Skip to content GOD'S PLAN FOR SINGLES: MAXIMIZING YOUR FAITHFULNESS Oct 28 · 56 min ...more
GOD'S PLAN FOR SINGLES: MAXIMIZING YOUR FAITHFULNESS
October 28, 2024 · 56 min
godsplanforsinglesmaximizingyourfaithfulnessdrjeffschwarzentraubbravechurch
Series Families Fortified October 28, 2024 · 56 min · Families Fortified
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Pastor Jeff Schwarzentraub serves as president of Pastor Jeff Ministries, a national and global ministry designed to equip believers and challenge them to take
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Embracing Singleness with Faith 0:01 Well, good morning. Will you help me welcome our Colorado Springs Westminster and online campus that are worshiping with us today? Just wanna say thank you, for Thursday night. How many were here for the Seth0:13 Gruber event? Was that awesome? I I wanna give, not only was it a great night, I wanna give a special shout out to everybody that's part of the corps. It's the first time we've done an event like that, where from the0:24 parking lot, to the lobby, to passing out popcorn, to making people feel welcome, to all the different things. You did an awesome job, doing that. So give yourself some appreciation for, serving the Lord in0:36 that. That was great. As a reminder, as you heard in our service, we start 21 days of prayer today. Pray first, period. Make sure you pick up 1 of these wristbands in black or white to remind yourself during the season.0:47 We're gonna pray, fall more in love with Jesus, and specifically use this time to pray for the lost. So let's continue our, journey today with the Lord in our worship service as we open our hearts to prayer and get ready0:59 to receive his living and active word. Will you pray with me? Our father in heaven, we give you glory, honor, and praise for who you are because you and you alone deserve our best. You deserve all that we1:11 have. For you are the giver of life. You are the author and the perfecter of our faith. And Lord, we praise you and we honor you just because you're our God. And we thank you this morning, because we as a people believe1:23 that every time your word is faithfully and accurately proclaimed that you are speaking. And so our prayer this morning is speak Lord, for we are ready to hear. And so now for all those who have gathered, who desire to1:32 hear the Lord Jesus Christ, speak directly to you, who will believe what he says, and who will by faith put into practice what he shows you. Will you agree with me very loudly this morning by saying the word,1:43 amen. Amen. I wanna tell you this morning that you've been lied to. You've been lied to. You've been lied to by our culture. If you watch television, you've been lied to. If you listen to social media,1:55 you've been lied to. If you listen to our politicians, you've been lied to. And sometimes in churches that don't open up the Bible, you've been lied to. When it comes to this Families Fortified series, everything that2:06 we've been talking about from Genesis chapter 1 onward, about how God created human beings in his image, how he created us with 2 genders, how he designed and authored marriage between a man and woman till death do us2:18 part, how he is the author of children and the 1 who wants to propagate the world. Everything that he's designed is good, and we don't hear enough information about it. But 1 area that we2:29 certainly don't hear a lot of truth about is how God views singleness. How God views singles. Today I want to talk about singleness. I want to talk about what God's design2:41 is for that, and how to maximize your faithfulness as a single. And if you're here today, like, oh, you kidding me? We're gonna talk about singles. That's how every single person feels when we talk about marriage. We2:52 have a marriage, so when's that, what's up for me? Right? And I think we need to do better teaching on this, because we truly don't understand what God has to say. God designed you, first and3:04 foremost, as a single. You came out as a single. Until you get married, you're single. I was talking to our pastors this morning. I was going around, and there's a couple of guys that are still single, and I was asking3:13 1, you're still single, aren't you? He's like, well, you know, kind of. And what he meant by that is I'm close to getting engaged. And I'm like, no, no, no. If you're not married, you're single. So let me just be really3:23 clear on this teaching. You're either married or you're single. You're either single because you've never been married, or you're single now because you're widowed, or you're single now because you're divorced. You're3:34 either married or you're single. Today, I want to address singles. And the reason I think this is so important is so often when we teach in the church, we almost teach to singles as, I'm3:46 sorry. I mean, this week, just to prepare, I started Googling some things. I I Googled singles. I Googled Christian singles. I Googled, verses for Christian singles. I3:57 was so thoroughly depressed by what was popping up. Because if you look up Christian scriptures for singles, they're almost identical to the verses that you would give to somebody in hospice care.4:11 Do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink. Fear