Skip to content Being Around People—While Still Being Sane! - Part B Dec 29 · 26 min ...more
Being Around People—While Still Being Sane! - Part B
December 29, 2025 · 26 min
What’s the key to harmony in your relationships? Pastor Skip reveals why genuine humility transforms how you treat others—and points them to Jesus.
Series Connect with Skip Heitzig Podcast December 29, 2025 · 26 min · Connect with Skip Heitzig Podcast
What’s the key to harmony in your relationships? Pastor Skip reveals why genuine humility transforms how you treat others—and points them to Jesus. ...more Show the full description Show less What’s the key to harmony in your relationships? Pastor Skip reveals why genuine humility transforms how you treat others—and points them to Jesus.
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Skip Heitzig ministers to over 15,000 people as senior pastor of Calvary Church in Albuquerque. He reaches out to thousands across the nation and throughout the
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0:01 This is Connect with Skip Heitzig. Thanks for joining us today. Here at Connect with Skip, our mission is to help you know God's word and apply it to your life through clear, practical bible teaching and real0:12 encouragement every day. And if you'd like to keep growing in your walk with Jesus, sign up for pastor Skip's free weekly devotional. You'll receive biblical insight, teaching highlights, and exclusive resource offers0:24 straight to your inbox. Everything designed to help you stay strong in your faith. It only takes a minute to sign up. Go to connect with skip dot com and join the list today. That's connect with skip dot0:35 com. Now let's dive into today's teaching from pastor Skip Heitzig.0:40 If you want the resistance of God in your life, be prideful. If you want the favor of God in your life, grace of God in your life, be humble. Lowliness of mind,0:52 lowliness of mind. Now here's an interesting little addendum to that. 2000 years ago, when this was written, there was the Roman culture, but then there1:04 was the Greek culture. They had been around a little longer. In the Greek culture, lowliness of mind or humility was not a virtue to be desired. It was a bad1:16 quality to be dispensed with, pushed away. The Greeks really thought they were superior to everybody else in the world.1:27 Everybody who wasn't a Greek was called by them a barbarian. And slaves, the ones who grovel in the dirt, grovel on the ground, those were the ones they1:39 said were humble minded. So when the Greeks would take over somebody in a battle, they would turn those into humble minded people, make them into slaves.1:51 Isn't it interesting the very quality that the Greeks thought was so bad, the Bible says is so good? And the Bible pushes up and extols and says, you ought to do2:03 that. You want to know why? Because that's what Jesus did. Jesus was humble. Jesus was lowly minded.2:15 I want you to see it. If you go to verse 5, and I'm taking a little thunder away from next week, that's where we'll be. But look at it. Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus, who,2:27 being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God. But he made himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant and coming in the likeness of man. And being found2:39 in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death on the2:50 cross. So let me sum this little point up by saying this. Humility is the grace that becomes the grease3:02 so that the gears of relationship can turn smoothly. Humility is the grace that becomes the grease so that the gears of relationships can turn3:14 smoothly. Do be humble. Second on the do list, do be respectful. You'll notice that Paul says, Let nothing be done through3:26 selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind, let each esteem others better than himself. Now he qualifies that in the next verse. Let each of you look out, be on the lookout,3:38 not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. I like the way the Message translation renders this: Forget yourselves long enough to3:50 lend a helping hand. Here's how it works. Let's say we're together. If when we're together, I always put myself first and4:02 you always put yourself first, we're going to collide. We're going to have problems. But if when we're together, I put you first and you put me first, we're going to get along just fine. We're going to be preferring 14:12 another. We're going to be esteeming 1 another. Our relationship is going to flourish. I heard about a youth pastor who went to a Special Olympics for children, and these handicapped4:24 kids will compete in different events. Well, it was the 2 20 yard dash. And the race began, and a boy named Andrew took the lead. He was 50 yards out in front of everybody else4:36 in the pack and kept gaining more and more as he went, until he turned the final round for that last little leg of his lap. As he was making the4:48 final turn, little Andrew, ahead of everybody else, looked down on the track and noticed his good friend had fallen in the race and was hurt on the ground. At that point, Andrew stopped,5:02 and he looked at the finish line, and he looked down at his friend. And everybody in the crowd said, Run, Andrew, run! But Andrew didn't run. Andrew walked5:13 over to his friend, hurt on the ground while people passed him by, lifted up his friend more people passed him by and took his hand, took his arm, and walked with his friend and came in dead5:25 last. Now, everybody understands. They