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Give Me Your Heart: Wisdom from Proverbs 23
September 13, 2026 · 18 min
Surrender your heart to God, practice discernment, and restrain appetite with godly self-control.
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Give Me Your Heart: Wisdom from Proverbs 23 0:10 Good morning. Welcome to Stand on the Word. Thanks for joining me this morning. As the sun is rising, we're looking at Proverbs chapter 23 today, 13 of the 30 sayings of the wise.0:22 Verse 26, my son, give me your heart, and let your eyes observe my ways. Alright. We're continuing the 30 sayings of the wise that began in, really at the end of0:33 chapter 22. There are 13 of the 30 here in chapter 23, beginning with number 6. Let's look at verse 1. When you sit down to eat with a ruler, consider carefully what is before0:45 you, and put a knife to your throat if you are a man given to appetite. Do not desire his delicacies, for they are deceptive food. Now the 1st 3 verses, along with verses 6 and 8,0:57 speak to discernment and restraint. Right? Self control, self government. We should consider the motives of those around us and be wise1:09 to the deceitful motives deceitful motives of some and restrain ourselves from obligating ourselves by overindulging. Alright? We just need to be discerning, need to be wise, need to hold1:21 back. Number 7, it finds, begins in verse 4. Do not overlook overwork to be rich because of your own understanding cease. Will you set your eyes on that which is not? For riches1:33 certainly make themselves wings. They fly away like an eagle toward heaven. Now this does not okay. Hear me. This does not discourage hard work nor does it, disparage riches. Solomon1:45 is pointing to the motivation. Alright? It is the love of money as Jesus talked about. This is talking about our motivation and our focus. If you're simply working to get more money,1:56 if that's your focus, more money, I have news for you. Proverbs makes this very clear. You'll never be satisfied because riches are elusive to those who seek them. John2:08 Rockefeller, who at the peak of his wealth had a net worth that was equal to 1 percent of the entire US economy. Alright? He's a wealthy man. He was asked how much money2:20 is enough. And his response was 1 more dollar. Saying number 9, verse 9, do not speak in the hearing of a fool, for he will despise the wisdom of your words.2:32 Now we've had this principle before. Don't waste your time and energy arguing with a fool. Jesus said something very similar in Matthew chapter 7 verse 6. He said, do not give2:44 what is holy to the dogs nor cast your pearl before the swine, lest they trample them under their feet and turn and tear you in pieces. It's not does not mean we don't do not share the truth, but we we2:56 we don't need to argue with those who have closed their minds to the truth. Share the truth. Move on. Number 10, do not remove the ancient landmark3:08 nor enter the fields of the fatherless, for their redeemer is mighty. He will plead their calls against you. Now here's a warning, but also an encouragement to many. God is the3:19 lord of the underdog. Alright? He cares about the weak and the needy. We've seen that repeatedly through the scripture. We're gonna see more of it. He is the defender of the defenseless, andDefending the Fatherless and Correcting Children 3:31 you are never ever outnumbered with God on your side. Verse 13, do not withhold correction from a child, for if you beat him with a rod, he will not die. You shall beat3:43 him with a rod and deliver his soul from hell. This is not this is not justification for child abuse. Okay? Now this sounds harsh to those who have been saturated with the propaganda of3:55 the last 4 or 5 decades. But before rejecting this biblical instruction as being antiquated something in the past, let me ask you this. How has coddling and pampering4:07 children rather than correcting them, including paddling them, for their bad behavior worked out? Now how's coddling this generation worked out? I would suggest you that it4:19 hasn't worked out. Now this is discipline and correction, not punishment. I've made that distinction before, and that's not semantics. It's the motivation.4:32 We should not discipline our children in anger and physical and and and physical correction is not always needed. Okay? And4:44 there's there's a lot of guidance about how to correct our children. Alright? And I I'm I'm not gonna say I was always perfect in it, because sometimes as parents you get angry, but we should not correct our children in4:54 anger. And it doesn't always require physical punishment. Right? And it should never again, there's other instruction on this. So it talks about a rod. You shouldn't you shouldn't use your hand.5:08 I don't wanna get into all all of that, but I do wanna encourage you that the scripture is very clear on this. There is there is a need to correct our children. Discipline them. Again,5:19 not punish. We're not we're not we're we're not punishing our children. We're we're our goal is to correct behavior and to, discipline them so that they5:31 are following what is best for them. Now we also need to know our children because some of your some of our children, they're well, they're different. I mean, I had5:43 1, that I just looked at them, and that was sufficient punishment. But a a large portion of the blame for our country's moral and cultural decline goes right back to the5:55 home and the lack of discipline, and