Skip to content Pray for Love - Part B Dec 11 · 26 min ...more
Pray for Love - Part B
December 11, 2025 · 26 min
How can your love keep growing without compromising truth? Pastor Skip reveals how knowledge and discernment give your love strength and sincerity.
Series Connect with Skip Heitzig Podcast December 11, 2025 · 26 min · Connect with Skip Heitzig Podcast
How can your love keep growing without compromising truth? Pastor Skip reveals how knowledge and discernment give your love strength and sincerity. ...more Show the full description Show less How can your love keep growing without compromising truth? Pastor Skip reveals how knowledge and discernment give your love strength and sincerity.
Series Connect with Skip Heitzig Podcast Support this leader Liking this video? Support this ministry.
Support this leader
Liking this video? Support this ministry.
Give
Support this leader Liking this video? Support this ministry.
565K followers
Skip Heitzig ministers to over 15,000 people as senior pastor of Calvary Church in Albuquerque. He reaches out to thousands across the nation and throughout the
565K followers
0:00 Welcome to Connect with Skip Heitzig. We're so glad you've tuned in today. At Connect with Skip, our passion is to help you grow in your relationship with Jesus through solid verse by verse bible teaching0:12 that's both clear and practical. Every message you hear is designed to strengthen your faith and help you live out God's truth wherever he's placed you. But did you know that you can stay connected beyond the0:24 broadcast? When you sign up for pastor Skip's free weekly devotional, you'll receive biblical encouragement, exclusive content, and free resources to help you go deeper in God's word, all0:36 delivered straight to your inbox. It's quick, easy, and completely free, and it's a great way to stay rooted in truth every week. Sign up today at connectwithskip dot com. That's0:47 connectwithskip dot com. Now here's today's message from pastor Skip Heitzig.0:53 If I have such a capacity that the Bible tells me that I have to love people, that nobody around me should ever feel love starved. They should never feel love starved. They1:05 should feel love saturated, love soaked, but not love starved. Because if the love of God is poured out by his Holy Spirit into me, then it can then be poured out through me. I1:17 have to receive it so that I can give it. Our love then should be plentiful. That's the first attribute of a mature love. Second, our love should be perceptive. Now watch what he1:29 does. Paul could have just said, in this I pray that your love may abound still more and more, period. But he doesn't do that. He says, that your love may abound still more and1:41 more in knowledge and all discernment. Now, is important, because now Paul is qualifying what overflowing love is1:53 to look like by adding these parameters of knowledge and discernment. You see, Paul is not naive. He's not throwing out love like some cliche is2:04 tolerate anything except everything kind of a love. He says, no. The overflowing love that I am speaking about to 1 another needs banks, just like a river has banks. And2:16 1 bank is called knowledge, and the other bank is called discernment. And your love needs to flow within those banks to be safe. You see, overflowing love sounds really great, but it is like a2:28 river. And if that water has free flow without any direction or discretion, it can kill people. A few years ago, I was in Honduras. They had just had a2:39 flood. And I was in a helicopter going over these villages. The homes were washed out. Schools, hospitals were gone. People were huddled in masses and in the jungles trying to find a place for shelter.2:52 And it was all because of a river that overflowed its banks. Water's a blessing. But that much water that just flows wherever it wants to can3:04 destroy people's lives. And so too with love. If our love is just pure emotion without discretion or direction, it can bring devastation.3:15 It needs those banks in which to flow. So let's look at them. Let's look at them 1 by 1. The first bank is called knowledge, that your love may still abound more and3:27 more in knowledge. What does that mean? The word epignosis, the Greek word for knowledge here, means an expert knowledge, a mature knowledge3:39 brought on by experience. If you know anything about Paul's writing, you know that Paul will often take love and knowledge and combine them. Sometimes he'll oppose3:51 them. He'll show the difference between them. For example, in 1 Corinthians chapter 8, he says, knowledge puffs up, but love builds up.4:03 He's contrasting love and knowledge. Or 1 Corinthians chapter 13, Though I speak with a tongue of men or of angels, but I have not love, I've become like a clanging cymbal, sounding4:14 brass. And though I can understand all mysteries and have all knowledge, but I have not love, I have become nothing. So he4:26 says, knowledge needs love. But he also says love needs knowledge for that love to be responsible love. Remember when Paul spoke about4:38 a zealous group of religious brethren of his? He said they have a zeal for God, but it's not according to knowledge. And he faulted them for that. It's pure4:50 emotion, but no knowledge. Now, if you diminish your need for