Skip to content Dangerous Dads: Session 3 May 11 · 10 min ...more
Dangerous Dads: Session 3
May 11, 2026 · 10 min
Learn how kids absorb values more through your actions than words. Demonstrate love, grace, and humility as Jesus did.
Series Dangerous Dads (With Justin Batt) May 11, 2026 · 10 min · Dangerous Dads (With Justin Batt)
Learn how kids absorb values more through your actions than words. Demonstrate love, grace, and humility as Jesus did. ...more Show the full description Show less Learn how kids absorb values more through your actions than words. Demonstrate love, grace, and humility as Jesus did.
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Far More Caught Than Taught 0:00 Hey, guys. This is power principle number 3 in the dangerous dad series. Welcome back. So glad you're here. This is a great 1 on modeling for your kids. It's called far more0:12 is caught than taught. Well, how many times do you have to tell your kids something before they actually do it? 7, 8, 9, 10 times? I know in our family, I get tired of repeating myself. Yet,0:24 your kids can watch you do something only once, and then you see them mirror it moments later. You're You're like, wait, I just told you something 20 times, you didn't listen to that, but now I do something and you0:34 observe it and now they're repeating it. Listen closely to this. As a father, 1 of my biggest mistakes has been assuming my kids had the values I expected before0:46 I had helped them learn the values. Talking about things like discipline, grit, work ethic, personal responsibility, accountability, grace, humility, and even personal hygiene. When your kids are young,0:58 they will learn these values far more by watching how you demonstrate them than they will through your teaching. As kids get older, there's more opportunity to teach them these values, But I found1:10 through thousands of hours of applying these principles with my own kids that the demonstration and application of values always trumps trying to teach them. Have you ever considered the fact that the negative1:22 behaviors we don't want to see in our kids are the very behaviors we often model the most? We don't want our kids to lose their temper. Yet if they see us getting upset over little things and losing our temper, chances1:34 are they're going to react the same way. I find it ironic that we'll get upset at our children for getting angry over something small, and yet we might be doing the very thing that we're trying to discourage them from1:45 doing themselves. And in my experience, children tend to pick up on negative behaviors more easily than positive behaviors. I'm guilty of this all the time. It's1:56 also been said that 1 of the most challenging things about parenting is parenting the you out of your child. I don't know about you, but I've got too many me's in our family. They're both challengers. They're just2:08 like me, and nothing invalidates me more than as a father when I see them acting out the behaviors that used to get me in trouble as a child and sometimes still do as an adult.2:20 It's critical you possess the self awareness to realize how much the way you model values for your children impacts their adoption of those values in their own life. For example, I have a friend who2:32 would catch his father early in the mornings on his knees in prayer over his family. Do you think that had an impact on his spiritual development? Of course it did. I've made it a habit to allow my kids2:44 catch me kissing my wife in the kitchen. Do you think that will have an impact on the way they show affection towards their wife 1 day? Perhaps the security they have as a child in our family? You bet it will and you bet2:55 it does. 1 of the most powerful ways you can impact your children is to model the practice of asking for forgiveness. When I made a stupid mistake and it was something to laugh about, I sang3:07 a rendition of Justin Bieber's song, Sorry to My Wife. We all got a good laugh out of it, and that was certainly a comical moment in our family. But there's other times when I've messed up big time, and I needed the3:19 forgiveness of the entire family. I've done things like I've lined my family up on the couch, and I went 1 by 1 washing their feet on my knees, asking each of them for forgiveness. It's a very sacred3:31 moment, and it's a moment all of us will never forget. And it afforded me the opportunity to model just like Jesus for my own children as a father. How do you determine which values to emphasize in the first place?Crafting Family Values Through Challenges 3:43 You may be asking yourself that question. Well, the key to establishing values is to identify and create your own family values. If you don't know what your core values are, then how can you expect your kids to align3:53 with them? When your kids are young, you should develop the list and solicit their input as they become older. Be creative. Put your family values on the wall in a place where everyone can see them and review them4:05 together often as a family. Now as a family, we determine 1 of our values is to be comfortable being uncomfortable. We chose this value because life is hard. We will all4:16 experience suffering. As promised, I want my kids to go through hard things daily so they develop the muscle memory of overcoming challenges in life and who to depend on for strength4:28 in the midst of those trials. Now we live on a farm, and we've got a huge hill that our driveway runs down from the home to the street down