationship, but it's the container in which happens most often where you really share your life and your heart. And so, who are you?Deploy Your Spiritual Gifts 15:34 You need to think accurately about yourself the way God sees you. Why? Because you have a role to fulfill. You have a role to fulfill. And you can't know what that role is unless you know15:46 who you really are. And third, then you say, well, what role is it? Where do I fit? Show me, God. He's gonna say, I've deposited in you a primary spiritual gift. Are you ready? A primary spiritual15:57 gift so that you can know. You can do a lot of different things, but I want you to take the lion's share of your energy in the body of Christ and focus here. Look what he says in verses 6 through 8. What are you supposed16:08 to do? He says, we have different gifts according to what? According to the grace given to us. So what they are, if we're given by God, there's no room for pride. Then he says, If a man's gift is prophecy, let him use it16:19 in the proportion of his faith. If it's serving in his service, if it's teaching in his teaching, if it's encouraging or counseling, let him encourage. If it's giving or contributing to the needs of others, let him give16:29 generously. If it's leadership, let him do it diligently. If it's showing mercy, let him do it cheerfully. Now, we could go through and we have a on the back of your notes, there's16:41 your divine design, and we can help you learn and discover what those gifts are and discover what yours are. The point of this passage is not explaining the gifts. What's the point? If you're gifted to teach16:53 no trick question what are you supposed to do teach if you're gifted to counsel and encourage what are you supposed to do counsel and encourage But come17:05 on. If you're gifted to lead, do it diligently. Right? The point is, there's a lot of things you could do. You are gifted and you have unique something to bring to the body of17:17 Christ. This is how you make a matrix of where to spend your time and life and energy and priorities. You don't have to be on every committee and help everything in the community and everything everywhere all the time.17:27 You need to have a matrix are these are my strengths, these are my weaknesses, primary spiritual gift, these are my priorities, this is a season of life that I'm in. Okay Lord, Line me up. And when you do that you17:38 discover more and more who you are and you'll discover that you deeply belong and you'll be doing what he made you to do. And so the practice here put very simply is to discover and deploy17:50 your spiritual gifts. Discover and deploy your spiritual gifts. You answer these questions by thinking accurately about yourself, getting relationally connected,18:02 discovering and deploying your spiritual gifts. And as you turn to the last page, I just I want to remind you, sometimes, you know, you can dig down into these questions. I just want to remind you, remember what JesusNever Forget: Valuable, Accepted, Significant 18:13 said? True spirituality. Don't get caught up in the r's or, you know, surrender to God, separate from the world, sober self assessment. Those are great. But all those are what? Those18:24 are just a profile so that you love God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength. You love others as the way you're learning to begin to appreciate and love you.18:38 And you'll never love you until you begin to remember and grasp how God sees you. Not how you see yourself, not how your mom saw you, not18:50 how your dad, who wasn't around, did or didn't see you, not how your peers see you. And so there's 3 things I want you never to forget. Okay? You can look up the verses. These are ones, if I was you, I would19:02 memorize. In fact, I have. I want you to never ever forget who you really are. God uniquely created you. You are eternally valuable.19:14 You are fearfully and wonderfully made. This passage will go on and talk about when you were in your mother's womb, you were being fashioned in the embryo by the creator of the world19:26 because he had a plan for you and he made you special just the way you are and he not only loves you, are you ready for this? God likes you. I meet people all the time that are convinced, oh, I think19:38 God loves me. I just don't think he likes me. He's proud of you. He sings over you. The second thing never forget is that God placed you in his family.19:50 You are unconditionally accepted. Ephesians 3, Paul prays, I pray that you might grasp beyond understanding the height and depth and length and breadth and know the20:02 love of Christ. He loves you. He loves you regardless of where you've been. He's regardless of what's happened to you. He loves you even no matter what's happened because of Christ's work on the20:14 cross, his death that paid and covered your sin. If you're a follower of