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January 22, 2022 · 1 hr 13 min · Featured Sermons
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With Pastor Mark, it’s all about Jesus! He is a spiritual leader, prolific author, and compelling speaker, but at his core, he is a family man. Mark and his
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0:00 Thanks for listening to this sermon from pastor Mark Driscoll. For more free content such as sermons, study guides, daily devos, and more, visit real faith dot com.0:10 Well, howdy. Super excited to see you guys. We kick off brand new series today. Pray like Jesus. Really excited and honored to have you. Good news. You made it through 20 20. Congratulations. You did it. Bad0:22 news, 20 21 is pretty much the same. Amen? It's like the purge part 1 and the purge part 2. It's hard to pick which 1 was worse and and this is where this time between last0:34 year and what appears to be this year is the perfect time for this sermon series on prayer. Last year, it was prayer that god really used to supernaturally lead me, my family, and our church family.0:45 It was about this time last year and I know many of you are new and I was thinking, hey, everything's healthy. The economy is strong. You know, nobody's wearing a mask. We get to go outdoors. Crazy stuff. Remember the0:57 days? And, and I thought, you know, it's probably time to look at new real estate for the church and to take on some other, you know, more risky maybe opportunities. And I prayed, and God spoke to me and said, son, no.1:08 This something is gonna happen. He didn't tell me what. Probably because he loves me, and he didn't want me to be anxious in the meantime. And what God said was, no, there is going to be some changes coming. And this is1:19 not the time to take risks. This is not the time to buy real estate. You need to hunker down. You need to focus on the Scottsdale campus. And you need to make plans to do some facility and some technology upgrades.1:31 HVAC, sound, light, video, all of these things and I remember saying, lord, how can we do that? We meet every week. I don't know if you remember last year and so, the lord was like, trust me, son.1:42 The money will come if you obey and prepare. So, I told Grace and I told my kids and I told the team here at the church, alright, here's what we're going to do. We're just going to prepare for a bunch of work, and we're1:53 gonna multiply our effectiveness in Scottsdale. And then literally, we had everything sequenced. All of the construction, all of the technology, all of the HVAC, literally scheduled for the exact time2:05 that we had to close the church. So the time that we were closed, we had everything prepared. And I was like, Lord, how is this going to be paid for? All of the money came in supernaturally. It was God's supernatural2:15 provision. So last year, for most churches, was 1 of the hardest years they've ever had. 1 in 5 churches, 20 percent pray for them because we love them all. They're at risk of dying and closing this year. The average2:25 church is running 36 percent. We doubled last year. We ran 200 ish percent. I went to public school. So that's a rough number. But God was super gracious. And people ask, what's the secret? There was no2:37 secret. We prayed, and God directed our steps. It felt like every time we hit an intersection, God turned the light green just in time for us. I want that for you this year. I want you to learn how to pray2:49 to God. And part of prayer is listen to God. Because I don't know what the year holds, but I know the 1 who holds the year. And if we learned anything last year, it's that we cannot predict the future. So we need to talk2:58 to God and have him direct our steps into that future. That's part of prayer. The other thing that I'm really praying for you to learn in our time together in this series for this year is how to unburden. I3:10 believe for 20 20, for me personally, prayer was a lot about direction. This year, I believe it's a lot about unburdening. How many of you have sensed a little bit of burden lately? Right? Any of you have the Internet,3:21 watched the news, know that we had an election? Anybody feeling a little uncertain about the future? And what we're seeing is you can either be praying or rioting. Those are your answers, and those are your options.3:34 Riding is what happens when you're feeling the burden and you don't know what to do with it. Praying is what happens when you're feeling the burden and you know what to do with it. Give it to the God who can bear it3:44 because it's unbearable for you. I want this to be a year for you. And this is why we're starting this year together in the Pray Like Jesus series to unburden you and then for God to direct you to have an incredible3:55 year. Even if the world is falling down, I