that's what builds self government. And that's the foundation for all other forms of government. I teach about this in the God in Government course, which you can find on the Stand6:06 Firm app. And if you'd like more about our God in Government course, just email me, tony at tony perkins dot com. I'll send you a link. But self government is the foundation for family government, for6:17 church government, and for civil government. And without that self government, which begins in the home, none of it works. Alright? Too many parents want to be their child's friend rather than their parent.6:30 They're afraid that their children will not love them. And that friendship and that mature love will come in time if we parent our children. I love my children6:41 deeply. I I do. But I I never made them, loving me as my top priority. I wanted them to respect me. And now they I have a great6:53 relationship with my children. So grateful for my children. Children are commanded to honor and obey their parents. It's much easier to honor parents who focus on not making a child feel7:05 good, but a child to be good. As time goes on, our our children realize what we're doing, whether it's out of selfish motivation that we want something out of that relationship7:18 prematurely, or we're investing in them, helping them be all that they can be. Now I think, Solomon was probably anticipating some pushback on that,7:30 instruction. And so he continues with the outcome of correcting our children. Look at the result in the saying of the wise number 13 in verse 15. My son, if your heart is wise,7:42 my heart will rejoice, indeed I myself. Yes. My inmost being will rejoice when your lips speak right things. Nothing is more rewarding, and I can speak to this from experience7:54 now. Nothing is more rewarding to a parent than to have your children doing what is right and and prospering and doing well. And and it just8:06 it's flourishing. It's encouraging. Nothing is more rewarding. I I take more pleasure in the accomplishments of my children than in in those accomplishments that I've had, Because I count8:17 them as 1 of my greatest accomplishments as I see them growing and and prospering, as as David talked about them, children being arrows in the the quiver of a warrior.8:30 My focus as our our our focus as parents, I should say, grow. It it it transitions from ourselves to our children as we release our8:41 children into the culture, into the world to make a difference. Now let me continue here because I wanna bring in verses 22 and and 25, which, is saying 16. Listen to your father8:53 who begot you, and do not your mother when she is old. Buy the truth, and do not sell it. Also, wisdom and instruction and understanding. The father of the righteous will greatly rejoice, and he who begets a wise child9:05 will delight in him. Let your father and your mother mother be glad, and let her who bore you rejoice. Now this this here these these 4 verses here, this is the true meaning of9:17 honoring your parents. Okay? By giving your parents a reason to rejoice and be glad that their investment in you9:28 resulted in you walking with the lord and walking in a way that is is wise and godly. Now I understand not everyone had great parents. Okay? I get that. But9:40 nonetheless, as parents, you know, at some point, we gotta break the cycle. Okay? And as as parents and maybe maybe maybe you didn't do the best job you could have as a parent. It's not too late. It's not too9:52 late. As a grandparent, just, you know, ask the lord. But we're gonna see more here. Let let's continue with saying 17 of verse 26 because this is actually instruction for parents. Okay?The Joy of Wise Children and Honoring Parents 10:04 Verse 26, my son, give me your heart and let your eyes observe my ways. This is where this is where a lot of parents have, have kind10:16 of stumbled. We must teach our children not only through our words but by our example, and it's never too late to live by example. But sometimes it10:28 requires humility that we have to admit that we didn't do it right, and and I've done that before with my children. And and then by example, we live out the same thing we're instructing our10:40 children to do. You know, I always encourage my children to be in the word, and, of course, that's what started this stand on the word bible reading plan. Some are more diligent than others, but10:52 I encourage them not only in in words, but by doing it and setting the example. And as parents, we need to do that. Alright. Back to verse 17. Do not let your heart envy11:03 sinners, but be zealous for the fear of the lord all the day. For surely, there is a hereafter. There is an eternity, and your hope will not be cut off. That's living with that eternal perspective. Because this is this11:15 is another version of that question we've seen before. Why do the wicked prosper? Their prosperity is short lived, and we cannot have a our worldview, our focus11:27 cannot be just on this world and and and on what we see. We must have an eternal perspective, and that stabilizes us, gives us that equilibrium to endure the things that11:39 we seek, the ups and downs of life. Verse 19, hear my son and be wise and guide your heart in the way. Do not mix with wine bibbers or with gluttonous eaters of meat. For the drunkard and the11:50 glutton will come to poverty, and drowsiness will clothe a man with rags. Now this needs little explanation as we see the effects of substance abuse and addiction all around