not, for the Lord is with you. I'm like, these people aren't dying. They're single. Right? And because we live in that victimization4:24 of singleness, and married people sometimes look at singles like, what's wrong with you? How come you're not married yet? And single people feel that look, and then they're like, hey, you wanna meet my friend? You wanna4:33 go out with this person? You wanna and they're like, no. Because if they're anything like you, I really don't want to meet them, but they don't have the courage to tell you that. Right? I mean, what is singleness?4:43 Singleness is important because that's how you were born, and if you can't maximize your singleness for the kingdom of God, then you can't enjoy marriage either. So if you are single, what would God have to4:55 say to you? I mean, 2 singles that I know that made a significant impact were Jesus Christ and the Apostle Paul. I I don't I don't hear them talking from a victimization standpoint. When5:06 I'm reading through the book of Philippians, I don't hear the Apostle Paul write, for me to live as a bride or to die is in vain. I mean, that's not what he says. He says, for me to live is Christ and to5:18 die is gain. As long as I have Jesus, he's the author and the perfecter of my faith. I have everything that I need. When Jesus prayed in the Garden of Gethsemane, he's not praying, father, please let this cup pass5:29 through me, and then bring me a wife, and let me get married and have kids, and then I'll go to the cross later, but I really want to be married. No. He came on purpose to honor his dad. If you cannot honor the5:40 father as a single, you certainly cannot do it in a committed marital relationship. So how do you make the most of your time? And there's some of you who are single here that would say, don't wanna get married. Some of5:51 you have been married and are single now and say, I don't wanna get married again. That's okay. So how do you maximize what it looks like for you to be a single? And some of you are here that are growing up that are6:00 young say, I definitely wanna get married someday. And some of you have grown up and you've gone through your twenties and now thirties and now you're 40. Like, I've been praying this for 20 years. Where's God right now?6:10 Because I wanna get married. I've been praying it for a long time. I got good news for you too. These principles that God has in his word apply to you today. And it's important that we understand what God wants for us so6:21 we can maximize our faithfulness as single. So to do this today, I want you to open up your Bibles to Deuteronomy. Deuteronomy chapter 31. We're gonna specifically focus on verse 8, but I wanna set up6:33 this text, and it's a really strange text that you would say. Why are you teaching from Deuteronomy chapter 31 verse 8 when it comes to singles? Here's why. Because I could take you to first Corinthians 7, and we could6:44 talk about that, and we'll reference that today. I could take you to first Corinthians 6 and talk about sexuality, and I've I've done teaching on that. You can go back and look at it. In 20 17, I did a whole teaching on6:53 it. But I believe that singles, you need a charge, and you need to hear from God as to how you're supposed to live presently, and what you can trust him for in the future. And this here is Moses's7:05 counsel to Joshua, as Moses, who's gonna be a hundred and 20 years old, is gonna leave Israel, and Joshua is gonna take the children of Israel into the promised land. And as he's commissioning Joshua before God7:17 and all the people of Israel, what we see from Moses is him saying to the people that God's promises continue to be true for all generations. And I want you to hear this because God's promises to you as a7:29 single or as a married are still true regardless of your age. They're still true regardless of your condition. And singles, if you'll put this into practice, what the Lord is showing you, I believe there's great fruit in7:41 it. So let me set up the passage and then we'll focus on verse 8. Deuteronomy 31 says, so Moses went and spoke these words to all Israel. And he said to them, I am 120 years old today. I am no longer able to7:52 come and go. And the Lord has said to me, you shall not cross this Jordan. It is the Lord your God who will cross ahead of you. He will destroy these nations before you and shall dispossess them. Joshua is the8:04 1 who will cross ahead of you just as the Lord has spoken. The Lord will do to them just as he did to Sihon and Og, the kings of the Amorites, into their land when he destroyed them. The Lord will deliver them up before8:16 you, and you shall do to them all according to the commandment which I have commanded you. Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or tremble at them, for the Lord your God is the 1 who8:27 goes with you. He will not fail you or forsake you. Then Moses called to Joshua and said to him in the sight of all Israel, be strong and courageous for you shall go with this people into the land which the Lord has8:38 sworn to give their fathers to give them, and you shall give it to them as an inheritance. So you see what's happening? Moses is now calling up Joshua. He's commissioning them. He said, everything I told you God was8:49 gonna do, he's still gonna do. It doesn't change even when I'm gone, because the word of God remains true. It's true even if you have a different pastor. It's true. Even if you walk into a different church. It's true.9:00 It's true. It's true. That God is faithful to all of his promises. Get that. Get that. And then he sums up everything he's been saying in verse 8, and this is where we're gonna spend our time today. And I believe9:11 singles, if you get this, it will give you great hope and joy in your life. It says, the lord is the 1 who goes ahead of you. He will be with you. He will not fail you or forsake you. Do9:22 not fear or be dismayed. Read it again. The lord is the 1 who goes ahead of you. He will be with you. He will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed. I wanna give you9:34 4 truths that you can lean into this morning that God can help you with. If you're single and you wanna get married, if you're single and you don't wanna get married, all of these apply. And oh, by the way, married9:44 people, the word of God is true. Whether you're single or married, So there'll be truth for you in this text. Amen? And the first is this, trust God's leading. Trust God's leading. The9:56 Lord is the 1 who goes ahead of you. Do you trust God leading your life? Do you trust him to guide you? He's the 1 who knit you together in your mother's10:08 womb. He's the 1 who gave you your gender. He's the 1 who said you're fearfully and wonderfully made. He's the 1 who set the times and the seasons. He's the 1 who gave you your parents. He's the 1 who put you into this10:17 earth the day that you came out. He's the 1 that knows when you're gonna die. He's the 1 that's orchestrated everything. Can you trust that God with every asset of your life? Singles, can you trust God for where he's10:29 leading you and where he's gonna take you? And can you believe this, that this God who loves you, who created you, who values you has your best interest? Can you look to him,10:41 and can you look to him alone? Matthew 6 33 says, seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you. Starts with God. It starts with going all10:53 in with the Lord Jesus Christ. If you want to get married and you're single, or if you wanna stay single and enjoy it to the full, you gotta go all in with Jesus Christ. You have to trust God's leading in every area of11:04 your life. That's that's where it starts. It it it doesn't start backwards. Well, if God gives me a spouse, then he gets my worship. No. No. No. He gets your worship first and foremost regardless of what he chooses to11:16 do. Amen? Do you trust his leading? Do you trust his leading? Because if you do, the enemy's gonna whisper in your ear, why you trust in him? If you go all in with Jesus, that's really gonna limit the playing field. If11:27 you do things God's way, that's really gonna limit the playing field. If you're in middle school or high school, and you're hearing that you should remain a virgin until you get married, and you choose to do that, that's11:37 gonna limit the playing field. That's gonna make you a square. That's No, no, no. You go all in with God, and he's got your back, and the God of the universe is for you. Here's the question, who could ever be against11:47 you? Amen? Hey, we read these scriptures in like Psalm 23. The Lord is my shepherd. He shall not want. He makes me lie down11:59 in green pastures. He leads me besides quiet waters. He restores my soul. He guides me in the paths of righteousness for his namesake. He's a provider. He's a good God. If you're trusting God's leading,12:11 he's the 1 that's gonna lead you to green grass, to still water. He he he cares about you. He he has your best interest at heart. He he's gonna guide you into the ways of all truth.12:22 He's gonna lead you in the way that is best for you. Do you trust God's leading? And here's the reality. Every time you take a step of faith with God, you're gonna hear the voice of the enemy saying, are you sure? Are12:34 you sure? Man, nobody else is taking that step. You're going alone on this 1. I don't know that God's gonna show up, and when it comes to the things of God in relationships, you've got to put God first. Because if you12:44 don't put God first as a single, you'll never put him first in your marriage. Put him first as a single. Trust him. He's a good God. He wants to lead you in the right way. There's things along the way. He's building into12:56 your life. He has a curriculum for you. And let me just point out this, in Psalm 84 verse 11. The scriptures say, no good thing will God withhold from those who walk uprightly.13:09 God, I want a husband. God, I want a wife. Here's a question. Here's a question. Is God first and foremost in your life? Are you walking in obedience to him? Are you doing things his way? Are you honoring him in what you13:20 do? There's a lot of times that God's not answering your prayer, not because he's unwilling or unable, but it's because you're living in sin and you're not doing it God's way, but then you're asking God to do something13:30 when you're not doing his way. And he's silent on those things. So singleness is a time to maximize your trust in the Lord and to do it his way. If this is how he wants you to live, do do you attend church? Are13:42 