below. It's about a quarter mile down and back, and about a 4004:40 feet elevation gain with the steepest part of the hill at the end. Every day before school, my kids and I walk the hill in what we call our driveway devotional. We talk about scripture and life principles, and the4:52 kids accomplish something difficult before they start their day. On Wednesdays, we do what we call heavy day, hump day, and the kids carry sandbags weighing 10 to 40 pounds, and I carry 100 pounds on my back. Now5:04 this may seem crazy, but this is to demonstrate that life is hard, and there are times when life gets really heavy. At times I will take the sandbags from the kids and carry them for a bit. We talk about how God's5:16 yoke is not heavy and his burden is light if we allow him to take the weight. And for a moment I get to play the role of the father by taking the weight and equalizing the yoke. We5:28 also call these days lion's mane and bear claw moments to embody the story of when David went to kill Goliath and King Saul stated he was just a boy and doubted his ability to kill the giant.5:40 David's response was he he had a lion's mane and a bear claw back in his tent, meant his character and skill had been forged by going through hard things. If God had helped him overcome those obstacles5:51 then, he would help slay the giant in this moment. It's been incredible to witness my kids begin applying the values we talk about during our driveway devotionals, and I'm experiencing firsthand the way they overcome6:03 adversity in life because they've prepared for it. I've helped prepare them for it as their father. Each day, they've placed a lion's mane or a bear claw in their tent, and they have that moment to draw back on6:15 when life gets tough. These hill moments with my kids will be treasured memories for years to come. And I encourage you to find your own hill moments with your kids. Because see, your kids are gonnaModel Daily Habits and Lead Like Nehemiah 6:27 go through hard things in life. They're gonna have obstacles. And I've seen with my kids the ability for them to look back and say, I conquered this climbing the hill. I know I can conquer that. It's that lion's6:39 mane and bear claw moment in their life, and I want that for you and your kids as well. You see, as dads, we must choose the behaviors we want our kids to model, And let them see us as6:51 a father, modeling the cornerstone daily habits of prayer, meditation, reading scripture, having healthy diet and exercise, loving our spouses, and even how we use digital7:02 devices, our finances, and core character traits in a positive way. All of these areas, dads, are so important for what your kids are absorbing and consuming7:14 from you. You are the leader of the family whether you want to acknowledge it or not. Your kids are watching your every move and the way you model this for your kids is the most impressionable way that you can help them7:25 to understand these core values and behaviors. If as fathers you do this right, then you have the potential to change the trajectory of your children's lives. And7:36 once caught, they will not depart from it. Nehemiah understood the principle as far more is caught than taught. He led by example and was a man of action.7:48 He gave up a prestigious position in the King's Palace to honor his assignment by going to a politically unpopular place to rebuild a city. He took his place with the others rebuilding the wall and he got his hands8:00 dirty just like the rest of the Jews. Nehemiah didn't preach them about the importance of building the wall or how to build the wall. He just got to work. And dads, that's what we need to do in our own families. We8:12 need to get to work on ourselves because we need to be who our kids are looking for as a father. When they look to us, what do they see? Do they see an example of not a perfect dad, but a present8:24 dad who is modeling what the heavenly father displays as a father. Well, time for your next dangerous dad action step. This is how you can put this in place in your life. Sit8:36 down with your family and write out your own family values. Create ways you can take action on the values and implement them in your daily life and create your own hill walks. This is a powerful exercise as a8:48 family, and it's something I would encourage you to do every single year with your family. Talk about your values often. Put them up on a place where you can see them in your home, and this will help change the8:58 trajectory of your family forever. If you want a dad compass, you need to know which way you're gonna go, which way is your true north for a family, what values you want to instill in your kids today so9:10 that when they leave the home, they can go and navigate this difficult and dangerous world? And by helping model that for them through far more is caught than taught and creating your own value system, you can help kids9:22 grow and move forward and navigate this dangerous world with ease. So go to daddy saturday dot com if you'd like more tips, tools, strategies, even tactics, and a template on9:34 how to create your own value system for your family. And those tools are all available there for you to download for free. Stay tuned and get excited for power principle number 4. It's gonna be 1 that you don't9:46 wanna miss.In this video 0:00 Far More Caught Than Taught3:37 Crafting Family Values Through Challenges6:17 Model Daily Habits and Lead Like Nehemiah
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