believe God has an opportunity for you to be rising up. And so let me talk a little bit about prayer to set it up. A prayer is simply communicating with God. And the the4:06 ultimate goal of prayer is building the relationship with God. God is a living God. God is a relational God. God is a personal God. And the way we speak to God is prayer. And when we listen to God, that's also prayer.4:18 Prayer includes speaking and listening. And prayer can be done in any number of postures. Sometimes, it's okay to get down on your knees and pray. I do this all the time. I tend to do this before every4:30 sermon. You could actually go face down just out of a posture of humility and surrender. Prayer is something you can do while sitting in a chair. So you could do that right now. Prayer is something that sometimes you4:40 just stand and we do this in worship and worship is a corporate act of prayer. It doesn't matter where you pray or how you pray or when you pray because ultimately, the key is this and this is going to be the big idea.4:52 God is a father, and he doesn't care where or how his kids enter into a conversation with him as long as they're building the relationship. Some of you grew up in religious environments. You got you got to be in church5:03 to pray. No, you don't. Well, you need to kneel to pray. No, you don't. When my kids were little, we've got 5 kids, and I'm a father, and the whole backdrop of this sermon series is the father heart of God. I didn't care5:14 what my kids wanted to do as long as it built our relationship. Hey, dad. Can we go out to ice cream? Answer. Yes. I believe in Jesus and ice cream. I will do both. Sometimes it'd be, dad, can we go out and play catch?5:25 We're a baseball family. Sure. Hey, dad. Can we go to the coffee shop and play cards? Okay. Hey, dad. Can we get in the car and just go for a drive and have just some talk time? Sure. Hey, dad, can we snuggle up and5:36 watch a movie? Sure. I don't care what we're doing as long as we're connecting. As long as you're talking to me and I'm talking to you and we're building our relationship and getting to know each other better, I really5:48 don't care what we're doing. I just love being with you. God is a father and prayer is talking to, listening to, connecting with your father and he really, quite frankly, is always happy to listen to6:00 you and he's always happy to talk to you. You can pray in the car, you can pray at work, you can pray at home, you can pray while you're doing the dishes, And if you're new to the valley, you do need to pray while you're6:10 driving. Just this wasn't in my notes, but please let people know that the left lane is for going fast. And and okay. Okay. And6:22 and that a turn signal is not an option package on a vehicle. It's necessary. Amen. Okay. So when it comes to talking about prayer, how many of you just be6:34 honest. If I say, how's your prayer life? You immediately feel guilty. Even non Christians think they should pray. Even irreligious people sense they should pray. I've never met anybody that said,6:46 I feel like I'm doing amazing at my prayer life, and I have no room for improvement. If they said that, my first thing would be, you need to pray about humility. Then ultimately, I've never met anyone who felt6:58 that their prayer life had arrived. So let me say a few things about prayer. I don't want to make you feel guilty. Number 1, prayer is not something you have to do. It's something you get to do. K?7:10 Talking to a parent who loves you is not something you have to do. It's something you get to do. That's the father heart of god. Prayer is not a burden giving duty. It should be a burden lifting delight. Prayer7:22 shouldn't be a burden. It should be where you bring your burden and hand it to God. Number 3, God doesn't need your prayers. You do. Somebody asked me that recently. Said, does God need my prayers? He doesn't. If you7:34 don't pray, He's still fine. God's not in heaven going, please fix it. Pray to me. He's doing fine either way. You're the 1 who needs the prayers. Okay? God doesn't need your prayers. You need your prayers. It's for your7:45 emotional, spiritual, mental health. Number 4, prayer is not telling God anything, but prayer is inviting God into everything. Some of you, you don't talk to God about things. You're like, I can't talk to Him about7:57 that. Let me let you know a secret. He knows. He knows. Not like God's in heaven going, I had no idea. And then they called me, and then they've got a boyfriend. God already8:09 knows. How many of you, you're a parent, you've got a child, you know what's going on with a child, and they're just not talking to you about it. But you're their parent, so you know. How are you doing? I'm doing fine.8:21 No, you're not. I know what's going on. You need to talk to me about it. Our father knows