Jesus, he's redeemed you, and he loves you, and he takes your sins as far as the east is from the west. You're the object of his affection. If no20:25 1 else cares about you, he does. And third, never forget that God gifted you to fulfill his purpose. You are irreplaceably significant. You're significant.20:37 You're his workmanship created in Christ Jesus. Ephesians 2 10 says, unto a good work that no 1 can uniquely do just like you. When20:49 you think accurately about yourself and it is hard work, it'll change you, it'll change your marriage. If you're a parent, it'll change your parenting. These are the kind of things that you do with your kids. These are21:01 the kind of things with all the pressures that you renew their mind, that you have bedtime and sit around the table. These are the kind of things you do with a roommate realizing that you need to be the right person, not21:10 find the right person. And when you get an accurate view of yourself, you're the most beautiful, attractive, winsome person on the face of the earth21:22 because there's no 1 like you.21:26 This is Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram, and we'll hear more from Chip in just a moment. What does God actually dream for your life? That's the heart of what this ministry has been exploring for more than21:38 30 years. Week after week, Living on the Edge brings practical, Biblical truth into homes, cars, and workplaces across America and around the world. Marriages are21:49 strengthened. Parents find real wisdom for raising their kids, and everyday believers discover what it truly looks like to walk closely with Jesus. You know, none of that happens without people who believe22:01 this mission is worth supporting. Every broadcast, every resource, and every message, like today's, exists because partners like you make it possible. Your monthly giving creates the kind22:13 of stability that lets us plan ahead and reach further. Your 1 time gifts meet immediate needs and open doors we never saw coming. Here's what sets Living on the Edge apart.22:25 Chip doesn't just teach scripture. He shows you how to live it out from Monday through Sunday. It's practical. It's biblical. And after 30 years, the fruit speaks for itself. We'd love for you to join22:37 us whether you become a monthly partner or make a single gift of any amount. You're not just supporting 1 program. You're investing in a legacy of biblical discipleship that's already touched lives22:49 across 3 decades and around the globe. To give, visit living on the edge dot org. On our mobile app, just click on the heart icon and follow the simple instructions. You can also call us23:01 right now at triple 8 3 3 3 6 0 0 3. 1 more thing, be sure to subscribe to the Living on the Edge podcast, where you can also find Chip's complete unedited messages23:12 from start to finish. Alright. Here's Chip with a final thought.23:17 As we close today's program, what I have to tell you that is most exciting is the connection between being separate from the world and serving in love and having a sober self assessment. This is23:29 the that I've done with multiple, multiple groups is when people discover, oh, this is who God made me. And when they get that little 3 by 5 card I talked about, and and they say, these are my strengths, and23:40 that's wonderful. And, you know, yes, I do have weaknesses, so God has people in my life. They invite people into their world like never before. And the23:49 other thing is they don't have23:50 to pose. You know, a lot of our conformity to the world, and we gotta look this way and act that way and drive this kind of a car and have a purse that has this design on it and and drop names and tell people this and24:01 that. All that is about, we don't really know who we are, and so we're trying to project this stuff. When you get a sober self assessment, I'm telling you, it not just frees you to be24:13 you, but but a lot of the temptations, a lot of the world that pulled on you, you're thinking to yourself, you know something? I don't need that anymore because the most beautiful person in the world, the most attractive24:24 person in the world is the 1 that God made. So can I encourage you? Thank God today for how he made you, and look in the mirror, and literally go ahead, do it out loud with no24:36 1 around, and look in the mirror and say, I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Thank you, Lord Jesus.24:43 Do you ever feel spiritually stuck? Tomorrow, Chip Ingram reveals the missing ingredient most Christians struggle with here on Living on the Edge.24:55 Today's program is produced and sponsored by Living on the Edge.In this video 0:00 Hiding from the Real You3:37 Think Soberly About Yourself9:22 Your Place in God's Body15:32 Deploy Your Spiritual Gifts18:05 Never Forget: Valuable, Accepted, Significant
Comments
Keep it kind. Comments are public.