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September 8, 2025 · 50 min · Adam Mesa Sermons
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492K followers
Adam Mesa is Lead Pastor of Patria Church and speaks to a congregation of 12,000 about how the gospel of Jesus Christ brings purpose to every life. Patria
492K followers
Fatherless Culture Exposed 0:01 Thank you so much to all those who consider Patriot your home church and partner with us financially. It's because of you we're able to do some incredible things within the ministry, whether it be ministering, doing0:12 counseling families and marriages, or whether it be posting baptisms where everybody gets a shirt and we have change of clothes for people that get impromptu. You know, we got to fill all the pools and everything like0:24 that. All of that costs. And we don't get free money or anything like that from the government. Everything that you see when you walk around Patriot, any blade of grass that's been cut, any diaper that's been given to0:36 a child whose mother forgot their diapers, any snacks that are given, anything, any resource that's given, it's all because you provide for that financially. We feed thousands of families every Saturday at our0:48 generosity center down the street. That is because of your generosity, and so I thank you that when you give, you can just walk around and see that it's in good soil, and it goes to good soil. And so, I thank you so1:00 much for that. This is Father's Day weekend, and it's so incredible to see so many families that are out. Today, I want to share a couple things as we jump into the Father's Day message. Today what we wanted1:12 to do over this weekend is kind of do a little bit of ministry to the fathers. Ministry to everybody, whether you've had a father in your life or you haven't had an active father in your life. The thing about Mother's1:23 Day is Mother's Day is often celebrated because for the most part, everybody has had a mother. So everybody gets excited about Father's Day. But people don't often get excited about Father's Day, because not everybody1:35 has a father. Or not everyone has had an active father in their life in some type of way. And so when Father's Day is talked about, some get excited, some are able to send texts about how much their dad or grandfather1:47 means to them, and others, there's no text that gets sound out. There's no message that gets sent. And so I want to be able to encourage you today through God's word about how God sees you where you're at, but also for1:58 the men where God's got some encouragement for you today to continue to continue to be the man of God that God has called you to be. And so, for the past couple months, I've known that we were gonna do a message of sorts2:10 of what we're gonna do today specifically. And so the past couple months, I've been working on a small book for men. It's for all types of men. It's for young men, it's for older men, it's for men that are in2:22 a season of parenting, a season of grandfathering, or in a single season. It's called The Anatomy of a Godly Man, and it talks about 10 pillars of a godly man. And2:34 today for our men, for Father's Day, we're gonna give it away digitally completely for free. And so, it's something we want to gift all the men with. It's a short read book, but I but I think it's going to radically2:46 impact your life. And so the way you can get your hands on it, because you got to download it, is if you just go to adamessa dot org, just put your email, and an email's going to get sent to you, and the book is gonna be2:57 attached to it. And from there, you can, you know, transfer it to your iPad, your computer, you can read it on your phone. We've been I've been working on this for a couple months, and so it literally finished this week.3:08 So we don't have any physical copies or anything like that yet. We literally finished editing like on Wednesday and got it to the team, and we're able to offer it digitally today. And so, the reason being3:20 is because the message I'm gonna share, I believe a lot of men are gonna say I'm excited, what's next though? How can I continue to develop as a man of God? Which is why I've been really ferociously for Father's3:32 Day wanting to work on that book, The Anatomy of a Godly Man. If you know, 1 of my convictions, 1 of my convictions for men is every man should be a Luke 2 52 man. The Luke 2 52 says that3:44 when Jesus grew up in age, it says He grew in wisdom, stature, favor with God, and favor with man. Now every woman could pursue that too, but I also believe that if a man3:56 would commit in his life to grow in Godly wisdom, to grow in Godly stature, to grow in favor with God and man, we will see a lot of men make an impact in their homes and in4:07 