you serving faithfully? Are you honoring God with your resources? Are you honorable to your parents? Are you doing all the things that God would want you to do? Do you forgive others quickly when they hurt you? Are are13:53 you doing it his way where you can stand before the Lord and say, Lord, I don't know if there's something in my life. Search me and try me. See if there's any offensive way in me. Otherwise, Lord, I think I'm doing it14:02 your way, and I'm I'm asking for this thing. I'm asking for a wife. I'm asking for a husband, and it's a good thing. The Bible starts with a marriage. God created gender for the purpose of marriage, between a man and a14:14 woman till death do us part. And then God says in Genesis 2 that the husband and wife were together, and they were naked, and they felt no shame. God is the 1 that created intimacy. God is the 1 that created marriage.14:26 God is the 1 that created sexual fulfillment, and God says it is very very very good. So your desire for that's not a bad thing. It's just you have to trust God to lead you into14:38 that way. Is he leading you? When Jesus called his disciples, remember what he said in Matthew 4 19? Follow me. I'll make you fishers men. Are you following Jesus or you just give lip service to Jesus? Are are14:50 you trying to live Jesus's way where you're not living his way? Are you being repentant? And when you do that, then you can tell very quickly, do you want to get married or not? I I I can help you this morning. Though,15:00 it'll help set the trajectory for your life a little bit. Here's what first Corinthians chapter 7 says is, the Apostle Paul who is a single is writing and he said, now concerning the things about which you wrote,15:12 it is good for a man not to touch a woman. If you're single, you don't have rights to anybody else. Why? Because you're not in covenant with them, and they do not belong to you. So if you're15:24 single, here's your choice. Celibacy. That's your only choice. It's good for you to be single and not to be kissing on each other and touching on each other and all those different things.15:35 Why? Because you don't belong to each other, you belong to the the Lord, and that's a good thing if you're called to singleness. But if you're not called to singleness, it's not a good thing.15:47 Notice what he says next. He says in verse 2, but because of immoralities, each man is to have his own wife, and each woman is to have her own husband. And then he goes in great length talking about how in a marriage15:57 you're to sexually fulfill 1 another completely. So much so that the only time that there's not sexual fulfillment taking place in a marriage is when it's agreed upon by the husband and wife for the purpose of prayer and16:08 seeking the Lord, but then you come back together quickly so you're not tempted outside your marriage. It means that sexual intimacy in a marriage should be so good, you are so worn out you don't have time to look16:17 around. And God doesn't blush about that. He just doesn't blush. God created and designed sexuality. God said it was very very good, and God16:29 said it was so good that God had to create a container for it. You know, God wrote a whole book called the Song of Solomon on sexuality. I always wonder as a faithful preacher of the word, when I teach you the Song of16:40 Solomon, how am I gonna even get through chapter 1? You read this book? I mean, it starts out with this woman saying, oh, that he may kiss me with the kisses of his mouth, for his love is more delightful than wine. And16:50 then it starts to rapidly move from there. And I think that's 2 things Bible believing Christians don't like to talk about is kissing and drinking good wine and17:02 comparing the 2. But God has no problem blushing at that. God created that. God says it's good. I mean, just hear some of these verses in the Bible. I mean, in Proverbs chapter17:15 5, he talks about not being with the adulteress, not not going after somebody that's not your spouse, but he says in Proverbs 5 15, drink water from your own cistern and fresh water from your own well. That's a euphemism17:26 for sexual fulfillment in your own marriage. Should your springs be dispersed abroad, streams of living water in the street, let them be yours alone and not for strangers with you. Marriage sexuality is to be kept in17:38 the marriage. Notice what he says. He doesn't blush. Let your fountain be blessed and rejoice in the wife of your youth as a loving hind and graceful doe. Let her breasts satisfy you at all times. Be exhilarated with17:50 her love. And every junior high I was like, dude, where's that again? God doesn't blush. He says it's good, but here's the problem. In church18:02 sometimes the way we talk about sex is it's bad, it's bad, it's bad, it's bad, it's bad, it's bad, it's bad, it's so bad, don't don't don't don't stop, don't don't don't. Until you say I do, and then the pastor, it's18:11 good, and we can't flip the switch. God says the opposite. It's good. It's good. It's good. It's so good, and it's so sticky, and it's so permanent that if you don't have18:23 sexual fulfillment in the context of marriage, you're gonna get hurt. Because every other sin you sin, you sin outside the body, but sexual sin you sin against yourself. It's