knowledge and you place feeling above knowledge like so many5:02 people do just do what's in your heart, man, whatever you feel like doing. That is the most dangerous, irresponsible thing you could ever do. And you would be a dangerous person to live that5:13 way. Why do I say that? Well, you can feel out of love with your spouse and feel in love with somebody who's not your spouse. A parent5:25 can feel they ought to give something, whatever the child wants to their child. Just, I'm going to give it because I feel that that's the loving thing to do. Well, could be the worst thing to do, to give them whatever5:37 they want. You may feel that love is letting another Christian do whatever he or she wants to do. That's where you need knowledge, the knowledge of Matthew5:49 chapter 18, where Jesus said sometimes the most loving thing you can do is to confront another brother or sister, and that's love. So mature love is not6:00 sentimentality, nor is it emotion. It has banks. The first bank is knowledge. 2 Peter chapter 1, he says, make every effort to add to your faith6:12 goodness, and to goodness, knowledge. So follow me. Our love should be growing, but our love should also be knowing. Knowledge is 1 of6:24 the banks that allows the free flow of love. There's another bank I want you to notice also in verse 9, and that is discernment, that your love may abound still more and6:36 more in knowledge and all discernment. Discernment means insight, mature insight, or sensitive moral perception.6:48 Allow me to explain. We might have an affection for somebody else, but that doesn't mean we have the right to express that affection any way we see fit. We need to7:00 bring discernment into it. See, there are moral and ethical considerations that are to govern the overflowing expression of our love to people.7:12 To discern something is to distinguish, to make a difference. And so every parent knows this, that love is expressed in different7:23 ways at different times to the same child. 1 day, a parent will give a gift to a child. Another day, a parent will spank a child. Both are7:35 legitimate expressions of love. Another example is that of Jesus Christ. Sometimes he'd heal a person. Another day, he would overturn the tables7:47 in the temple and with a whip drive out the money changers. Both are expressions of love, but in 2 different contexts. 1 day Jesus would say to the crowd, you are blessed. Blessed are you. Another day7:59 he'd look at another crowd filled with Pharisees and he'd say, you whitewashed sepulchers. Both are expressions of love from the 1 who is the author of love himself. Now, most of us know8:12 that the most frequently used Greek word for love in the New Testament is what? Tell me. Shout it out. Agape. Agape is the Greek word for love that8:23 expresses God's love for us. Generally, love for 1 another is to be at that supreme superior. That's what we aspire to, agape love. Well, make sure that your agape8:35 isn't sloppy. Don't love with sloppy agape. And sloppy agape is saying you love somebody, but it's really a selfish8:47 love. I'm going to do something or say something because I don't want to be disliked by that person. That's sloppy agape. 1 Corinthians chapter 13 verse 6 sums it up. Love8:59 does not rejoice in iniquity, but it rejoices in the truth. So our love should be abounding, plentiful love, but it should9:11 also be perceptive, having run within the banks of knowledge and discernment. Now look at verse 10. That you may approve the things9:23 that are excellent, that you may be sincere and without offense till the day of Christ. You see where it begins, the sentence with the word that?9:34 Everything that follows is a purpose clause, it is called, a purpose clause. In other words, it means so that or in order that. Or Paul9:46 is saying, here's the reason you need these 2 riverbanks of knowledge and discernment. Here's why. Here's the purpose for it. It's so that you can9:58 approve the things that are excellent. Now, that little word, approve, was a word used in ancient times to test metals,10:09 to approve metals, to take a coin and determine how much real metal versus alloy is in it. You would examine it. You would test it. And you would test it for purity.10:22 So he uses that word approve, and he means this. We must carefully examine every expression of our love in the light of10:34 God's word. Because then it becomes a different issue. No longer is it an issue of how do I feel, but it becomes an issue of what does the Bible say about how I10:45 feel. Does the Bible say this is a legitimate expression, an illegitimate expression? Does the Bible prohibit this? Does it encourage this? So there was a mom in10:57 Walmart with her screaming little girl in her cart. And the girl was throwing stuff and complaining and yelling. And just the volume was going up and up. And that mom11:09 was feeling like expressing her love with a slap to the backside right there in public. But instead, she said out loud, calm down, Ellen. It'll be all11:21 right, Ellen. You'll be home soon, Ellen. And as she got up to the clerk, the clerk said, ma'am, I've just got to congratulate you on how patient you are with little Ellen. And the mom turned to her and said,11:33 I'm Ellen. See, there's a lady debating, approving, what's