Skip to content Teach Them to Make Wise Choices, Part 2 Dec 18 · 25 min ...more
Teach Them to Make Wise Choices, Part 2
December 18, 2025 · 25 min
What's the process for making good decisions? Chip lays out four ways to help your children evaluate their circumstances and make choices they'll be glad they made.
Series Leaving a Legacy that Lasts Forever December 18, 2025 · 25 min · Leaving a Legacy that Lasts Forever
What's the process for making good decisions? Chip lays out four ways to help your children evaluate their circumstances and make choices they'll be glad they made. ...more Show the full description Show less What's the process for making good decisions? Chip lays out four ways to help your children evaluate their circumstances and make choices they'll be glad they made.
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Chip Ingram is an American Christian pastor, author, and teacher. He is the founder, teaching pastor and CEO of Living on the Edge, an international teaching and discipleship ministry.
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Saturating the Mind with Truth 0:01 Today on Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram.0:04 How do you get God's best for your life? You know, you see some believers and you sense, boy, they're in the right relationship, they make wise decisions about money. They're getting God's best. I want that. How does it0:15 work? Today, I will give you 4 biblical principles that will help you discover how you can get God's best for your life. Stay with us.0:26 Holiness is a word that intimidates most of us. It's an unachievable virtue, or so it seems. What if everything you've been told about holiness is wrong? What if God's call to holy living0:38 isn't about following a list of don'ts, but about discovering the pathway to extraordinary joy, fulfilling relationships, and a life that truly works. On today's edition of Living on the0:50 Edge, Chip Ingram dismantles our misconceptions about holiness and reveals it for what it really is, wholeness, health, and the key to experiencing God's absolute best. Far from being1:02 otherworldly or strange, holy living makes us winsome, loving, pure, and unmistakably Christ like, the kind of person others are drawn to. And after Chip's message, we'll explain how you1:13 can participate in the time limited match that's active a short while longer. Every dollar you give will be matched and therefore doubled through December 30 first. But right now, the message from Chip Ingram about1:25 leaving a legacy that that lasts forever.1:29 Number 1, encourage them to saturate their mind with truth. The Bible, great books, videos, all I want you to get is where do you set your1:40 mind? Where do you set your mind? First and foremost, we have to model this, and then you gotta pass that on. And it's gotta be passed on not as a1:52 club. You know? Okay, kids. Get around the table right now. It's breakfast time or supper time. Alright. Nathaniel, open Proverbs chapter 1. It's the first day of the month, isn't it? Read it. Now.2:04 Ethel, shut up. Listen to your brother. He's reading God's word. I can tell you where these kids are gonna be at about 18. It will not be in church or much to do2:16 with God. And I I talk to my kids now, my 1 son is a pastor. I said, well, Ryan, what what what was it that really clicked for you in terms of how did God lead you that way? And I'm thinking, man, it's 1 of my2:28 great messages, I'm sure. You know? And, but this is my kids. He said, well, dad, it's really pretty easy. You know? I don't know how many times, you know, when you're a little kid and you get up and go to the bathroom2:37 and you think it's the middle of the night because it's like 5 o'clock, and for you it's the middle of the night, and there's a light on, and mom's on her knees praying. Or she's sitting in the chair with a cup of coffee2:46 reading God's word. And, I just grew up watching you and mom. That's what mattered. And so you you have to create when they're little. And then when they're older,2:58 saturate their mind with truth. Encourage that. The second is encourage them to hang out regularly with wise, godly people. Proverbs 13 20, he who dwellsSurrounding Yourself with Wise Companions 3:10 with wise men will be wise, but the companion of a fool will suffer harm. There's a great line. I I got this from, the vice president of a guy that I work with, and his wife was there. We were talking about3:22 the influence of kids, and, you know, you're always worried about who to hang out with. And she just turned to all of us and said, well, I'll tell you. You show me your friends, I'll show you your future. I mean, I don't3:33 know where she I wrote that down. I've been using it since. And when I when I can remember to give her credit, I do. Like now. But I mean, it's true. Think of who you're investing in. You need3:45 if you have control, you need to be very careful about who they hang out with. You know, some guys I've had the opportunity to help and disciple, you know, I've really talked about, hey, brother. You know, I got news for3:54 you. I love you. I care for you. We're playing hoop. You're a new Christian. You're making progress. Now tell me again about what you came out of. It was new age and cocaine. Right? Okay. And you used to smoke this stuff4:04 and sell it. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. And you're telling me you're struggling. Right? Okay. Why are you struggling? Okay. Now tell me who you're hanging out with. 2 other dealers. Now help me with this. I mean, I'm in Santa4:16 Cruz, California. I mean, this is normal. Help me with this. You think you're not gonna do that hanging out with them? Well, they're my friends, and I wanna lead them to Christ. Hey. You lead people to Christ on neutral4:26 turf. You know what? You don't go over there, and they probably are gonna come to church, but let's find some neutral places where let's have them hang out, and you can influence them instead instead of them influence4:37 you. More than 1 time, when my kids I said, you can't play with those 2 kids anymore. But dad, dad no. You can't play with them. They can come to our house and hang out, but you're not going to their house. No one's4:48 home. I know what happens. You're just not gonna do it. Well, you did go go go. Yeah. Of course. You some of us need to be those of you that have smaller children or teenagers, it's okay to be the bad person.5:01 It's okay. They they can, I don't love you anymore? Let them slam the door. You know? Who are you to tell me who I can be friends with? Your parent. That's who. I don't love you. Now now5:13 here's what I hear. And I've got a number of cases. You know, it's anecdotal. But here's what I hear. Well, if we set those boundaries too tight, then they'll rebel. Especially in the area of teenagers dating5:24 unbelievers. And I hear, oh, we can't do that because we gotta be real careful. I got news for you. Their heart gets connected to an unbeliever that's not walking with God. They're gonna go down the tubes. So draw the5:36 line lovingly and catch it early. And I know there's a handful of success stories where that gal or that girl finally came to Christ and all the rest. Let me tell you. I got 100 other stories for every success5:48 story you can give me. The number 1 thing that causes young people to fall and fall away from their faith, And when they go to college, the reason they change their morals is not they really change their theology,6:00 but they have to change their theology to adapt their lifestyle. And when you and and when your emotions kick in and you fall in love and you get to have sex I mean, let's see. Do I really believe in God and the Bible6:10 and some of this old fashioned stuff, or this? That's a no brainer. And we can't figure out why. I mean, the statistics are alarming of the percentage of all6:22 of our, quote, young Christian youth who go away to school, about 10 to 12 percent keep their faith, 5 years later. And I've had some deep, deep conflict,6:35 with my children in that journey. And I was a really, really bad guy. And it it wasn't always pretty. And I didn't always do it right. But I will tell you, that is, it's a non6:46 negotiable. You're the parent. With that said, you're having lots of fun investing in their life and and doing lots of great things that other parents don't do with them.6:58 Because, see, you can you can you know, the bridge of truth is relationship. And the more relationship you have, the more love, the more deposits, the more truth that they can hold.7:10 Because at the end of the day, they don't wanna disappoint you. They really don't. But but it's in a tug of war at times. Third, model for them how to ask God for discernmentModeling Discernment and Seeking God's Wisdom 7:23 and wisdom. It's really important for those you're trying to help that you don't become like the answer man or the answer woman. And well, what should I do about this? And you you know more than me. Well, can you tell7:33 me? And you say, well, do this or do that model for him. You know what? Here's a passage in James chapter 1 verse 5. Okay? If any man lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all7:45 men generously and without reproach. But let him when he asks, let him ask in faith. For the 1 who doubts is like a double minded man7:57 who's tossed here and there by the waves. Don't let that person expect to receive anything from the Lord. And then you explain to him. Wisdom is doing life God's way according to his design. He'll8:09 always show you what to do. I mean, the Bible doesn't tell you what state to live in. The Bible doesn't tell you what vocation. The Bible doesn't say you need to go to a Christian school or non Christian school. You need8:18 wisdom from God. And so what you wanna model for them is, I don't have the answer to that, but God makes a promise. And if we had time to develop that whole text, the thesis of that text of not ever doubting is not that8:29 you ever have doubts about God. Everyone has doubts. It's this the word we get our word schizophrenic. It's it's a double minded person. When you pray, god, will you show me your will so I can consider it as 1 of the8:40 options? God says no. Did you catch that? Let me just go over a little slower. Some of you went when you pray and and it's you don't do it like this intentionally, but it's what we do. God, I8:52 really wanna know what your will is about this relationship. And then when I know your will, I'll