understood what was going on, they applauded for him. But he came in last, walking his friend just so he could finish at5:36 all. What Andrew discovered is what a lot of us so often forget, that is that sometimes finishing first isn't the most5:48 important thing. Helping somebody finish at all is. I bet you've heard the name Leonard Bernstein. You've heard of him because he6:00 was really the first American conductor and musician that achieved worldwide acclaim on his level. He was a conductor. He was director of an orchestra. In fact, he was a conductor of the New York Philharmonic6:12 Orchestra. He wrote the musical score for many Broadway plays. If I mentioned of all, you'd be familiar with him. But Leonard Bernstein was once asked 1 day, what is the hardest6:24 instrument to play? To which he said, the second fiddle, the second fiddle. And he explained, he said, I can get plenty of first violinists, but6:36 to find somebody who can play the second fiddle with enthusiasm, that is a problem. That is a problem. So let each6:47 esteem others. Let's look out for others' interests. Now, as I say these words and as I study this, I thought of something.6:59 I thought, this is a good point and this preaches well, But it doesn't practice easy. I mean, you and I are going to go out in a few minutes, go out and get busy with our7:11 lives and do other stuff. And chances are we're all going to forget this, even if we take a few notes, because esteeming other people greater than ourselves is so7:22 against our human nature. How are we even going to pull that off? I mean, who does that? Who lives that way? Where we esteem others better, we're always looking out for other people. I mean,7:34 it's good. It's what we're commanded to do. But how do we do that? It's awfully difficult to do. It's extremely difficult. How do we do it? Let me give you a little help, a little hint of what might be7:46 helpful. The 1 person in all the world that you know better than any other person is whom? Who do you know better? Yourself. You know you better. You7:58 know how you think. You know what you're tempted by. You know what you like and what you hate. You know what you really feel like, even though you might look good on the outside. You know who you are on the inside. So8:09 I'm looking at Joel. You're all beautiful. You look good. You have Bibles. Your hair is done nicely. Most of you. Just kidding. Y'all look good.8:22 But I don't really know you. Now, I know me. I know me, and I know what I'm made of. And I know my failures, and I know my temptations, and I know my own crud and my own junk. So if I8:34 approach people while I'm cognizant of my own shortcomings, failures, and sin, I'm going to approach people differently. I'm going to approach8:46 people humbly. Because here's why. Based on firsthand experience only, who's the worst person you know? You. You are the worst person in the world that you know of. And I8:58 am the worst person in the world that I know of. I'm the worst. And so when I approach people cognizant of my own baggage, my own sin, I'll approach9:10 them differently. And that is exactly what Paul did. In the New Testament, he writes things like this, I am the least of all9:21 the apostles, and I am not even worthy to be called an apostle. Now, I think, Paul, you're like the greatest dude ever. You're like the greatest Christian I know of, because I'm the least of the apostles, not9:33 even worthy to be called an apostle. And then he writes in another place, I am the least of all the saints because I persecuted the church of God. He's approaching them,9:45 carrying what he knows about himself, and as he does, that deflated him. That's how you can help esteem others better than yourself. So don't be selfish. Don't be prideful.9:57 Do be humble. Do be respectful. Those are the basics of great relationships. Those are the dos and don'ts. Now, let's look at the first 2 verses and consider the basis of it.10:09 It's the why for all the what that we just covered. And here's the first reason, The reason that we should be humble and not prideful, the10:21 reason we should esteem others better is here's the reason, number 1, because the world won't provide that. What's the first word in verse 1 of chapter 2? What's the first word? Shout it out. What10:33 is it? Therefore. Now, who begins a chapter with that word? I mean, the first conversation you had this morning with your spouse or your child or parent or whatever, the first thing, did you10:45 say, therefore? You don't begin the day that way. Therefore connects a previous statement and brings it into the present tense. You say10:57 therefore when you're talking about something and you want to use that as a reference for why you should do something now. So he begins with a therefore, and we need to find out what it's there for.11:09 So we go back to verse 27, where we were last time. Chapter 1, verse 27, Only let your conduct be worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or I'm11:21 absent, I may hear of your affairs that you stand fast in 1 spirit with 1 mind, striving together for the faith of the gospel and not in any way terrified by your11:32 enemies, your adversaries, which is to them a proof of perdition, but to you of salvation in that from God. For to you it has been granted on behalf of Christ not only to believe in11:44 Him, but also to suffer for His sake, having the same conflict which you saw in me and now hear is in me.11:54 You're listening to Connect with Skip Heitzig. As 20 25 comes to a