everything. He sees everything, And praying is not informing him. It's8:32 inviting him. It's inviting him. And number 5, prayer is less about moving God's hand, and prayer is more about God moving our heart. So that's when you're like, I told God what to do and He didn't do it. I'll just let8:44 you know. He's god. So, he's not really good at customer service. He doesn't take orders very well. He will take humble requests but he's not looking to be your assistant. He's looking8:56 to be your lord And so sometimes what we do, we will tell god what we want and what god is saying is, you're not here to tell me what to do. I'm here to change your heart so we can have a healthy relationship and then9:07 you can listen to me. K? And so ultimately, prayer is not as often about moving god's hand as god changing our heart. So, where to start with prayer? And I want to start with big lessons from9:18 little kids. Okay? And how many of you have got little kids? You got siblings? You got kids? You got grandkids? Let me say this. Pray for the little kids here at the Trinity Church. The last 4 months of last year, we9:29 added 9 28 little kids to the roster, which is amazing and awesome. And we're going to need to build a much larger classroom building. So thank you in advance for paying for that. All right.9:41 Don't laugh. That was a prophecy. Alright. Matthew 18 1 through 3. The disciples came to Jesus saying, who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven? Have you ever heard there's no such thing as a dumb question?9:55 This might be a candidate. Amen? Here's the king of kings, lord of lords, the maker of heaven and earth whose mom was a virgin and just went water skiing without a boat and they're like, which 1 of us is better? Not10:07 you. And calling to him a child. Isn't that interesting? He grabs a little kid. He put him in the midst of them and said, truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like10:18 children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. These men are sort of competitive religious leaders. And they want to know how do we become the greatest. And what I love about Jesus, He doesn't rebuke them, He10:29 redirects them. He doesn't rebuke their pride, He redirects them toward humility. And He says, you know, this kid doesn't have your attitude. You need to be humble and teachable and10:41 relational. And you need to be more concerned about how we're doing and less about how you're performing like this kid. Similarly, in Luke 18, this is 1 of the great verses of the10:53 New Testament that people tend to love. This is like the Jesus is like Santa at the mall. All the kids are coming to sit on his lap. K? Luke 18 15 through 17, they were bringing even11:05 infants, little tiny guys, to him that he might touch them. Can you see the picture? Moms are like, can you hold my baby? Jesus is like, I'll do that. Can you pray for him? I'll pray for him. Can you see Jesus,11:17 a healthy single man? Holding kids, kissing them on the head, laying hands, and praying over him. K? Let me say, Jesus is the perfect man. And I'll tell you what, men.11:29 If you're like Jesus, the safest place on earth for a child should be with you. Alright? These hands are for blessing, not beating. They are for loving, not harming. You know that11:40 Jesus is a safe, healthy man when women who have their firstborn baby have you ever seen a woman with her firstborn baby? She's a bit protective. She walks up and hands the baby11:52 to Jesus. You know what that means? She thinks that he is safer than her. K? Your child is safe in the hands of Jesus. And this is what we do even in prayer and dedication. We put our12:04 kids in the hands of Jesus. When the disciples saw it, they what? Rebuked them. You know what? Sometimes church leadership is like this. God is12:16 doing something, and they take a vote to stop it. If you've been in church, you know what I'm talking about. All the men get together. They're like, well, there's lots of children, and they're distracting Jesus. We need12:26 to stop this. Next thing you know, it'll be a movement. They'll just Jesus will just be praying over kids all the time. Then what? Yeah. What a whore that would be if all the children were loved and prayed for.12:38 We need to stop this immediately. You need to know that sometimes religious leaders get in the way of what Jesus is trying to do. K? And I don't say amen so quickly. I'm a religious leader. That's a little hurtful in my12:50 heart. Alright. But here's how the story goes. Jesus called to them to him saying, let the children come to me.' Jesus loves kids.13:02 And do not hinder them. Don't get in the way. For just such belongs what? The Kingdom of God. He said, you know what? Heaven is made for kids. Boy, that gives me hope for aborted, preborn,13:14 passed away, stillborn, child death. That gives me a lot of hope. Maybe a whole lot of people in heaven, Jesus, are going, I told you I had them, including the13:26 miscarriages that we suffered. Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it. Couple of things here. Number 1, the Bible says13:38 that adults should teach children. And number 2, the Bible also says that children have a lot to teach adults. Isn't it interesting? These religious leaders are13:49 arguing, and what Jesus says is you need to be learning. These kids know some things that you forgot. And it's not that we don't learn these things. It's sometimes when we become adults and we become religious, we14:01 become too serious and we forget the simplicity of what it means to just have a child like faith. That's my next point. God wants us to have not a childish faith, but a childlike faith. That's what He's saying. A14:12 childish faith is immature. A childlike faith is innocent. It's trusting. How many of you have seen a kid, and if you tell them something, they they tend to believe you. So you've to be careful what you tell your kid.14:25 So when Jesus says, you're going to raise from the dead, a child like faith says, awesome. Ultimately, Jesus wants us to come to Him with a child like faith.14:37 And so what I ultimately want to tell you is this, if you want to learn how to pray, don't look to religious people. The worst place to look how to pray is religious people.14:48 Here, the negative example were the religious leaders, and the positive example were the children. That ultimately, if you want to learn how to pray, don't look to religious people15:00 or leaders. Look to children who have a parent, but I would say in particular, a father who adores and cherishes them. If a dad is a really good dad and really loves15:12 their kid and they've a healthy relationship, just watch that relationship. For those of you who are dads, if you're a good dad, do you have to teach your children how to make requests? And if15:24 you've sat down and said, if you ever need anything, here's how you do it. They just sort of pick that up on their own. Amen? Hey, dad, I need ice cream and a pony and a bottle rocket. Pronto. Stat.15:36 Why? You'll see. They just they let you know. How many of you, if you're doing something very important, your kid doesn't care. They feel they're more important. They just butt right in. Have you raised that kid?15:48 It was like, hey, I'm in the middle of something like, I'm your kid. We have the same last name. I have your DNA. I always cut to the front of the line. I don't care. What happens if a child is loved? They just assume16:00 that they're a priority. They just run to make their requests known, and they feel just free to talk. And true or false, if the child is loved, sometimes the communication could be a bit emotional.16:12 They might cry. They might be scared. They're gonna be very they're gonna run to their dad. Here's where I'm at. Here's what I need. Here's what I feel. And ultimately, the healthiest way to learn about prayer is to16:24 look at a healthy relationship between a father and a child. And this is where the whole sermon series is going go, because God is a father and you're His child. Now, let me say what makes this hard.16:36 Number 1, we live in a world where there's not a lot of great dads. Or let me say this, there's not enough. There's not enough. Number 2, many of the16:48 examples that people are given are promulgated by what I would call a false gospel, a false hope of media. And that16:59 is that 40 percent of children tonight go to bed without a father. For the first time in the nation's history, the majority of children born to women ages 30 and under are born out of wedlock.17:11 They have no dad. So the average person, their experience is, at least for a season or for the duration of their life, no father whatsoever. And so there's something17:23 that the sociologists will call cultivation theory. Cultivation theory is that when you are perhaps not familiar with something, media cultivates for you17:35 a sense of what normal or reality is or should be. Okay? And so, if let's say you didn't have a dad or a good dad or you've not seen a lot of good dads.17:47 And let me say, if you're at the Trinity Church, you're in the right place. There is a high percentage of good men, godly men here. Not perfect men, but men in process. Our17:59 largest ministry is men's. And our men have the Father's heart, they're trying to grow to share the Father's heart with women and children. That's a big part of what we do. If you want to see that, join me on Wednesday18:11 night. But this issue of cultivation theory, let me share this with you. There was a sociological study that was done. It was published in the Journal of Psychology for Popular Media Culture, and I believe it might have18:23 been re published