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0:00 Hey, men. Kenny Luck here, founder of Everyman Ministries. I'm so glad you're here from wherever you are, on your way to work, in the backyard, around a fire pit, with your men's group, in a church hall. We're just soUnderstanding the Shadow Self 0:10 glad as a part of Everyman team that you've chosen to open up God's word and grow spiritually. Now a couple coaching tips. Just make sure you have your bible handy. It's always a great reference point. Make sure you have0:21 the downloaded notes. Those help you not only follow along, but then you can teach it and give it away. Now, fun fact, you know, this live stream is only 1 time a week. But we0:33 have a community of 70000 plus men who receive fresh insight and encouragement from God's word in the Everyman daily devotional. You wanna join that community and get just a fresh0:44 encouragement on a daily basis versus just the once a week meeting, go ahead and go to the bottom of the home page. There's a little space there. You put in your email and just sign up. Lastly, before we go to the0:56 study, if you have been ministered to or blessed by the every man in life for you, let me encourage you to bless another man. Somewhere in the world, on a military base, maybe it's a group of friends, maybe it's a1:07 church, give financially.1:19 There's a little donate there. It just helps us to get what you're gonna watch out into the spaces and places where men are so they can become like Jesus.1:31 Now, let's join today's study. If you have a Bible, I want you to hold a couple spots for me. 1 in second Samuel chapter 12, and the other in Matthew1:43 23. We're in part 2 of a series we're calling Shadow Self. And if you're joining us for the first time, that might sound a little mysterious. It's really not because every man1:54 has a shadow self. Who, like the name suggests, is not your image. It's not your persona. It's not your personality that you show publicly. No. The shadow self2:06 is the private you, the hidden you, that struggles. Alright? That you kinda wanna keep private. It's the version of yourself you don't want on display. It's a part of2:18 you that you're working on. And Jesus, as we saw in part 1, directly addresses the shadow self when he talks with people. Most obviously, in the2:30 Sermon on the Mount, when he says things like, you've heard it said, don't commit adultery. But I say to you, if a man has anger in his heart toward another person, he is2:42 guilty. Right? Or he'll say, you've heard it said, don't commit adultery, but I say to you, if any man lusts after a woman in his heart, he's already2:54 committed adultery with her. Right? What does Jesus know? He knows that the symptom is not the same as the root. He knows that the problem3:06 of murder and adultery doesn't exist at the level at which you finally see it, or where it finally comes out and becomes visible. Now, here's what I3:18 want you to remember about Jesus calling out the shadow self in people. It's this, Jesus sees us all.3:31 He sees all of us. He sees the good and bad in you. He sees your insides first, then your outsides, but he's more focused on your heart, on3:42 your insides. Why? Because he wants to change us from the inside out. So if you missed part 1, go back. Watch part 1 because we laid the sort of3:54 the the the road map, the process for interchange. And then now, in part 2, we're gonna start looking at profiles of men of God dealing with4:06 their shadow self. Starting with the man after God's own heart. Can you imagine having that label in the Bible? The man after God's own heart.4:18 We're going to look at David and just for a little bit of context before we roll the film in second Samuel 12. In second Samuel 11 is that4:31 famous scene and in biblical history, it's movies have been made about this, but where where David, King David, at the top of his4:43 game is roof surfing, he sees Bathsheba, and then the dominoes start to fall. Right? He lusts after Bathsheba, he has power, he goes and4:54 tells his his his servants to go get her, he sleeps with her, She becomes pregnant. And then now he has to cover it up. And then to cover it up,5:06 he tries to bring her husband home to sleep with her so that it can seem like it's, her husband Uriah's baby. That doesn't work. He ends up having more honor5:18 than King David. While his men are at war, he won't sleep with his wife, while his men are at the front lines of battle. And finally, David gives into his full shadow self and tells5:30 Joab to go put Uriah at the front lines where he is struck and killed in battle. Right? In order to create now a context for5:42 taking care of and marrying Bathsheba. So, second Samuel 12 is sort of the the post chapter5:54 of David's shadow self is ruling, he's an adulterer, He's a murderer. His shadow self6:06 is in charge until God sends another man of God. Let's pick up the story in second Samuel 12 and rule the film.6:18 And the Lord sent Nathan to David. He came to him and he said to him, there were 2 men in a certain city. The 1 rich and the other poor. The rich6:30 man had very many flocks and herds, but the poor man had nothing but 1 little ewe lamb, which he had bought. And he brought it up, and it grew up with6:42 him, and with his children. It used to eat of his morsel and drink from his cup, and lie in his arms, and it was like a daughter to him.6:54 Now there came a traveler to the rich man, and he was unwilling to take 1 of his own flock or herd to prepare for the guest who had come to him. But he took7:05 the poor man's lamb, and prepared it for the man who had come to him. Then David's anger was greatly kindled