close, generous support from friends like you is vital to keep Connect with Skip Heitzig strong in the year ahead so more people can hear God's word12:06 and find real hope in Jesus. Your year end gift today helps reach even more hearts with verse by verse teaching and resources that connect people with God's love. To thank you for your generous gift of12:18 50 dollars or more, we'll send you pastor Skip's new resource, the daily God journal, along with the digital companion devotional, the daily God book. These resources will help you align your heart with12:30 God's, let go of anxiety, and grow in steady faith through his word each day. So give your year end gift today at connect with skip dot com slash offer or call 80912:42 2 2 18 88. Now let's get back to today's teaching.12:47 Therefore, in other words, here's what Paul is saying. You and Philippi are already suffering because of all of the selfishness12:58 of the unbelieving world around you who hate the gospel message. And they are attacking you, and they are persecuting you, and you are experiencing that conflict.13:10 So the people of this world are consumed with their own agendas, their own desires. Paul is saying, don't add to that. Don't add to that. Since the world is persecuting13:22 the church, the church shouldn't persecute the church. You see, Jesus said this, In this world you will have tribulation, but be of good cheer. I have13:34 overcome the world. This is the reason it is so awkward when Christians fight each other, because we're copying the world. It's the world that persecutes us. Let's13:46 not add to that. Paul's whole point in the therefore is since selfishness is all around you, it certainly shouldn't be among you.13:57 Therefore. So reason number 1, the basis of these great relationships is because the world will not provide it, and the church should. Number 2,14:10 because you belong to Christ. You should be humble with other people because you are a Christian. And so he says, If therefore there is any consolation14:21 in Christ. Now, you see the little word if? It could be better translated since, Because the idea is if and it's true, or14:33 since it is true, since you are consoled by belonging to Christ, right? You belong to Christ. Philippians one:one says the Philippians14:45 are in Christ Jesus. You're in Christ Jesus. He loves you. He forgave you. He washed your sins away. He promised you heaven. 1 translation puts it this way, if you've gotten14:57 anything at all out of following Christ, then you ought to be humble. Then you ought to esteem others better than yourself. So here's the deal.15:10 I can get along with you even though you're imperfect. You can get along with me even though I know I am so imperfect. You know why? Because Jesus can get along with all of us, and15:22 we're all imperfect. That's the idea of this thought. So because the world won't provide it because you belong to Christ. There's a third reason:15:34 Because his love is the catalyst. Because His love is the catalyst. Please notice it. If there is any consolation in Christ, if there is any15:46 comfort of love whose love? Well, he spoke about Christ a few words back, so this is Christ's love for us. In other words,15:58 if Jesus loving you has made any difference at all in your life, then it'll show up in your humility, which, by the way, brings up a good16:09 question. What difference has Jesus loving you made in your life? It's a good question to think about. What difference has all16:21 the love that Jesus has given your way, what difference has it made in your life? Has it made you more loving? John 3 16, For God so loved the world that He gave.16:33 Has His love for you made you more giving, more loving? So that's the basis of our relationship. I can accept you because Jesus has accepted us.16:45 I heard about a lady. She works in a nursing home. And she has made it her mission to sit with people who are dying if there is no family member present.16:58 She feels that life is sacred, a gift from God, and she believes that nobody should die alone. And she wants to demonstrate that love for the dying so that they leave the world in17:10 the presence of somebody who cares and loves them. That's powerful. So if Jesus is in me, then His love will come through me.17:23 And there's a fourth and a final reason, because we're a spiritual family. In verse 1 again, if there's any consolation in Christ, if there's any comfort of love, here it is, if there's17:35 any fellowship of the Spirit, and then he amplifies that, if any affection and mercy. Now, in Philippi, I mentioned that things were not17:47 perfect. They weren't. There were problems that they were experiencing. There were 2 dividing forces in Philippi that are true of every single church.18:00 First of all, there were false teachers on the outside. Second, there were fighting members on the inside. The false teachers will be discussed in chapter18:12 3, verses 1 and 2. Paul calls them dogs and evil workers. It's going to be a lot of fun when we get to chapter 3. Paul's just going to of come unglued. Then we get18:24 to chapter 4, and we discover the fighting members. There's 2 gals, 1 named Yodia, the other named Syntyche. These 2 gals in the church at Philippi have gotten a lot of people18:35 on their side, and they're creating a division, a party spirit. So the fellowship is being hurt. It's always being hurt when that happens.18:47 Now here's the deal. There's always pressure from the outside for the church, always. Every church, every place in the world, every