their communities. And so, I just want to encourage you, we'll share it again at the end if you want to get a hold of it, but we want to be able to resource you. Before I jump into the message today, I thought it'd be4:18 good, on Mother's Day we shared a few jokes. So, it's Father's Day, so I thought I would share a few dad jokes with you, Okay? Specifically, some dad jokes. Some of them I presently use with my sons right4:30 now. But here's a couple for you. Did you hear the rumor about butter? Nevermind, I shouldn't spread it. Some of these you may have to ask your neighbor what4:42 that meant. Why did the dad bring a ladder to church? Because he heard the sermon was going to a whole new level. I told my4:54 wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised. I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I5:06 don't know why. And the last 1 is I told my kids I was made in God's image. They said then God needs to hit the gym.5:21 Look at a dad somewhere and say he's not talking about you. Well, for today's message, I want to share with you a message called fathered. What it5:33 means to be a father, and what it means to be fathered by God. I have some verses I want to read with us together, and we're gonna share those verses throughout the message. You do me a favor for just a moment, would you5:43 just stand for the honor of reading God's Word? I'm not reading verses in the traditional way that we normally do where it's 1 passage. I got some passages that I want us to see together about the Word, what the Word5:53 says about what it means to be fathered by God, but also what it means to father. Here's what James chapter 1 verse 21 says. Religion is that it's pure and undefiled before God the Father is this.6:05 To visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world. Romans chapter 8 verse 14 says for all who are led by the Spirit of God6:17 are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the spirit of adoptions as sons by whom we cry6:29 Abba Father. The Spirit Himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God. And if children, then we are heirs. And if heirs of God, then we are fellow6:41 heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with Him in order that we may also be glorified with Him. And then lastly, John 14 18, Jesus says I will not leave you as orphans,6:53 I will come to you. Speaking of giving us the Holy Spirit. You may be seated today. 1 of the things we'll see today, and it'll begin to bleed into what it means to be an earthlyOvercoming the Orphan Condition 7:05 Father, but it's important for us to understand who our Heavenly Father is, and how that relates with the world today. We recognize through the messages and the sermons and the verses we just read, that God7:17 has adopted us. And God has adopted us as a Father that reflects love. And what happens is today, the church must rise to restore fatherhood in a7:29 fatherless world. We do. We live in a fatherless world. We live in a culture that's starving for identity. And identity always flows from intimacy. How many of you guys know the7:41 more time you often spend with someone or something, the more intimate you become with it? Same way with God. The more time that we spend with God as our Father, the more intimate of a7:52 relationship that begins to be. Also, the more time that you spend in the presence of God is the more healing that it could be at the same time. Jesus said in John 14 18 that we just read, He8:04 says when He speaks of when He was going to ascend to Heaven, and people were going to be scared, but Jesus, then you won't be in our life anymore. Jesus, you won't be present anymore. Jesus says, I will not leave you as8:14 orphans, I will come to you. He's speaking of the Holy Spirit. It's God's desire that we not be fatherless. And what happens, Jesus wasn't just speaking to the fatherless and8:26 natural, He was speaking to the spiritually abandoned, the emotionally neglected, and the relationally starved. And what does Jesus say? He says I'm coming for you. The8:37 heart of a father is not to leave, but to lean in. It's a great father. And it's God's desire that he not leave us or forsake us. 1 of the things I want to share about a little bit is that8:49 statement I made a moment ago was that we live in a fatherless culture. And if you're taking notes, I want you to see that we have a culture today that is fatherless. In large, there9:01 is a fatherless culture. And if there are fathers, a lot of them, not all of them, but a lot of them have never seen it mirrored. And so, they don't know what to do. They're doing it for the first time. And so, what the9:13 word of God says in James 4 1 27 that we read, it's this, Religion that is pure and undefiled before God the Father is