us. I mean,12:02 it's gotten out of control. But but by the way, this is very instructive to point to these passages of the scripture when you you're having conversations with your children, your grandchildren about12:14 the devastation that, is becoming more and more evident each day as drug and alcohol addiction grows. And and, unfortunately, some of our government policy,12:27 you know, this libertarian viewpoint that, you know, it doesn't matter. We just need to, you know, marijuana, legalize it. There there's a reason that we've had these laws in place12:39 to restrict the access to certain drugs. But as we have these conversations with our children, we should include the scripture in those discussions because that's how we build a biblical12:50 worldview. The Bible lays out what the results are. I mean, Proverbs, has 5 different passages through the 31 chapters. There's 5 different passages dealing with alcohol and13:03 and or intoxication. Here in chapter 23 is the most extensive, and and I wanna continue that. Let's drop down to verse 29. Who has woe? Who has sorrow? Who has contentions? Who has13:15 complaints? It's kind of asking a rhetorical question there because here comes the answer. Who has wounds? Who without calls? Who has redness of eyes? Here it is, verse 30. Those who linger long at the wine.13:27 Those who go in search of mixed wine. Now this is talking about alcohol here, but it's intoxicating substances. So it doesn't have to be alcohol. It can be drugs. It can13:39 be any number of things that, affect our body, mostly drugs and alcohol. Do not look on the wine when it is red, when it sparkles in the cup, when it swirls around smoothly.13:51 At the last, it bites like a serpent and stings like a viper. Your eyes have seen strange things, and your heart will utter perverse things. Yes. You will be like 1 who lies down in the midst of the14:02 sea or like 1 who lies on the top of a mast saying, they have struck me, but I was not hurt. They have beaten me, but I did not feel it. When shall I awake that I may seek14:14 another drink? Note the extended warning on intoxication. Again, nothing else in this chapter is given as much attention. Look at verse14:25 29. Who has woe? Who has sorrow? Who has contingents? Who has complaints? Who has wounds without cause? Who has redness of eyes? The answer, verse 30, those who linger long at the wine, those who go in14:37 search of mixed wine. Then we have this case study of, of what addiction leads to. When shall I awake that I may seek another14:49 drink? I tell you what practical wisdom we find here in Proverbs for every day living. And again, I would encourage you if, children, grandchildren,Living by Example and an Eternal Perspective 15:01 this would be a great place to encourage them to just start that that develop that habit, that routine of reading the word of God by reading Proverbs. 1 Proverbs for every day of15:13 the month, 31 Proverbs. Great way just to to, it's a I would say 1 of the best places to begin reading and developing that habit of reading the word of God, and you get such practical15:25 advice and wisdom from the book of Proverbs. I hope you've been enjoying this journey through the Proverbs. And, if you're new to our journey, I do wanna encourage you to get the reading plan. You can find it at f15:37 r c dot o r g slash bible. Also coming up very soon, our pray vote stand summit in Leesburg, Virginia, right outside of Washington DC here. And I would encourage you, if you'd15:49 like, to, to join us. We'll be doing on that Saturday morning. We will be having a live, stand on the word bible study. So if you've been a part of that journey, I invite you to come and,16:01 and be with us in Leesburg, Virginia. You can find out more. Just go to pray boat stand dot o r g. Father, we thank you for your word, and, Lord, it is instructive to us. And there's so16:13 much here, in this chapter. Lord, as we think of the relationship with our children and children to parents, and and, Lord, also the the alcohol and drugs and andThe Destructive Path of Intoxication and Addiction 16:25 those things which so easily distract us and really derail so many lives, destroying so many lives. Lord, I I pray that, lord, we would heed the16:37 wisdom of your word and that we would help our children and grandchildren, lord, to just lord, develop that desire and that hunger for your word, but also, Lord, that16:48 that yielding to your word. And I pray that we would set the example for for our children, for our grandchildren. They would see that consistency, not not17:00 perfection, Lord. We can't arrive at perfection in this life. But, lord, we can be consistent in our desire to be as David was, people after your own heart. So17:12 we pray and ask all this in Jesus' name. Amen. Alright. Thanks for joining me this morning, and until next time, keep standing on the word.17:23 Today's study comes from the Stand on the Word Bible Reading Plan, available for free at f r c dot o r g slash bible. By following along in just a few minutes a day,17:34 you can read through the entire Bible in just 2 years. Learn more and request the free reading guide at frc dot org slash bible.In this video 0:00 Give Me Your Heart: Wisdom from Proverbs 233:28 Defending the Fatherless and Correcting Children10:00 The Joy of Wise Children and Honoring Parents15:00 Living by Example and an Eternal Perspective16:23 The Destructive Path of Intoxication and Addiction
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