so powerful and sticky. I mean, the18:34 illustration would be like, if you take a piece of black construction paper and a piece of white construction paper, and you glue it together, and you let it sit for a week and then you decide, we're gonna pull that18:43 apart, the white construction paper would have black specks and the black construction paper would have white specks. And some of you that have engaged in sexual immorality outside of marriage know what that feels like.18:54 Where you're like, this hurts, and this is awful, and this is no good. Why? Because there's no such thing as sexual fulfillment outside of a Christian marriage. It doesn't exist because God created19:06 sex to fulfill 1 another. Sex is not about pleasing yourself. Sex is about pleasing your spouse, and the only way you can ever do that is in the context of marriage. That's why there's nobody19:18 anywhere, whether they give a TED talk, speak in Hollywood, Las Vegas, wherever, that outside of the marriage bed has ever had any sexual sexual fulfillment. And I'll tell you why. Because when you do it God's way and19:29 you're filled with the Holy Spirit, it's as if the Holy Spirit is like, I'm here. God's here. I'm cheering this on. This is like Holy Spirit worship filled sex, and it's good. And there's no guilt, and there's no shame.19:41 And God says, this is what's gonna bring the sticky to your marriage. Amen? Amen. Sex is good. It's not bad, but that's why God had to create a container for it. I think about this. When when Kim and I19:52 got married, we have what was called a registry. You know what a registry is? I say we. That's a loose term. She had a registry and we were getting married, so we had a registry. But you don't really register at Best Buy20:03 or for electronic goods. It use It's usually household goods, household items, towels, baskets, all sorts of different things that we apparently need. And 1 of the things that we registered20:15 for was China. China with the proper pattern that we apparently were really looking forward to having. And so20:27 people started sending us this. We had, like, a China plate and and a smaller plate that's like for salad and a saucer and a cup and something else, and they were all boxed really neat. And I remember we got married. We20:38 didn't have a lot of stuff. We didn't have a lot of boxes, which by the way is a beautiful thing. When you get married, you don't need to have a ton of money. You don't need to wait 40 years to get married. You get20:45 married as long as you have enough to take care of yourself. And so we had these boxes, and I remember we had a cardboard a card table we we pulled out to have our meals. I'm like, hey. Let's eat off of these. She's20:55 like, no way. And I'm like, why not? She's like, because they're too valuable. And I'm like, well, I'm pretty valuable. You know? And she's like, no. And then we went on to find out not only are they so valuable that21:07 they have to stay in a box, now she told me we needed to buy what was called a china cabinet. So it wasn't good enough just to have the China, now we had to get a container for the China. And that container21:19 has glass on the front, it has light on the top, and you put the dishes in so that when you have people come over and they're eating off ordinary plates, they can look through the China cabinet and wish that they were21:29 valuable. Right? And it took us over a decade to even eat off them once because they're so valuable. That's how God views sexuality in a21:41 marriage. He's not saying no. He's not saying your feelings are wrong. He's saying this is so powerful, and it's so good, and it's so transforming, and it's not just physical. It's spiritual. It's emotional.21:53 It's in every way connected that I only want you to have this in a marriage so that you can be fulfilled and not get hurt. Amen? Amen. So let me just say22:04 this. If you have had sex outside of marriage, I wanna tell you something. God's grace is willing to forgive you if you're repentant and you're willing to get right. He can cleanse you from the inside out and you22:16 can start fresh all over again right where you're at. Some of you, I need to say this, some of you didn't even have the opportunity to remain pure because things happened to you when you were a little22:28 girl or a little boy, and you had no control over that. And I wanna let you know this, God's grace is even greater than that sin that happened to you. And he can cleanse you from the inside out as well, and you can be22:39 pure and move forward as well. Amen? You need to know that. But here's the question, do you trust God's leading? Because if you don't trust God's leading, you're gonna listen to the world, and you're gonna feel like a22:50 victim, and you're gonna feel like how come everybody else and how come not me and why not this and all this different kind of stuff. And God wants you to know, no. I got you. I'll lead you. Let me say this to those23:02 of you that are living together or for those of you that aren't living together but you're sleeping together and you think it's good. God sees everything you're doing that's not good. And his judgment is on it, and23:10 before you sweat and run out of church, I want to tell you something. You just need to get