this, to visit orphans, widows in their affliction. The Greek word to9:25 visit that's used here is episkamatai, which means to intentionally care for. To attend to. You see, God says that it's the heart of a believer, and9:37 God's desire for believers that we care for the orphans. I'm gonna share in a few minutes more about what that is. But there's this calling to care for those in society. Because9:48 in Jesus' society, in Jesus' culture and day, a widow had no provider. An orphan had no protector. There wasn't a government aid system. And10:00 so, a widow who did not have her husband anymore had had no 1 there to provide for her. There wasn't a government that stepped in. Same thing with orphans. There wasn't any type10:12 of group. There wasn't a government group, there wasn't a non profit group that came in and cared for orphans. And so there was no protector for orphans. And the Bible talks about orphans and widows because10:24 both represent individuals that don't have a covering over their life. Today, 1 of the most unreached mission fields is not just a tribe overseas, it's the living10:36 room of a fatherless home. That's a mission field that we have today in our own backyard. According to recent studies, 1 in 410:48 children in the US will grow up without a father. 1 in 4. Fatherless homes account for 90 percent of runaways, 85 percent of behavioral11:00 disorders, and 71 percent of high school dropouts. Just this year alone, 444000 suicides, Almost half a million suicides have taken11:11 place up till June already. Almost a million people by the end of the year. And 75 to 80 percent of those will be men. A lot of them will be fathers.11:24 This is heartbreaking when you look at the data. 1 day I met with 1 of our, the head San Bernardino County Sheriff and he was talking to me about the prison system and the juvenile system and11:36 things like that. And and he said this, and, and it absolutely blew my mind. He said there are a lot of young men that grow up in the juvenile system, that the moment they turn adults11:48 and they turn 18, they will commit a crime so that they can go to prison. And I asked them why would they why would they purposely commit a crime? And he said,12:00 because over half of those juveniles that go to the juvenile detention center, he said almost over half of them, their fathers and grandfathers are in prison. And so they will commit12:12 a crime just so they can get time with dad. I mean, think about it. Think about understanding someone that's in12:24 prison for 15, 20 years, 30 years, even to life, and a young man is so desperate just to have any time with a father that they commit a crime12:36 to spend time with dad. They're not gonna be able to bunk with dad. They're not gonna be able to room with dad. But that 30 minutes, that hour for lunch, that time in the yard,12:48 that's the time with dad. Think about what kind of pain's gotta be in your heart that you're gonna go commit something so that you can just get time with dad. We live in a culture that's fatherless.13:00 We live in a culture where a lot of people are hurting. And so we don't just have a social crisis, we have a spiritual famine of fatherhood today. And the second thing we13:12 see that in a fatherless culture, we see that there is still an orphan condition. There's a condition that still perpetrates today of orphanhood. And an13:24 orphan isn't just a child. Here's the thing in Jesus' culture and society, you'll notice that Jesus, if you read the Gospels, He talks a lot about children.13:36 He talks a lot about orphans. He talks a lot about widows. James, who was the brother of Jesus, we saw that he just spoke about orphans, he just spoke about widows. And you think to yourself,13:48 that's so far from me. I mean yeah, we have widows today, but you know, a lot of times, you know, insurance will look after widows, or retirement will look after widows. When we think of14:00 orphans, we think, that's like for the movies. That's like Annie. Like her growing up in a home, and then getting adopted, and that, you know, and that's what an orphanage is. Like they have14:11 orphanages in third world countries, you know? In America, there's you know, foster care systems and there's adoption systems, but nowhere in my circle do I experience an orphan condition14:23 or an orphan mentality. You see, if Jesus were living today and He were to survey our cultural landscape, He would say you have more orphans than you realize. Because in the14:35 Jewish culture, an orphan wasn't a child that didn't have a mom and dad. An orphan in Jesus's culture was a child who didn't have a father.14:47 A child could have a mother. There's a reason why he said widows and orphans, because oftentimes widows had children. And in Jewish culture, an