in the American Psychological Association Journal. It was from a researcher at West Virginia. And here's what it says, The study focused on father child interactions of TV fathers18:34 in popular situational comedies in the 2000s. So from 2000 to about 20 10, they decided, let's look at all the sitcoms and see what kind of dads there are, and what kind18:46 of view of fatherhood we are cultivating in the next generation. Yeah, not good. That was prophetic. You prophesied the future. They recorded 618:58 99 father child interactions across 10 situational comedies. Now, here's what's interesting. The data survey finds 99 percent of American households have at least 1 TV.19:10 I've read in another study that there are more TVs in America than people. And the average household has 3. Now you add to that tablets, computers and phones.19:23 The number 1 consumer of screen time are children ages 8 to 18, those most formative years. And the average home has a television on19:34 8.5 hours a day. The average 8 to 18 year old spends 8 hours a day consuming screen technology and media. They spend more time in19:46 front of a screen than the classroom, and now we've actually made the 2 1. And so what this means practically is if you are a person who takes their19:58 child to church every other week, which is a pretty regular churchgoer, and let's say the sermon is 30 minutes. And if you're new, that's not here. Okay? That's not here. But20:10 if the sermon is 30 minutes and you only go twice a month, your child is getting 1 hour of Bible teaching from the pulpit a month, and they are getting 180 hours of media consumption largely on television.20:22 It's 180 to 1. Now, here's what the data analysis looked at, all of the different sitcoms, and then they scored positive and negative interactions and demonstrations of fatherhood.20:34 And this may not shock you, but here's the first data point. Working class fathers. How many are the blue collar guys?20:46 That was my dad. My dad is Joe. He was a construction worker. He would get up every morning. He would fill his thermos with coffee. He would grab his tool belt. He would jump in his truck,20:57 and he would go to the job site to feed our family, of which I was the oldest of 5. That was my dad. It is my dad. My dad's watching. I love my dad with all my heart. My dad literally broke his back to feed 5 kids21:09 so my mom could stay home with us. K? I just wanna publicly honor my blue collar dad. And in addition, I worship a guy who had a blue collar dad. And he was blue collar.21:21 His name is Jesus. First 30 years of his life, he's doing construction. Here's what it says. Working class fathers, I. E. Fred Flintstone, Archie Bunker, Dan Connor from21:33 Roseanne, and Homer Simpson, have been shown to be failures who often need to be saved by their wives, in contrast to middle class fathers who are shown to be successful and21:45 hardworking. What they said is, of all the research, it's the blue collar fathers that are shown to be the most incompetent, the most bumbling. Ultimately, it's the mom, the kid, or the family pet who saves21:56 the day. The worst of the worst are the blue collar fathers who are biologically raising their own children. So the story is, if your dad is still22:08 living with you and goes to work in a blue collar job, you've got the worst possible father. You may ask, what was the best category of fathers? Well,22:20 the person who did this data analysis, they did a survey and a research study and then a report outside of this journal. It was gay fathers22:32 that scored the best. Gay fathers, they said in a separate interview, there was no record in any of the sitcoms that they watched with gay fathers where they said or22:44 did anything negative to their children. It was 100 percent positive portrayal. Compare that to Archie Bunker. Compare that to Roseanne. Compare that to Homer Simpson. Compare that to Fred Flintstone.22:56 And so what you're being told is, if your dad is still in your life and goes to work to feed you, you've got the worst case scenario. If you have a gay dad, you've hit the bonus round.23:08 Now, here's what I'm telling you is this. Many people don't have a father. We'll talk about it in a moment. They also have a father wound. In addition, if you grow up and you go to media, the portrayal of23:19 fatherhood is not going to be positive and it is certainly not going to be biblical. And so what this causes is it's hard for us to take big lessons from little kids23:31 because when we think of father, we don't think of god as father and we don't think in the biblical category of father. And so what it leads to is what I have often referred to as a father 1. I'll explain this23:43 to you. This here is the conclusion of the Old Testament. Your Bible's 2 parts. Old Testament, 39 books. New Testament, 27 