right. Because sometimes, I mean, in a church our size, on 3 different campuses, and people watching online, like, what do I do?23:20 I'm freaking out right now. He's talking to me. I'm not talking to you. God's talking to you. And he's telling you that what you're doing is wrong, and just because it feels right, doesn't make it good. So what do you23:30 need to do? Here's what you do. Here's what you do. Today, you don't stay in the same house anymore. If you need a place to stay, come talk to me or 1 of our pastors. We'll figure out where you go. Well, who moves out?23:40 The guy does. Yeah. But it's my house. Then you shouldn't have brought her in in the first place. K? So move out. We'll get you some counseling. If you wanna get married, wouldn't it be cool, like, in a couple weeks, we23:51 do some counseling, have about 10 to 15 marriages that just took place right after service? Would you guys would you guys cheer for that? I mean, if you're shacking up and you plan on getting married, I mean, we'll24:03 provide the audience, we'll buy flowers, we already have videographers. I mean, we got it all right here. You can send your parents, they can come out and see it. We'll we'll just celebrate that with you. Take vows and24:14 be married. And if you don't wanna be married, then why are you continuing to live together? And and why do you go to brave and say, well, I'm a Christian and then sleep around? Like, stop it. That's what God's24:26 saying to you. Because he loves you too much. Not because he thinks you're a bad person, but he's got way more for you than how you're living. That's what he's saying. So trust his leading. Trust his24:38 guidance. I mean, I think it'd be really, really cool. I think it'd be really cool in the next couple weeks if we had several of you that haven't been doing it God's way, that say it's time for me to do it God's way, and24:47 repented, and got a little counseling, and then we celebrated with you here as God forms your marriage together. That'd be awesome. Amen? Trust his leading. He's got you. Don't believe the lie of the enemy that says it's24:58 never gonna happen for you. Hasn't happened yet. Why is it taking so long? Trust God's leading. Second is this, trust God's presence. Trust God's presence. It is the Lord who goes25:10 ahead of you. That's his leadership. He's he's way ahead of you. He he lives in eternity past and eternity future, and he dwells in the present, and he's he's guiding you, but trust his presence. Trust his presence.25:23 Notice what he says. He's the 1 who goes ahead of you. He will be with you. In the great commission, he says, I'll be with you always to the very end of the age. Hebrews 13 said, never will I leave you or25:35 forsake you. His his presence. In the Old Testament, when when God was on a person, it says the Lord was with him. What you want more than anything in your life and the intimacy that you're craving, it's not in the25:47 spouse, it's in the Lord Jesus Christ. It's his presence. That's what you want. You may think it's gonna be found in somebody else, but your spouse as great as your spouse is can't fulfill the presence of God in25:58 your life. And as a single, it gives you great opportunity to experience the presence of God. Anyone who's born again has the Holy Spirit of God resident in their life. And through praying and seeking his26:10 face, you can experience him more and more. That's why I'd encourage you during these 21 days of prayer, come to prayer meetings. When our church opens on the weekend, come to church. Find a place to get involved. Find a26:22 place to serve. Build community with people around you. Love the people around I mean, grow in his presence. He's with you. He's he's in you. And here's what I'd say. If you're not experiencing26:34 his presence as a single, you'll never experience his presence as a married person. And what will happen is you'll expect your spouse to be for you what only Jesus can be, and they'll never be what Jesus can be, and then26:44 you'll get dissatisfied with your spouse. Don't marry thinking somebody else can fulfill a hole that only Jesus Christ can fill. If you're not fulfilled as a single, I promise you you'll be doubly unfulfilled as a26:56 married person, and you'll crush your spouse with high levels of expectation that no human being could ever fulfill. Marriage is not about meeting the other person that can fulfill things in you that27:08 you couldn't fulfill in yourself. There's a complimentary relationship, but the whole Jerry Maguire you complete me garbage doesn't work. You know, the whole you had me at hello. I mean27:20 if we follow that whole story, they wouldn't be married today, and the reason you know that is all you have to do is watch Hollywood and Las Vegas with all their stuff. And if they were the pinnacle of what marriage is,27:29 everyone would still be married. Right? Marriage is not you complete me. Marriage is God has already completed me, and you're a partner with me so that together we can expand his kingdom for the Lord Jesus Christ glory.27:41 That's what it is. Amen? We have so much Hollywood and Las Vegas in our culture that we set ourselves up for failure.27:54 We set ourselves up for failure. Ladies think that there's just this guy out there that's like