orphan was someone that didn't have the spiritual covering of a father14:59 in their home. It wasn't someone that didn't have parents, it was someone that didn't have a dad. And so Jesus says, you have a lot of individuals in our society who don'tBuilding Your Fatherly Toolbox 15:11 have dads, and we're not doing anything about it. And he said as men, we're not stepping up and we're not loving those who have never experienced a loving father. And so when he talks about15:23 caring for an orphan, he's not just talking about financial support, he's talking about as men of God in culture that are able to speak truth and love those who've never had an15:35 active father in their life. The orphan condition isn't just someone who grew up in foster care or an adoption center, it's someone who grew up without an active father in their life.15:48 When I was a youth pastor, over 50 percent of my youth students didn't have active dads in their home. And so the only male interaction they would ever have was on Sunday at service.16:01 And you would see young men and young women begin to transform when they started to experience an active father in their life. There's a reason why in Romans chapter 8 verse 15 to 16, the16:13 Apostle Paul gives us such great hope that we read. And he said you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you received the spirit of adoption as sons by whom we cry Abba Father.16:27 You see, this is the first time it's shared in Scripture. It's the first time in their current day, in Paul's day and in Jewish day, that they ever heard God referred to16:39 as Abba. There had always been this picture of God in Heaven and somewhat be far off, somewhat being distant from them. But when Paul steps in and he says hey,16:50 hey, here's 1 thing you gotta understand about God, Is God is not just some distant father that phones in on occasion, or is there just to rescue you when you go to prayer or call in. God is17:02 Abba. That is the most, in Jewish culture and in Greek, and in Aramaic, that is the most intimate term of endearment that you could have for a father. Timothy17:14 Keller puts it like this. He says, the only person who dares wake up a king at 3 am for a glass of water is a child. We have that kind of access to God.17:27 You see, God doesn't just tolerate orphans, He adopts them. You know, there are times with people where you know, because maybe our ministry has impacted them, and17:38 maybe sermons have impacted them, or a podcast, sometimes men and women, they'll come up to me and they'll be like, oh I'm just, I'm sorry, I'm just so nervous to meet you. And I'll hear that and you know, when I first17:49 started hearing that was very foreign to me. But then I slowly started to understand, because they were talking about how, you know, God had changed their life, and so when they would meet me, they would get nervous. And18:00 their voice would get cracky and shaky. And, and, but what happens a lot of times if I'm out greeting people and individuals do that, they'll just, they'll say I'm sorry Pastor Adam, I'm just so nervous. I didn't meet18:10 you now. I don't think anything's unique about me. Get with my wife, she'll tell you very fast that nothing's unique about me. But there are times that my sons will come out of children's church and they'll just blow18:22 past that individual and they'll be like dad, I got a popsicle in children's church, open it for me right now, please. They don't care what I'm doing. When18:34 I'm in the room, and my sons are in the room, I'm on duty. They, they, I could be in the middle of intercessory prayer for someone. And18:45 my sons, yeah yeah hey dad, you're, come on, you're on duty now. I need you to fix this for me. Alright, can you get me some water? Or can we go outside and play? They just, they know because I'm18:57 their dad, there's just access. They don't have to guess. They don't have to wonder. They don't have to. It's just, hey that's dad. Do I give them everything that they want? No. But they're never scared to19:09 ask. And they know whether I give it for them or not. They know, at least we can go to dad with it. You don't, you don't have a God, you don't have a Father that19:21 you need to go to trepidatiously, or scared, or timid, or God, if you have some time, or God, I wonder, or God, I'm sorry. If you don't know what you're doing, you got a19:33 heavenly father that does. And so if you're a father today, and you're saying I've never had an active father in my life, I don't know how to raise these kids, I don't know how to be married, I don't know how to be a19:45 grandfather. You have a Heavenly Father. Jesus says He will not leave us as orphans, He will adopt us into the family, and when you're an heir with God, it means God will guide you.19:57 