generation, for the last 2000 years, the world18:59 has always been against the church. Unbelievers will always mock Christians' belief. Unbelievers will always challenge our faith. But if that is compounded when19:11 our own spiritual family is dysfunctional, it makes matters much worse. So here's Paul's point. We are a fellowship of the19:23 Spirit. We're in Christ, so we're related by blood. His blood has washed all of us. We're a fellowship in the Spirit. So the same Holy Spirit that lives in me is the same Holy Spirit that19:35 lives in you. As Paul said in 1 Corinthians 12, by 1 spirit we are all baptized into 1 body. We have all heard of reports of families19:47 who quarrel amongst themselves until somebody from the outside attacks the family. Then they all somehow galvanize together because don't you say that about my19:58 mom or my brother? And they'll resolve the conflict to fight the greater conflict. I just want you to know that everybody needs a family. Everybody needs a20:10 group where they can be loved and accepted and taught and held accountable. So to sum it all up, be humble, be helpful,20:22 be noble for the sake of the Church of Jesus Christ, which he purchased with his own blood. He did20:34 it. It's his. It's not ours. It's his. Now, if that were to happen in Philippi, that would just push Paul's joy over the top. Look what he says in verse 2. Fulfill my20:46 joy by being like minded, having the same love, being of 1 accord, of 1 mind. That's interesting. Paul already said he was20:58 joyful no matter what. Paul already said, you can lock me in prison. I'm joyful. You can beat me up. I'm joyful because my joy is in the Lord. You can have people talk smack about me and try21:10 to slur my reputation around town. I'm joyful anyway. But now he says, but here's a way I could actually be more joyful. Fulfill my joy or complete21:21 my joy. So Paul is saying, man, if you guys were humble with each other and you esteemed others better than you esteemed yourself, that would be the icing on the21:33 cake for me. Man, that would be the cherry in the Coke. That would be the whipped cream on the apple pie. That would fulfill, that would complete my joy.21:45 By the way, if we were to live that way, you know who else would be really, really, really, really joyful? You would be. We all would be. All of us would21:57 be. You've heard me say it before, that the more you do as you please, the less you are pleased with what you do. Think about that statement. The more you22:09 live as you please, the less you will be pleased with what you if you live for self, if it's all about you and your agenda and your comfort and you being happy, you22:21 getting your way, you will become a miserable person. I'm going to close with an illustration of that, and I will close. It's by Bernard Rimland. Bernie22:33 was the director of the Institute for Child Behavior Research. A study. And at the end of the study, he concluded the happiest people in the world are the humblest people in the world. So he did22:45 a study. I'll read it to you. Each person in the study involved was asked to list 10 people that he knew best and label them happy or22:56 unhappy. So you think of 10 people you know and label which 1, happy, unhappy, unhappy, unhappy, happy, happy. You do that with 10 people. Then you go through the list again and23:08 label each 1 as selfish or unselfish, using the following definition of selfishness. Here's his definition, and I'm quoting. A stable tendency to devote one's time23:20 and resources to one's own interests and welfare and unwillingness to inconvenience oneself or others, close quote. In23:32 categorizing the results, Remlin found that all of the people labeled happy were also labeled unselfish. And he wrote, and I'm23:43 quoting, Those whose activities are devoted to bringing themselves happiness are far less likely to be happy than those whose efforts are devoted to making others happy.23:56 And then he concluded with a remark that I thought you would find interesting. He said, Do unto others as you would have others do unto you.24:09 Now, who said those words? Jesus said those words in the Sermon on the Mount. He had to go through a whole study to figure that out. And he found it out. And he said, do unto others as you would have others do unto you.24:21 So listen, the quickest road to joy is Humility Boulevard. The quickest road to unhappiness is the freeway of self. And if you24:33 get on that freeway of self, you know what you're going to discover? It's packed. It's bumper to bumper. There's people who are nasty. They'll give you gestures. They'll cuss you out. And there's a lot of people on it.24:43 You get on Humble Boulevard. It's pretty lonely out there. It's the quickest road to joy.24:52 Thanks for listening to Connect with Skip Heitzig. Before you go, don't miss your opportunity to request the Daily God Journal along with the companion digital devotional, The Daily God Book. These resources25:04 are our thanks for your generous year end gift of 50 dollars or more to help connect with Skip Heitzig finish 20 25 strong and reach more people with the truth of God's word in the year ahead. Call25:16 809 2 2 18 88, or go to connect with Skip dot com slash offer. Thanks for spending time with us today, and we'll see you next time on connect with Skip Heitzig.25:49 Connect with Skip Heitzig is a presentation of Connection Communications, connecting you to God's never changing truth in ever changing times.
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