sitting around just waiting to rescue you, and he's this perfect person. He always says the right things, and he's strong,28:04 and he's chiseled, and he's awesome, and he's wealthy, and he's great, and he's got a castle, and he's bringing you home, and he's just gonna love you every day for your whole life, and then you can't find that guy28:15 because he doesn't exist. And guys are the same way, and guys read magazines and see different things, and watch women talk and watch all this stuff and airbrush things and then think, well, there's some gal out there28:25 that's just this and she doesn't exist either. So what can you do to experience God's presence? I would say pray, pray, pray, pray, pray, period. Experience his presence. Experience his presence. But I think singleness28:37 gives you time to do 3 things. And the first is this, use the time to live on mission. Jesus said before he sent it back into heaven, all authority in heaven and the earth has been given to me. Therefore, go make28:47 disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, Son, and the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey all that I've commanded you, and I'll be with you always to the very end of the age. Whether you're28:56 single or married, that's your mission. It's a busy mission. It's a time consuming mission. It's an all absorbing mission, and regardless of what you do for a living, that's your mission.29:08 Go all in with them. If you're single, guess what? You have more time to do that. You have more time to travel and take mission trips. You have more time to get involved in your neighborhood. You have more time to get29:16 involved downtown. You have more time to serve in your local church. You have more time to minister to people. You just have more time. So go all in with Jesus. Share the gospel with the lost. Disciple those that are29:26 growing up. Get in Bible studies. Learn the Word. Do all that. Go all in, and learn to live on mission. You need to be living on mission. And by the way, gals, if you meet a guy and he's not living on mission, or guys,29:37 you meet a gal and she's not living on mission, don't even think about dating them. Don't even think about dating them. You you can't be unequally yoked, and that doesn't mean just being Christian. But gals, some of you29:48 are such good ladies, and you drag that dude to Brave, who because he thinks you're hot will sit next to you and say, yeah, I kinda like that and kinda did this. But what was he doing30:00 before he got to Brave? And what's he doing now that he's at Brave? And how is he leading in the church? And how is he leading you? And where is he memorizing scripture? And how does he pray? And how does he serve? And30:11 who's he shared the gospel with? I don't know. If he's not doing it now, he won't do it after you're married. And the same goes for a guy. If you're dragging that girl to church and she's like, oh, that's kinda nice and30:22 that's kinda good. What's her background? What's her character? How's she been growing in the Lord? How's she been serving? What's she been doing? If you she's not living on mission, don't touch her. Give her time to30:32 grow in the Lord until she's doing that. Because you, at a bare minimum, need to love Jesus and both be on mission for Christ. As a bare minimum. But then use singlehood for this. Not only not only to30:44 live on mission, but use that time to discover your ministry. God made you unique. Every single 1 of us, he made unique. Not everybody that's saved that's on mission needs to be in full time vocational30:56 ministry as a pastor. Some are gonna be dentists. Some are gonna be teachers. Some some are gonna be social workers. Some There's a myriad of ways. How has God wired you, and what specifically has God called you in your31:08 life to do? How are you gonna do it? What's that look like? Being single gives you the opportunity, and gals I'm just telling you this. This is free of charge. You can thank me down the road. Don't marry a31:20 guy that doesn't know what he's called to do.31:24 I don't know. I mean, I might be this. I might be in sales. I might be a coach.31:27 I might be in ministry. We'll see what happens once we get married. Don't touch that brother. Because that brother has made you the focus of his life, and he's expecting you to make him happy, and he's not going31:37 anywhere. Don't mess with him. And gals, you need to know what you've been called to, and what you wanna be, and don't settle once you set your standard. I wanna be a mom. I wanna be31:49 a wife. I wanna homeschool my kids. I wanna work in the marketplace. This is what I want. I mean, I'm telling you I know this is what God has for me. Don't settle because, oh, he's so cute. Don't settle32:01 because, oh she's hot. No. You're on your mission and you know your ministry. And until you know that, then you're not ready to do the third, and that's when you can start doing. That's when you32:13 start praying for your mate. Pray that God brings you somebody that will help you fulfill the mission God has in the way that he's called you to fulfill that mission. And then God will bring that person along. You meet32:24 somebody that says, I know I'm called to be a pastor. I know I'm called to do this. This is where I'm