against the man. And he said to7:17 David, as the Lord lives, the man who has done this deserves to die, and he shall restore the lamb fourfold because he did this thing, because7:29 he had no pity. Nathan said to David, you are the man. This is a game changing moment in scripture.7:41 It is a show stopper. Clearly, Nathan reels David in like a big mouth bass. Right? Chasing a lure, and the7:53 lure is the story about a shepherd. K? I mean, Nathan was was smooth on on his cast and how he how he sets the8:05 hook. Right? So Nathan sets the the hook, starts talking about, a a a shepherd with 1 ewe lamb, and then this other8:16 guy who has lots of flocks and shepherds, you know, and, you know, we got the characters going here. The man with the 1 ewe lamb is Uriah. His8:28 wife is the ewe lamb, Bathsheba. The rich man is and the powerful person is David. And David takes advantage of this man's8:40 wife. And man, he he's got David's energy boiling right now. David David's energy I mean, his blood is boiling right now.8:52 And then that's when, bam, the hook is set. It gets yanked back. David gets reeled in, sucking air on the full the floor of the boat. You are9:03 that man. Now, we could go 1 of 2 ways, with this. We could really focus on how, you know, this confrontation happens, the Lord9:15 sending Nathan. But what I I wanna focus on here for for shadow self is just this confrontation, this this mirror that9:27 gets held up to David, and and and why God allowed Nathan, sent Nathan to hold up this mirror, tell the story,9:39 hook David, and get him feeling and thinking, the thoughts that he started to think in response to the story. Alright? So there's there's there's 3 3 reasons,9:51 and they directly apply to you and I in this discussion of dealing with our shadow self. Number 1, I need insight before I invest my10:03 energy. Okay? I need insight. You know, working with men for the past 30 years, 1 of the greatest weaknesses that I see in men10:15 that we see in this moment of David's life is a complete lack, listen, of self awareness. I mean,10:28 Nathan's spinning this tail and and David's looking at it like, you know, that guy, you know, that guy. Right? You know, it's that guy. Who is this guy? You know, this guy, you know, I'm10:40 angry at this guy. This guy deserves to die. And he he's gonna he's gotta give it all back and and 4 times as much to to the poor man, you know, because he had no pity.10:52 I mean, David's commenting about it, like, in the third person. There's Nathan. There's David. And then Nathan tells the story of this guy. I mean, David has no11:04 insight into himself. Right? Until, Nathan drops the bomb. So what do we need to deal with our shadow self? These parts of it. Man,11:15 we need insight. We need to search for insight about ourselves. We gotta know where we come from. What happened to us? What's going on inside of our11:27 hearts that could create this this person who could, you know, see and do things and then completely separate11:39 ourselves and like listen to a story of someone else who's kind of done the same thing, but then not see it in ourselves. Okay? Secondly, I11:50 need to know what God knows about me. You know what's cool about this story? Is that David's relationship with God is there. But David is12:02 lacking the self awareness at the moment. And so, what does God have to do? God has to use another man of God who who sets the hook12:14 and the lure. Right? So that God can reveal David to David. K? What do we learn about God in this process?12:26 Is that God as God as you have a relationship with God, he will he will do some things that other people in your life won't. He'll reveal you to you. Why? Because he sees12:38 you from the inside out. Right? That's we that's what we read in the Bible. That man looks at the outward appearance. God looks at the heart. God sees your shadow self. God12:50 sees your intentions. God sees your whole history and maybe some of the things, the unresolved pains or traumas or or or hurts that that have shaped you,13:02 and He sees your heart. He sees this part of you. Right? That no 1 else sees. So not only do we need insight before we start investing more energy in our13:14 journey in life, our journey with God, but we also need to know what God knows about me. Now, you'll see David in other Psalms saying, surely you desire truth13:26 in my innermost being and in the hidden place. Like, David knows that this is God's process. You know, third, we need13:38 a pure source to draw from. Okay, we need a pure source to draw on, you know, you've got you've got Nathan and you've got everybody else. You13:50 know, everybody in the palace, you know, saw all this stuff that was going on. You know, his his his officers, his first circle, his, you know, and14:02 nobody's confronting this, you know. Most likely because they're they're concerned with losing the favor of the king. You ever did that before? You ever been a man pleaser versus a God14:14 pleaser? Right? And you weight the opinions of men ahead of what's right and good and true and what God wants. Okay? Not Nathan.14:26 Nathan, God's man, is listening to God's voice and he's willing to risk it all to help a brother. Now let's just pause for a14:38 second. Let the paint dry on that 1. Nathan is God's man. Listening to God's voice. God's man listening to God's14:50 voice becomes willing to risk it all to see God's purposes advanced in another man's life. And in this15:01 series, what I want you to know is that we're kind of doing the same thing. Okay? We're not directly confronting15:13 any man, but we're not comforting you. But we are doing 1 thing. We are challenging you to hold