decide whether I'll take it or not. Guess what? God says, you know what? I don't answer this kind of prayers. But9:04 what he says is, god, I don't know about what to do about this relationship. I don't know what to do about this money situation. I don't know what to do about this marriage crisis. I don't know what to do about this9:15 wayward son or wayward daughter. God, I don't know about my calling, whether I should get out of this work and go to that work. Here's the promise of James 1 5. If I will come and say, god, I want you to know that I've9:26 signed my name on the bottom of the check, and I've turned it like this and put it under the throne room of heaven. I will do, no matter what it is, whatever you tell me, you fill in the top, and I'll do it. He says, 1009:38 percent of the time, I'll fill in the top. You need to and and now, how is He gonna show you? It might be through a person, through the scripture, as you pray, wise counsel. But He promises He will show you what to9:49 do. 90 percent of the will of God is being really willing to do whatever God says. Most of us, myself completely included, I kinda wanna get God lined10:01 up to get Him to do what I want because I think I know what's best. It's that surrender to be willing to do it, and you have to model that. This is where when they, you know10:13 don't say stuff like, my kids, when they were hitting the mid teens, it'd be something like, hey. You know, I I wanna do this or that or go to this movie or do that. And I would think, you know, that's that's not good.10:23 But am I gonna keep making every decision, and, we're gonna be in trouble? And so I would often say, well, would you do me a favor? Yeah. I said, pray about it for 24 hours. And just really10:35 think it through. Do you believe God wants you to go to that? Well, dad, you know, I I know hey, don't argue with me if if you know, just talk to God about it. I'm just asking you. And and again, you take that10:45 responsibility instead of the power trip. I said no. What you wanna do is start helping them. You know, I wanna buy this. I wanna go here. I wanna do that. And if you're not sure, but down deep in your heart, you think,10:56 you know, it's probably not a very good thing, but it won't kill them whatever they do. I always wanted to give them a lot more rope and say, why don't you pray about it?11:06 We'll hear more from Chip Ingram's message in just a moment. First, we're inviting you to multiply your year end donation through an exciting match that's active right now. Because of the match, your donation will be11:17 matched dollar for dollar in the month of December.11:20 And when you support this match, you're not funding yesterday's methods. You're investing in a discipleship strategy that actually reaches the smartphone generation right where they11:32 are.11:32 Will you give to the next generation? Double the impact of your gift at living on the edge dot org. From his series called leaving a legacy that lasts forever. Again, our bible11:44 teacher, Chip Ingram.11:46 And by the way, this this parental thing we have of wanting to protect our kids from pain is not real smart. What you wanna do is not protect them from small pain, so it hurts really badly.11:58 You know, like, gosh, I just spent 25 dollars on this wacky thing, and it looks seared dumb. And now I wore it to school, and it wasn't even cool, and I blew 25 bucks. Good. Or, you know, I decided to go on this thing,12:09 and man, everyone did this terrible stuff, and I wish I would've never there. And Good. See, if you always tell them what to do and you always keep them inside your bounds, then what happens is they can't wait to get12:19 away to go try some stuff. So you wanna develop them hearing God's voice. You wanna model for them how to get wisdom, how to discern. Another12:31 practical thing, with your kids is, you know you know that little clicker when you're watching something? As much as I'll talk a little bit later about limiting media, my kids, it was like, every I believe every moment12:43 is a teachable moment. And, not you don't go overboard. But I mean, okay, you're watching the Super Bowl. Right? And so, these commercials come on. And I mean, they spent what? How many zillion dollars to create this12:54 commercial? They're paying 1500000.0 dollars for 30 seconds. And here's a girl that she's got it cut down to here and pushed up to there and pulled down to here, and another guy that's been on steroids, and he's got his13:04 Coors Light and this, that, and this, that, and the music comes on bam bam bam bam bam. And they stop. Okay. Before we watch the rest of the game, what was the message of that? K. Where where are they coming at us and13:14 why? What are they selling to us? What do you think? Okay. Yeah. Why do you think she's dressed that way? K. Why does he have that? What's the mess and and you what are you doing? You're helping him discern good from13:24 evil. And so you and then you watch this real, silky movie, and it makes you cry, and it's really good, and it's really warm, and there's no sex in it, and there's no violence in it. The only problem is in this13:36 movie, the person that you identify with is married to this not very nice person. And so this person married to