Keep it real with God. You don't have to fake it to make it. You don't. You see Psalms 2seven 10, King David said this because he didn't have a20:09 great relationship with his father or mother all the time. 1 son was born out of an affair. Another son tried to kill him when he got older. And so King David says, for my father and my20:21 mother have forsaken me, but the Lord will take me in. You see, earthly relationships, they might fall short in your life. But you have a Heavenly Father that will always20:34 take you in. Cause we're called, you don't raise children with your opinions, you raise them with your example. And what we gotta recognize, Tony, Tony Evans says a20:45 godly father is the unseen spiritual submarine who lurks below the surface of every activity of his child's life.20:58 You see, what happens is when we begin to recognize that you have adoption from God, it means that you also can recognize that you're not doing this alone. That you're not doing this from a place of21:10 you don't know what to do, you don't know how to do it. You come from a place that you can go to the Lord, and you can say God, help me. Help me. Lord, I21:22 don't know what I'm doing. Cause you can be saved today by grace, and you can still live like an orphan. You can be a Christian and still have a condition of fatherlessness.21:35 And that will happen with earthly relationships, but you'll also let that happen with how you view God. But God is not there to live by the example of man. God is21:47 there according to His word to set the example. To show us what it truly means to be a father. And God can show you today. You can be called a21:59 son and still carry the scars of fatherlessness. You can call God Father and still not know what it means to be fathered. I want to spend a few minutes22:11 talking about covering. What it means to be covered not by just by God, but also fathered by God, but formed by men. Cause that's what God22:23 has called us to do. As we are led by the Father and God will teach us how to father, it's up to us to form 1 another. Book of Proverbs says that iron sharpens iron.22:35 And so where you may lack certain areas of your life where you don't know how to be a father, you don't know how to receive being fathered, then the reality is what we can do is we can help 1 another. We can22:47 help form 1 another. That's why it's so important for us that we encourage to go to growth track and forward and join a neighborhood group. Because it's you stepping outside of your comfort zone to say hey,22:59 I understand that I need to be sharper in my life, and I understand I can't do this on my own. And there are people that may be more gifted in 1 area of your life23:11 than you are. And you may be more gifted in another area of your life. First Corinthians chapter 4 verse 15 says this, you have countless fathers or you have countless23:22 instructors, but not many fathers. This was written 2000 years ago. How true is that? We've got good23:34 podcasts, we got great YouTube sermons and videos, and we got good TikTok men that talk about what it means to be a man, and we got great TikTok23:46 theologians. But who is calling out your identity? Who's correcting you in love? Who's gonna show up for you when you fall?23:58 You can't ring that person you follow on TikTok. You can't you can't message that YouTube preacher that you're watching on YouTube. Hey, I need you to24:10 get here right now to Rancho Cucamonga. I'm going through some marriage things. See, what happens is we gotta recognize if we don't live life in community and accountability, there are not24:22 enough just messages you can ingest or things that you can just follow or, or traits that you can try to adapt. If you don't have someone that says hey, I want to speak some things into your24:34 life. Because there will be moments that the moment you step into being a godly man, not just a man, because culture and society defines manhood completely different than what the Bible defines manhood24:45 as. But if you stop, if you step into Godly character, Godly fatherhood, Godly manhood, what's gonna happen is you are gonna be challenged in areas24:58 where the rest of the world isn't challenged in. Cause anyone that just has father wounds, guess what? They either A, get to duplicate them and say, well I'm doing it because that's all I've ever seen.25:10 Or they get to say I reject any father because I've never known a good father. So either you duplicate what you've seen, or you just reject the entire thing. But when you25:22 say Lord, I want to step into a godly manhood, a godly character, then He'll say Okay. Well let's turn the heat up then. Let's develop that. The only, the only,25:34 you ever been into a kitchen before like at a restaurant? It's hot