up a mirror and to be strong and15:25 courageous, and really take a look at your inner man, that shadow self, and deal with him the way15:37 God wants. Alright? And, that's what I love about this story is that God sends a man to David. You know? That's what we need in the body of Christ.15:49 That's what we need wherever God's men is. You need other men in your life who can be a pure source, like, 1 you could trust. Like, David knew16:01 he could trust Nathan. And because Nathan knew that David trusted him. Right? Because he was a man of God, Nathan could could drop the16:12 bomb. Now, it wasn't a stab to kill. You know, there's people who, you you know stuff comes out of their mouth directed toward you. It's a stab to kill.16:25 This is a cut to heal. Like God needs to cut into David's character a bit and remove16:37 the very things that are holding him back. But it starts with self awareness. It starts with revelation about himself and it starts16:49 with a pure trusted source that David can draw on. Okay? Now, here's the question. You see how David had that that17:00 blind spot? Alright? You think maybe you have might have a blind spot or 2? Alright. Just like the shadow self. Alright. How every man has 1 of those. Every man has parts17:12 of himself that he might not see. Okay? That's leading, thinking, ways of thinking, ways of believing that are so embedded17:24 in his mind. In science, they call it neurodensity. Right? That needs that needs to come out. Be exposed. God needs to reveal it to you17:36 in some way. So, what I want you to do is I want you to ask God. God, is there a part of my inner man that I'm not aware of? Right?17:50 It's holding me back in my relationship with you like David. He just wasn't seeing it. God, make me self aware. Holy Spirit, make me self aware18:02 because I don't want anything to get in the way of my connection to you and my ability to connect with other people. That's the goal of this series, to kinda18:15 let God reveal what's what might be holding you back. Now on your downloaded notes, we're gonna move to, you know, another situation.Confronting Spiritual Blind Spots 18:27 The energy is right there with, like, Nathan and David. But this is Jesus and religious guys. And and this is, man, this is like,18:39 open heart surgery. Okay? This is like thoracic saw, retractors, where Jesus is confronting religious guys. And I want you to listen18:52 to the words of Jesus because he's speaking right into their chest. Listen to Jesus deal with religious guys. He says this19:04 in Matthew 23. Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees. You hypocrites. You clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside, they19:16 are full of greed and self indulgence. Blind Pharisee, first clean the inside of the cup and dish, and then the outside also19:28 will be clean. Woe to you teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites. You're like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside, but on19:40 the inside are full of the bones of the dead and everything unclean. In the same way, on the outside you appear to people19:52 as righteous, but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness. Woah! Now,20:04 now Jesus uses the metaphor of the life of these religious men, like they're a container.20:16 Okay? And people drink from this container. So these men influence people. People drink from20:27 their lives. They present themselves to be men who are close to God, and love God, and serve God. And they20:39 have this outer image. Right? That they put on display. They have this personality. They have this persona. They have this image. But then there's the inner20:51 reality. There's the inner man. There's the hidden man, and that's the man that God sees. That's the real man. Okay? And Jesus21:03 just goes right after the shadow self. You know? He's like, okay. These activities, these things you do, they're not consistent in any way with21:15 who you really are and your your motives. Right? And so, what we're going to do is we're gonna just unpack those 3 verses, Matthew21:27 23 25 to 28, and we're just gonna look and draw some conclusions, based on what Jesus says, and then we're gonna we're gonna look at21:39 ourselves and make application. Alright. The first thing that we see, because these guys have spiritual blind spots, a spiritual blind spot results in misplaced energy. Okay. So, think21:51 about it. When Jesus says, you clean the outside of the cup. That's energy going out. Alright? So, it's energy going out into the outside22:03 man, the image, presenting something to the public. And then Jesus says, but inside, they are full of greed and self indulgence. So you got right actions, right22:14 image, wrong motives, wrong heart. You know, Thomas A Kempis, this famous Christian from a long time ago, he22:26 said, man, right, man weighs actions, like the outside, What man looks at kinda what people do. Man weighs actions. God22:38 weighs intentions. Woah. Where people assess, oh, this is what that person does. God's saying, I look at why they do22:50 what they do. Woah. Right? Why do you do what you do? Why do you go to Bible study? Why do you attend church? Why do you talk the way23:02 you talk? Why? What's the motive there? Right? There's another passage in the Gospels in Mark's gospel chapter 7 that speaks into this,23:14 and it's Jesus talking. Listen listen closely to what he says. It is what comes from inside that defiles you. For from within, out of23:26 a person's heart come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, wickedness, deceit, lustful desires, envy, slander, pride, and foolishness.23:39 All these vile things