the not very nice person falls in love with someone else, and they have an affair. And they you know,13:45 there's music, and they're going out and dah dah dah dah dah. And we're all crying and thinking, oh, I'm glad she finally found love in her life, and it was a popular movie, and everyone loves it. And you stop the thing.13:55 And you say, wait a second. Wait a second. I got sucked in just like you, but what did she do? I mean, we all love her, and she was the pretty 1, and, you know, the music was really playing, and all the violins, and,14:07 you know, her life was so hard before. Right? You know? Okay. Let's rewind. It's called adultery. So how does that play out14:19 in real life? Let's go through some families in the church where someone committed adultery. Let's remember what that looked like. Let's remember what it did to the do you understand what I'm saying? That's what you do.14:32 So it's not a classroom. It's every moment of now, by the way, don't stop at every commercial. Some of your kids are going, hey. You know, get out of here. But you you get it. Finally, teach them to monitor their14:42 exposure to the media. Teach them to monitor their exposure to the media. Romans 12 2, we touched on it earlier. Do not be conformed to this world, this present world system, notMonitoring Media Exposure for Holy Living 14:54 the physical world. It's the cosmos. It's the world system, and first John tells us what it's made of, the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life. The way to help your kids is this is like15:04 Fortune, Cosmo, and People magazine. Okay? That's the world. If you can have her body like that, Cosmo or 17 or what else, then or, you know, Muscle magazine, Men's Fitness, you15:16 get tight abs, baby, in 6 seconds a day, you know? And with the right drugs. Or people, if you can just be famous. Right? The whole goal is to be an American idol. I want15:28 to be famous. I want people to know me. I will say ridiculous things on TV. I will go on reality shows and make a complete fool of myself doing things with a camera that I would never do privately, even in my own home,15:39 but I have to because I'm on TV. And isn't that like the epitome of all of life? I'm famous now. No, you're an idiot now. But I your kids,15:51 your grandkids, the people you're discipling are getting boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. They're bombarded. And so what and when they go to buy something, what is it? You know, the clothes are that way. The media's that16:02 way. The magazines are that way. You will never be whole and healthy instead of being deceived and seduced unless you say, stop allowing yourself to be16:14 molded by this world system. So you gotta you gotta you gotta put a real barrier in in media and how much you watch and what you watch. My kids heard it a zillion times and the people I've had an opportunity to help16:25 disciple. What you allow to go into your mind is the most important decision you make every day. Way more than what goes into your mouth. Like, my wife is really healthy. You know, this is16:37 organic and, you know, this is doesn't have any pesticides and, you know, I mean, we're really into eating good, healthy things. But, boy, you gotta you gotta put healthy stuff in your16:49 brain. You are the product of your thought life. You understand that. As a man thinks, as a woman thinks in his heart, so you become. You watch enough TV. You rent enough videos. You17:00 glance through enough magazines. It will create desires that you can never fulfill, and you'll never be satisfied, and you'll get sucked in. And the lure, right in, and bam.17:13 And so and and by the way, when you live this kind of life, this is where people will start thinking you're weird. Because we're living in a day where according to Barna, I don't17:24 know how accurate, but according to Barna, about 1 out of every 10 or 1 out of every 12 people who say, I'm a Christian. I'm born again. I've prayed to receive Jesus Christ as my savior. About 1 out of every 10 or 12 are17:36 living the life. The others have either a mental or now, I'm not saying they're not believers. I don't know. I'm just saying that they may have the living spirit of the living God living in them,17:48 but their external behavior, their values, their honesty, their commitment to marriage, their lifestyle, their speech, their priorities, and their values are exactly the same as their non17:59 Christian friends. Because you are what you eat. And if you don't believe me, this is a mature group, so I will go way out on the limb. For you younger ones who want a mild challenge, go18:11 on a 3 day media fast. K? No rent, no TV, don't get on surf the Internet, media fast. Get in the get in the car, no talk radio. You know, you can you can positive music, teaching.18:23 Okay. 3 days, no TV, no media. You you'll get antsy. You'll some of you will find you have an addiction. Because when you walk in, you turn it on. Some of you are like me, that when I do watch TV18:36 and and as soon as the commercial comes, I'm bored. So I can watch 4 shows at 1 time to relax, of course. And then I'm exhausted when I'm done. I I mean, I have to be this game, this game, this game. A high stage doing18:47 this and this