the proper expression of my love? Talking to herself through.11:44 This is Connect with Skip Heitzig. As we reach the end of 20 25, generous support from friends like you is vital to keep Connect with Skip Heitzig strong and sharing God's unchanging truth around the11:56 world. Your year end gift helps more people hear the gospel and find lasting hope Jesus. And to thank you for your generosity, we'll send you the Daily God Journal, pastor Skip's new year long12:07 prayer journal, together with the digital devotional, the Daily God Book. These resources will guide you through scripture day by day, helping you align your heart with God and experience his peace.12:19 Request yours when you give a year end gift of 50 dollars or more at connect with skip dot com slash offer or call 809 2 2 18 88. Let's return now to today's12:31 message.12:32 So our love should be plentiful. Our love should be perceptive. There's a third quality, a third attribute of mature love, and that is our love should be pure. Also verse12:44 10, that you may approve the things that are excellent and notice the next phrase that you may be sincere and without12:56 offense until the day of Christ. You see that second that in the sentence? Begins with the word that, then there's a comma, and13:07 there's another that. I'm showing you all this because that's another purpose clause. It means in order that. All of that to say this, Paul is praying for 1 thing, 1 thing, their13:19 love, the expression of their love. I want it to abound. I want it to overflow, but within the banks of knowledge and discernment so that you can approve the things that are excellent. And13:31 so that it's all about the same subject. This is a purpose clause. So that or in order that you will express your love in the right way, in a pure way. Look at13:43 the word sincere. You know what that is. When we say a person is sincere, usually we're paying them a compliment. To us, for some reason, sincerity is like the highest13:55 virtue a person can have. Doesn't matter what they believe in, as long as they're sincere. That's what a lot of people say. The word sincere in English comes from a Latin word,14:07 actually 2 words, that sound very much like our word sincere. I'll say it. 2 Latin words. That's where14:19 we get the word sincere. Literally means without wax. Sine without sera wax. Saying, I'm praying that14:31 your love would abound and be within the banks of knowledge and discernment so that you can approve the things that are excellent, and so that you may be without wax.14:43 You're going, I don't get it. Well, in ancient times, porcelain dealers and statue makers would carve their wares14:55 and sell them. And if they wanted to sell them so that the buyer would know it's real, pure, legitimate, true and true, they would say15:06 it's without wax. Here's a plate of porcelain or a statue of marble that is sine sera. It's without wax. In other words, it didn't break, and we15:18 added dust and wax and patched it back up. It's a pure work through and through. Now, you could tell if it was with wax. You would just hold it up to the sun.15:31 It'd be sun tested. You'd hold it up, and you could see the crack running through it. And you'd feel the wax mixed with the porcelain or marble dust. And you'd say, this is a fake. This thing's busted. They patched it15:43 up. And if you bought a statue for your husband's birthday, and it's July, and you have it in the backyard, and you have a garden party, and you're all happy, everything's good until the nose falls off,15:55 and the arm falls off. And then he says, that is an in sincere expression of love that has wax in it. That's the idea of sincere. So the16:07 idea means pure, that you may be sincere and without offense. So the idea is this. Don't let your love be phony. Don't let it be16:18 mixed. Don't let it have an impure motive. Like a little boy, his mom said, you've been a bad boy lately. You need to get on your knees and pray that God would make you a16:30 better boy. He got right down on his knees, bowed his head, and he goes, oh, Lord, make me a better boy. And Lord, if you can't make me better, don't worry because I'm having a real good time just the way I am. Amen.16:45 Sometimes our life, sometimes our love, sometimes our prayers can be insincere. There's wax inside. Romans twelve:nine16:56 says, Let love be without hypocrisy. That is, don't just pretend to love, really love. Best example of insincere17:08 love is Judas Iscariot. Betrays Jesus for 30 pieces of silver and betrays him with a what? A kiss, an expression of love. Walks up to him in the garden master, goes over17:20 to him and kisses him. Jesus even remarked and says, you betrayed the son of man with a kiss? That was insincere, impure love.17:33 So let's personalize it. Let's say you give a compliment to somebody, a word of encouragement. What could be better? Well, did you really mean what you said? Or are you saying that because17:45 you want something from that person? Now it's impure. Now it's insincere. When you go up and hug a person, is it because you're genuinely showing brotherly love,17:57 or you want to get physically close to that person? That's an insincere expression of love. Matthew Henry said hypocrisy is to do the devil's work in