going. I've been going there for 10 years. I'm I'm on this way. And you're like, that's what I wanna be involved with.32:32 He's going the right way. Go. Right? That that's when God brings people together. Pray for a mate not to satisfy your loneliness. Pray for a mate that's gonna partner with your32:43 mission and your ministry. And while you're single, you get the opportunity to find, how am I gonna live out my mission, and what's my unique way of doing that, and I'm praying for somebody that will come alongside of me32:53 and do it like this. Amen? That's why singlehood is an excellent time to maximize your faithfulness in the Lord. Lord, show me what I'm supposed to be doing. Show me how I'm supposed to be doing it. Lord, help me get33:05 involved in your church. Help me do the things you want because I wanna go your way. And while I'm getting satisfied in doing this, I want a husband or I want a wife that helps me be even better at doing these things33:16 that you've created me to do. Amen? You're not getting this anywhere else. I promise you. There's nobody in Hollywood teaching this stuff. God's word teaches this stuff. You want his presence. You wanna33:28 go after him. Live on mission, discover your ministry, and pray for your mate. Once you've done that, then here's what I would tell you to do. Trust God's ability. Trust God's33:39 ability. If you trust his leadership in your life and you trust his presence in your life, would you please for the sake of the Lord Jesus Christ, trust his ability? He says, the Lord is the 1 who goes ahead of you.33:51 That's his leadership. He will be with you. That's his presence. Notice his track record. He will not fail you or forsake you. You know what that means? God won't screw up. He won't34:03 mess this thing up. You wanna go after God? God's the 1 that designed you. God not only knows your desires, he knows what's gonna be the most satisfying to you internally. He knows exactly what you need.34:15 Can you trust his ability? Now because we're in church, most of you say, I totally do. I totally do. I totally do. I totally trust God. Here's why you trust him. Because God created the world in 6 literal days. Because34:25 God created humankind out of dust on the earth, and created a woman out of Adam's rib. That God is the 1 that designed marriage. That God's the 1 that designed how to have offspring.34:39 I mean, you think about it. I mean, he's the 1 that led Noah to build an ark. He's the 1 that flooded the world. He's the 1 that rescued humanity and kept 8 people alive. He led Moses to Egypt to save Israel. He helped34:49 David slay Goliath. He helped Elijah destroy the prophets of Baal. He led Joseph and Mary to raise the son of God, Jesus Christ in their home. He led Paul to share the gospel around the whole world. He can do all things.35:00 Ephesians 3 says he's able to do far more than we can ask or imagine according to his glorious power that's at work within us. That's the God we serve. That's who he is. He can do it all, but I don't know if he's ever35:10 gonna be able to bring me a mate. I don't know if he's that powerful. Like are you kidding me right now? That is a lie from the pit of hell.35:22 God created Eve from Adam's ribs. She met him. They got married the same day. Isaac met Rebekah who was serving water to all the camels. He married her the same day. When you're going after God in your mission35:34 and you know your unique ministry, and you're praying to God, and you're living obedient, he will bring the person along, and you won't even realize they're there. Because too often, here's what we're doing. We're35:44 looking for outward things. What's their degree? Are they attractive? Do they have And God's looking at the heart saying, this is a person that will build everything that I've designed you to have and all that kind of35:54 stuff. And that's what God wants you to do. He wants you to go after him. He wants you to trust his leading. He wants you to trust his presence. He wants you to trust his ability. I mean, think about it. He caused the36:05 sun to stand still. He parted the Red Sea. In the Jordan, he created the world in 6 literal days. He designed you in your mother's womb. Mary said, with God, all things are possible. And yet why do you still believe the36:15 lie you can't get married? Like like, what's going on there? What's going on there is the enemy's whispering in your ear, not for you. It's not happened yet. It's not happened now. Why you know, if God really loved you,36:26 he'd give you somebody. And and trust me, I heard all the lies. I heard all the lies. I got married at the age of 34. If somebody would have told me when I was a teenager, you're not getting married till you're 34,36:38 I would have cried. Man, it was a long time. And I remember, I mean, just I was being candid with you. I remember I was 30 years old. I was do I was officiating a wedding in Arkansas for 2 students in my youth group. He36:49 was 19. The bride was 23. And to officiate a wedding, it's not super complicated. You just read wrote material. You read vows. You say them back and forth. You announce that they're husband and wife. So I'm going throughShow more In this video 0:00 Embracing Singleness with Faith
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