come from within, they are what defile you. So Jesus is always pointing to23:52 our insides, our shadow self. Beginning in the Sermon on the Mount and in many other places with the Pharisees, here in Mark's gospel. And what's he saying? I mean, just24:04 to simplify everything, he's like, hey, that inside stuff, that inside junk is what needs our attention. Right? The motives, the24:15 heart, the healing, the character. Right? And that's all possible if we stay connected to Jesus, but Jesus is going to to tell us where to24:27 focus. And that's what I love about the series, is it's very consistent with scripture. Because scripture says in Proverbs 4 23, might wanna make a side note, Proverbs 4 23, Watch over your24:39 heart with all diligence, for from it flows the springs of life. So we live as God's men, not from the outside in, but from the24:51 inside out. So spiritual blind spot, results in misplaced energy. You got all this activity on the outside, meanwhile, God's looking at the heart. Second, spiritual blind25:03 spot results in misplaced emphasis. Okay? Misplaced emphasis. Jesus says in the Matthew 23 passage, you are like25:15 whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside. And so, you see religious people,25:27 and people who are watching them looking at the wrong thing. Right? You know, if if I was to meet you, as a man of God and I met25:39 you, I mean, I could say the right things. I could hold my my my big 50 pound Bible here. I could roll, you know, with with the lingo.25:51 I would know what to say, to get you to think, that I'm a man, of God, you know? But emphasizing that is not the26:03 emphasis of knowing the Lord. Right? I don't want to be like these people who, you know, they they have the right26:14 actions. They're winning the battle of images among men. But listen, they're they're losing the battle for their connection to Jesus. It's a misplaced26:26 emphasis. Right? So I'm pushing you back, holding up the mirror. You know, why do we why do we come to the scripture? Is it to create a space where the26:38 Holy Spirit can change our lives and we can hear from Jesus? Or or is there another reason? Is it to feel better about ourselves? Is it to have other people accept26:50 us? Right? Because we're we're we're in bible study. Is it is it to perform, you know, for God, like God's grading us on a curve? You see,27:02 when you look at David, after this confrontation with David Dave Nathan, and you you see his his expression of his heart after,27:14 It's clear that that David got it and he wants to put the emphasis in the right place. But first, I want to share this verse from Matthew. Matthew27:26 15, 8 and 9. We're gonna put it on the screen. Once you read that with me. These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship27:38 is a farce. Wow. Isn't that interesting? Where you can see people doing all the right things. Hands raised. Hallelujah. Amen. But if their actions, don't don't27:50 match their motives. If their heart and their lips are not like together. What is Jesus saying? Activity for God does not mean you have a connection with God.28:02 Or religious activities. That doesn't mean necessarily that a person is really close to God. And this is what the passage in Matthew 23 suggests. Now I want you to look at David himself since he's our28:14 profile. Make the transition. It's sort of like, okay, now I want the emphasis to go to where it needs to go so that my28:26 outsides actually match my insides. This is the prayer from Psalm 51, 1 of the greatest prayers ever prayed. You can pray this for yourself. You can pray it now.28:38 David says, and you can say, create in me a clean heart, oh God, and renew a28:49 steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me away from your presence, and do not take your Holy Spirit29:02 from me. You see, that's the right emphasis. If if if we're not self aware and we don't we're not aware of, you know, our our blind spots like these religious guys Jesus is29:14 talking to, we can put the misplaced emphasis ourselves, and then we can get people to put a misplaced emphasis on behaviors and behavior management and29:26 religious actions versus where God puts the emphasis versus what what David after he learns this lesson puts the emphasis and that is I need a clean heart.29:38 That word create, Bara, is the same word used in Genesis 1. K? In theological language, it29:49 means to make something out of nothing. K? The the actual way theological term is ex nihilo. To to make something out of nothing. So what's David asking for? David's going,30:01 hey, I don't ever wanna do that again. And to I need you to make me completely new. Would you have the courage to say to God right now? God,30:15 I do not want my shadow self in charge. I do not want to think and do things where I'm I'm30:27 I'm not your man. I I need you to create me new. Create a clean heart in me, God. Just say it. Create into me a clean heart, oh, God. I need you to make me30:39 completely new. Put your Holy Spirit inside of me. Make me new. Right? That's what's cool about knowing Jesus is that we can ask him30:51 the creator of the universe to create a new us. Third thing that happens when you don't recognize a spiritual blind spot is a spiritual blind spot results in31:03 a missed connection with Jesus. Notice in the Matthew 23 passage when he's talking to these religious dudes, he's going, you're blind. Blind Pharisee. BlindShow more In this video 0:00 Understanding the Shadow Self18:25 Confronting Spiritual Blind Spots31:04 The Path to Inner Transformation1:00:24 Embracing the Next Spiritual Adventure
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