books. Between the writing of this last chapter of the Old23:55 Testament and the coming of Jesus is 400 years. So imagine that you're on your deathbed. Right? I'm pastor. I've been at people's deathbed. You know what they say on their deathbed?24:08 Whatever is most important. As we always say, you save the best for last. Whatever God has to say through this prophet is going to need to carry the family of God for 400 years.24:20 Imagine that you're a man on your deathbed or a woman on your deathbed. You bring the family around. You're like, I'm gonna tell you something that you need to repeat for generations. This needs to carry the family for24:31 400 years. So they're waiting for Jesus to come. Question. What do you think would be on God's heart through the prophet's lips at the end? Here's what he24:42 says. Behold, I will send you the prophet. That is John the baptizer, Jesus' rural homeschooled eccentric cousin. He was. He lived on a diet of bugs and honey. He24:54 wore a Jedi robe, he lived in Jerome. He was an eccentric kid. He was. He was rural. Behold, I will send you the prophet before the great and awesome day of the Lord comes. Before the Lord Jesus comes,25:06 the precursor, the forerunner, will be this prophet John the Baptizer. And here's what he will do. He will turn the hearts of fathers to their children. 125:18 of the most important ministries, prophetic ministries, mine is a prophetic ministry. I speak to men all over the world. I have spoken to stadiums of men. 1 of the most important25:30 things of prophetic ministry is to get the hearts of the men and to have them connected to the Father Heart of God so that He can turn their hearts toward what? What's it say? Their children.25:43 Their children. Dads, let me tell you this. You don't need to get it perfect. Your children just need to know that you have the Father's heart for them. And the Father's heart is, I do love you. I am trying. It was my25:55 fault. I am sorry. Please let me fix it. Okay? When a child knows that their father's heart is for them, it's healing. He goes on to say,26:07 He will turn the hearts of fathers to their children and the hearts of children to their fathers. Who goes first? Ideally, it would be the fathers. Once the father's heart opens to the child,26:18 the child feels safe and their heart opens toward their father. Lest I come and strike the land with a decree of utter destruction. Some of your translations will say a curse. You know what he's saying? If you have a26:28 culture where men don't love their kids, then the result will be kids don't love their dad, and then the whole nation is cursed. We call that America. The leading cause of death last year and this year is not COVID, it's26:39 abortion. I'm not saying God can't forgive it, but I'm saying when the most dangerous place to be is in your mother's womb, the26:51 hearts of fathers are not toward children. And it's no surprise then that the hearts of children would not be toward fathers. And the result is we live in a nation that is27:02 cursed. What I'm going to say is really controversial, and I'll do it again next week if you're new. But what he's saying here is that curses have27:14 far less to do with witches, and they have far more to do with fathers. A lot of times we hear of a curse, and you're like, oh, I don't want a witch to curse me. It's more likely that a father would be the 1 to put a27:26 curse on you. We call this in the bible a generational curse. A generational curse. In addition, there are 3 kinds of fathers. There are physical27:37 fathers. This is the 1 who gives birth to you, your biological dad. There are also spiritual fathers. It can be pastors, mentors, leaders, and they introduce you to27:49 the Lord. So the Apostle Paul, he didn't seem to have any biological children. He calls Timothy, Titus, and Onesimus in the New Testament, my sons. John,28:01 in first, second, and third John, he talks about, My dear children. He's acting like a spiritual father. Paul tells the Corinthians, he says, You have many teachers. You don't have many28:13 fathers. Wait. I'll tell you what. Teachers have a hard job because fathers aren't doing theirs. He says, you have many teachers. You don't have many fathers. He said, I became your father through the preaching of the28:25 gospel. Your biological father causes you to be born. Your spiritual father is the 1 through whom God causes you to be born again. He brings you the message of Jesus. The third category28:36 is father figures. Coaches, mentors, grandfathers, big brothers. Maybe in the business world, it could be a boss or somebody who is a mentor. We have these28:48 3 categories of fathers. And what I am saying is that Let me say this too. This family systems analysis explains America.29:01 Do you know what the problem is in America right now? We can't find