and part of this movie and this. You know, like You go on a 3 day media fast. And I will tell you, you you will be 1, you'll have all18:59 this time you didn't think you had. Go on a 10 day media fast. For some of you, you'll try and you'll It'll be scary because you can't do it. Go on a 10 day media fast, then19:11 sit down and watch just general prime time TV. You will be shocked. That's how desensitized we've become. You'll be shocked at what comes out of19:23 people's mouth. You'll be shocked at the sexual innuendo. You'll be shocked at and you'll see stuff that you've grown accustomed to in terms of, you know, how people are dressed and different things that will19:35 stir your flesh that you don't doesn't even register now. And it's the classic, what's the illustration that you put the frog in the water and if you heat it up real slowly, won't jump out?19:47 We got a whole generation that ain't jumping out. And and here's the sadness, then we reap the consequences. Even though it's not a willful, volitional, I hate God sin,19:59 you just reap the consequences of a unwhole and unholy life. Because holiness is the demand of God to keep his universe healthy.20:11 So there's consequences when I put junk in my mouth. Junk in my head. It creates a set of desires. And so, limiting the20:23 video games, the violence, the sexuality, I mean, you are just gonna be a spiritual salmon swimming upstream with your fellow friends and other people thinking you are wired. Now, do I20:35 is this never watch TV? Of course not. This this is really asking yourself, is this good, honorable, right, praiseworthy? Is this in a20:47 Philippians 4 8 criteria? Does this draw me closer to God or pull me farther away? And by the way, for me, sometimes it's just good stuff. I I just have a limit. After about 220:59 hours of TV, even a great game I love sports. I just I just find I get spiritually desensitized. So I I just, you know, and I'm different than you. I don't know. Maybe some of you can take a lot more than21:11 me. But you if you take seriously what goes into your mind and then substitute it, you will see dramatic life change. Dramatic life21:23 change. What's the message? Living holy lives is how we get God's best.21:34 Holy living allows you to experience God's best for your life. Let's move holiness out of this idea of the otherworldly, dark robes, something weird, and21:46 let's move it into becoming whole, healthy, pure, winsome, loving, and receiving that life that God has in every relationship in every area of your life.22:00 This is Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. Chip is presenting a practical teaching series called Leaving a Legacy that Lasts Forever. Have you ever walked into a full restaurant and looked around only to22:12 find every diner staring into their cell phone? Maybe noticed that kids, even while gathered in a group, are preoccupied with their headphones on. It's the way our world operates these days. And at22:24 Living on the Edge, we're adopting every technology available so that we can speak into the lives of this next generation.22:31 Chip? Here's the reality. The next generation isn't going to discover faith by accidentally walking into a church building. They're going to encounter it on a podcast during a morning run or22:43 on YouTube video at midnight when they can't sleep or a bible study app while they're waiting for the barista to make their coffee. Living on the Edge meets young people in the digital spaces where they actually live.22:55 We're creating content that's searchable, shareable, and here's the key, accessible 24 7. God has sustained living on the edge for 3 decades because people like you said yes.23:07 Now we're asking again, but with a twist. Thanks to this match, your gift goes twice as far. Double impact, double reach, and here's the most important part, double23:19 transformation. Our most fruitful years are ahead. And when you support this match, you're not funding yesterday's methods. You're investing in a discipleship strategy that actually23:31 reaches the smartphone generation right where they are.23:36 Thank you, Chip. Several friends of Living on the Edge have banded together with this incredible batch opportunity in order to inspire people like you to give as well. And when you do, your contribution23:48 will be matched and therefore doubled in size, meaning it will have twice the impact because of the match. The deadline for receiving your support is midnight, December 30 first. To give right23:59 now, go to living on the edge dot org or call us at triple 8 3 3 3 6 0 0 3. To send a check-in the mail, write to Living on the Edge, PO Box24:10 3007, Atlanta, Georgia 3 0 0 2 4. 1 more time, that's PO Box 3 0 0 7, Atlanta, Georgia 3 0 0 224:22 4. You can also call triple 8 3 3 3 6 0 0 3 or just visit living on the edge dot org. How do we teach our kids and grandkids about the24:34 glories of grace? Well, I'm Dave Drewey. Chip Ingram describes grace filled living Friday on Living on the Edge.In this video 0:00 Saturating the Mind with Truth3:02 Surrounding Yourself with Wise Companions7:18 Modeling Discernment and Seeking God's Wisdom14:44 Monitoring Media Exposure for Holy Living
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