in there because things are getting cooked. Things are getting developed. I've never been in a cold kitchen before in my life. I've never been in 1. It's25:46 always hot. There's always a window that's gotta be cracked. There's always a towel on someone's shoulder to wipe the sweat off. Because if you want anything cooked, if you want anything developed, it means it's gonna25:57 get hot. It means you're gonna get tried. It means character's gonna be developed. And if we're just gonna say that's it, I'm out of the kitchen, cause I get burnt every time I'm in that kitchen. And guess what?26:08 Nothing's ever gonna get made. Nothing's ever gonna get served. If you're just walking out every single time you get a little burnt, you get a little scratch, then guess what? You're never gonna be able to develop the26:20 way that God wants to develop you. I was so encouraged last week but also I was challenged thinking to myself, what would I do? Pastor Fuego is our campus pastor up in Alameda and they had baptisms this past weekend.26:32 Well, a few months ago he called me and he said, hey Pastor Adam, I'm in a little bit of a pickle. I said, what's going on, Pastor Fuego? He said, well, there's this guy that26:44 started coming to my church, and I'm not really comfortable with it. I said, why aren't you really comfortable with it? He goes, well because like 7 years ago, he robbed me. He stole from me. And he found26:56 out I'm a pastor, and I guess he got like saved online or something like that. And And so he just started attending my church, but like he's never paid me back my money. And27:09 and he's like, and he's just trying to like show up to church. And And he goes like, I kind of want to just tell him like, hey, there's a church on every corner. Maybe try 127:21 that I'm not pastoring. You know? He's like, I'm mad. I'm angry. You know about Pastor Fuego, he didn't he didn't have an active father in his life, at all.27:33 And so for him, his father instincts don't kick kick in for a young man that didn't have a father who robbed from him. His his rejection. Hey man, this guy's gotta go. I love him, so glad you're loving Jesus, but love27:44 Jesus in another area code or another zip code. Like, that, you know, and if you remember Pastor Aaron's sermon where he talked about forgiveness and forbearance, you know, as you forgive, forbearance is still something27:56 that you have to so Fuego's working on his forbearance, and so he goes, he goes, you know, he says honestly, I kind of like, I see him on Sundays but I kind of just like, dap him up and I keep moving because I'm still28:07 working through like, this like anger that I have. And then sure enough, I get a text on Monday morning and he goes Pastor Adam, the young man came up and he28:19 asked to be baptized. He was the last person to be asked to be baptized on Sunday. And you'll see right there, God, you'll see Pastor Fuego, he begins to cry because God is not working on the young man,28:31 God is working on Pastor Fuego. God isn't just healing the young man, God is healing Fuego. And you'll see this is a long, it's a minute and a half video. It's on28:42 Pastor Fuego's Instagram, but he's speaking to this young man, and he goes, I know that other men have quit on you. I know that people have left you alone. I know that you've been doing this by yourself. But Pastor Fuego28:54 said, I make a commitment, a covenant with you right here, right now. I will not leave you. I will not give up on you. I will not get even with you. He says I love you. And he begins to pray for this young29:06 man who's 26 years old, growing up in the streets, and he begins to encourage this young man and baptize this young man. This is what it looks like to be fathered by God. It means that29:18 God will challenge some areas of your life. God will challenge you. He will stretch you. He will say oh, you got a wound29:30 right here? Let's heal that by having you develop that in someone else. Oh, you got some anger you're working through? Let's have you love someone in an area where that anger seems to boil up every single29:42 time. You see, God, His process to develop it, and His process to healing is 1 that you and I will not feel that is comfortable. Good, Pastor. Preach it. Pastor Fuego was29:54 texting me and pastor, and he said God did something in me this weekend. God closed a chapter on something in me this weekend. That's what it means when you say God, you can father me. He'll say okay, get ready.Show more In this video 0:00 Fatherless Culture Exposed7:00 Overcoming the Orphan Condition15:00 Building Your Fatherly Toolbox30:00 Invitation to Healing & Salvation45:00 Healing & New BeginningsComments No comments yet. Start the conversation.
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