a good dad. Our nation is 1 big broken, dysfunctional, fighting family. And we just got presented with 2 options: a29:13 tough father or a tender father. And we're just like a divorced family. And one's like, I like the old dad, I like the new dad. And it's a war, my friends.29:26 And I'll tell you that God is not a tough or a tender father. He's a tough and a tender father. He's tender with the kids, and he's tough for the kids. He protects them from harm, but he provides love and emotion and29:37 presence for them. That right now, our country is 1 big broken, fractured family looking for a savior father. And I'm telling you, he is in heaven, not on29:48 earth. And that ultimately, the healing that is needed is not going to provided be provided by a mere man. It's only provided by Jesus the god man.30:00 And it's interesting because even in politics, we talk about those who began our country as our founding fathers. We use this language a lot. And so what a father wound is,30:12 is it's a hurt from a physical, spiritual, or other father. And let me say this as well. The lack of fathers in our country is what is pressing the next generation towards socialism.30:28 If you have a father, you realize, I've got protection, I've got discipline, I've got help, I've got a safety net. If you don't have a dad, you want the government to be your dad. The30:40 whole generation that is pushing towards socialism is the result of a father wound. They don't have dads, so they vote for government to be their new dad. Hey, just pay off all my debts. Take care of me. Protect30:51 me. Call it all a human right. There's a lot of other humans that never had that right. But ultimately, the brokenness in our culture can only happen when men receive the father31:03 heart of God, and God turns the hearts of fathers toward children, and then heals and turns the hearts of children to their father so that this curse that we live under can be removed.31:16 And the result are various kinds of father wounds. So I want to get into this. I'll share with you in a moment why. But just think about this. Here are some categories of father wounds. The missing31:28 in action man. This is not a dad who intended to leave you, but he's absent. He died. He got very sick. He got injured. He's gone. It's not that31:39 He doesn't want to be with you, it's that He's not there. The deadbeat dad, He doesn't care. He doesn't show up. He doesn't unburden. He's not generous. He's not31:51 helpful. He doesn't care. And you would think, when life hurts this bad, he'll make his entrance now. No. The addicted guy. He's so consumed32:03 by his addiction that he has no room for you. Drugs, alcohol, food, sex, gambling, whatever his thing is, he doesn't have any time, energy, or money left for you.32:15 The Mr. Nice Guy. He's very kind, he's very sweet, he's very nice. If you're his daughter, he doesn't protect you from harm. He gets run over at work, and a lot of people32:27 like him, but men don't respect him and they won't follow him. He's very nice, but sometimes he is the 1 who allows the harm. Mr. Nice Guy thinks this, I don't harm anyone.32:39 No, but your passivity and your cowardness allows others to do harm. Number 5, the selfish dad. He's so busy with his hobbies, his fishing, his hunting, his32:50 buddies, his events, his fantasy league. He has no time for you. He's got work. He's got hobbies. He's got stuff to do. The game's on. Could you just please be quiet?33:02 The party hardy pop. This is the guy, he's the life of the party. Everybody likes him. Nobody respects him. He is fun. Is the he has a good time. He's always got a33:14 joke. If you're throwing a party, he's there. If there's an event, he's going to be the star of the show. But the problem with this guy, he can't depend on him. So he thinks he's good at telling jokes. He doesn't know33:24 that he's the biggest joke of all. And he thinks, Man, everybody likes me. Yeah, but nobody respects you because nobody's following you. Just like a clown at a circus. Just because there are people there doesn't mean33:35 they're impressed with you. The domineering dad. Overbearing, domineering, loud, sometimes harsh religious. These are your military dads. These are your high performance dads.33:48 These are you. Suck it up, rub some dirt on it, do better, try harder. They're just pushing all the time. They do well in military, they do well in business, they do well in34:00 sports, they don't do well in relationships. That's why they're at work all the time. That's where they win. When it comes home to people, that's where they lose. The Mr. Nice guy, he wins at home and he loses at work.34:10 And then the good dad. The good dad and I didn't say the great dad because any dad will tell you, we've not yet met the great dad. Any honest dad would like, I hope, by God's grace, I'm kind of a good dad.34:23 And if you think you're a great dad, ask your kids, and then they'll correct that. Okay? And as our kids get older, I always gotta look at them and say, where have I failed? What do I need to own? How do I apologize?34:33 What did I blow? What did I miss? I do love you. I'm sure I made some mistakes. I'm sure I did. And I know some that I'm aware of, and there's others that I may not even be aware of. The good dad is not perfect, but34:45 he's present. The good dad doesn't get it all right, but he wants to. And the good dad says things like, I'm sorry. That's my burden, not yours. What can34:57 I give? How can I help? How can I bless? How can I add value to your life, not take energy from your life? That ultimately, we all have bearing kinds and degrees of35:08 father wounds. Now, a father wound is an unhealed hurt from a physical, spiritual, or other father. What a father wound does, it opens you up to an orphan spirit.35:21 Jesus says it this way in John fourteen:eight, I will not leave you as orphans. If you have a father wound, you have an orphan spirit. An orphan spirit is 1 of 2 things. You either feel lonely or needy. Lonely, you can35:32 be in a crowd, you can be loved, but something in you just feels like you're always out, not in. Or needy, some of you are gathering people because you need a family. You've got a35:44 wound. And you're trying to just create a family, and it's out of a woundedness. It's not a healthy place. It's a broken place. That's an orphan spirit. And then35:56 number 3, what happens is a father wound on Earth blocks your view of your father in Heaven. Your father in Heaven is very large, but your father on Earth is very near.36:08 And if the father wound is in front of you, it obstructs and blocks your view. It creates a soul equivalent of an eclipse, the inability to see your Heavenly Father.36:21 What happens out of this, our entire philosophical and religious ideologies. I'll give them to you. Let me say this.36:33 What I'm sharing with you is out of 25 years of Bible teaching. I was 19 years of age. I was walking in the woods. God spoke to me audibly. I didn't even know He did that. He said, Mary Grace, preach the Bible, train36:45 men, and plant churches. That's what I've been doing since I was 19. God spoke something else over my life that day. It was a prophetic word that I don't know if I've ever shared publicly, but he said, I've called you36:56 out from among many to lead men. The first half of my ministry, did that as a big brother. This half of my ministry, I do it as a big father. That's my hope and prayer and goal. Not to be a big brother, but to be a37:06 father. There was a prophecy over me before we started the Trinity Church from somebody who didn't even know me in a pastor's conference of 4000. And he said, Stand up, I have a word. I was like, Oh gosh, I37:18 don't like words from strangers in stadiums. I'm not a big fan. And he said, You've ministered as a brother. You're going to take a break. You're going come back and you're going to minister as a father. That's the37:30 season I'm entering into. I believe that this is the beginning of fulfillment of that prophetic ministry. And the way I see things is from the perspective of a father. And here's what I see.37:41 Atheism says, I have no father. It's a father 1. Agnosticism says, I may or may not have a father, but I'm not looking for him. He's not looking for me. I don't need to know him. I don't care. That's a37:53 father wound. Deism says, well, I have a dad. He's far away. He's not involved in my life. He doesn't care about me. That's a father wound. Deism is a father wound. Like the dad who walked out when you were38:05 little. You feel like God is like that. Because I'll tell you what, oftentimes our view of God, it's either a projection or a rejection of our view of our earthly father extrapolated out to the heavenly father. Islam is38:16 the fastest growing religion in the world at current rates because their fathers are having children and Christian fathers are not. It'll be the largest religion on earth by 2050. Their view of father is that he's cruel.38:27 He's mean. He works through imposition, not proposition. He's a bully. That's a father wound. And you know what's interesting is that men tend to father out of their view of God the Father. If you38:39 think God is a bully, you're not gonna be a good dad. Liberals tend to see God as a permissive dad. He buys my beer, lets me smoke weed, make my own38:50 decisions. And what he is, he's more like the idiot big brother. Some of you had a dad like that. He acted like the idiot big brother, not the wise father. He enabled you. He didn't lead you. That's the view of liberal,Show more
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Mark Driscoll
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