God's uniform.18:10 So he says, I'm praying for your love, that it keep on growing and overflowing, but not in a destructive way, but within the banks of knowledge and discernment so that18:22 you can test it and approve that it's according to God's will and word, and so that it's the real deal. It is sincere, without wax. And notice what else without18:34 offense until the day of Christ. In other words, the best testimony is a life that is a18:46 genuine, authentic Christian life without hypocrisy. When you have a hypocrite showing impure love, it brings the offense factor front and center. It turns everybody18:57 off. So it would be sincere and without offense till the day of Christ. So let's sum it up. Our love should be plentiful. Our love should be perceptive. Our love should be pure.19:10 There's a fourth mark, and we'll close with this and with this last verse. Verse 11, our love should be purposeful. You say, well, sounds purposeful so far.19:22 Why do you need another purpose? Because Paul always has a higher purpose, and I want you to see what it is. Verse 11, being filled with the fruits of righteousness, which are by Jesus Christ to19:34 the glory and praise of God. What does all that mean? It simply means this is the kind of love that is the fruit of righteousness by19:45 which God is glorified. That's all it means. So when our love abounds, but it's kept within the banks of knowledge and discernment, it's a pure love. God is glorified.19:58 And that is, by the way, the purpose of all love. The purpose of marital love or boyfriend girlfriend love or friendship love isn't just so you feel better. The purpose of all love as a Christian is to glorify God. You20:09 know how I know that? Because that's the purpose of all life. All of life is to glorify God. I exist to glorify God. I do. In Revelation20:21 chapter 4, the 24 elders bowed down saying, for thy pleasure all things were created. That's why I exist. 1 Corinthians chapter 10, Whether20:33 you eat or drink or whatever you do, do all for the glory of God. Last time I checked, love is under the category of all. Whatever20:45 you do, all things for the glory of God. Loving is under the category of all things. Whatever you do, do all for the glory of God. So now20:57 we have the ultimate test to know if this expression of our love is approved or not. And it's simple. Does it glorify Jesus Christ? If it21:09 does, then everyone around us is going to be loved, and we're going to stick out like a sore thumb in this world. We're going to be like that early church that the spy came in and said, my, how they21:21 love him, and my, how they love 1 another. Because people just don't do that. But when we do it with the responsible kind of mature love, people feel21:33 loved around us, cared for, invested in, secure, and God gets the glory. So to sum it all up, our love should be21:45 growing, our love should be knowing, and our love should be showing. You ever pray for love? Oh, yeah, I pray that people love me all the21:57 time. No, I mean, do you pray for your own love for them? That's what Paul said. I'm praying for your love for 1 another. Do you ever pray22:08 that your love would flow out because people around you would be soaked, wonderfully soaked? They get around you go, man, I'm all wet. I'm soaked. That guy loves so much. She loves so22:20 much. And it's such a pure, godly love. I feel so cared for. My challenge then, as we close this week, is that you be a person this week, you start22:32 praying for your love, the expressions of your love to be mature, like what we just prayed for. I'm praying that for you this week. I mean, that's my commitment as I pray for you this week. And22:44 I'll pray for myself this kind of prayer. And here's why we need to pray for it. Here's why Paul prays for it. Because I just want to bring this up. Because sometimes people why did he pray for that? Of all the things to22:55 pray for, why that? Well, you know, in the physical world, we have a law called the second law of thermodynamics. And the second law of thermodynamics basically23:07 states that all matter and all energy in the universe is subject to and in a constant state of entropy. That is continual degradation, ongoing23:19 deterioration, decay. In the spiritual life, it's like there is a form of spiritual entropy that pulls us23:30 backwards. So as we go through the day and through the week, we get pulled back to the values of this world, the ideologies of this world expressed in23:42 their music, their news articles, their messaging along the freeway, our friends. We get pulled back to The only way to counteract that spiritual23:54 entropy is to be infusing ourself with new energy. And so we get together a lot. And that's why the book of Hebrews says, fellowship, come to church24:06 a lot, especially as you see the day of Christ approaching. Do it more often. Pray more often. Bible study more often. You need to counteract the spiritual24:18 entropy. So I'm praying for you. But I'm not praying for you like Jaron Lowenstein said, wherever you are in your car, I'm praying for24:30 you, crash. I'm praying for the long haul that your love, your expression toward 1 another would be this kind of mature love as expressed in these 424:42 ways.24:42 We're so glad you joined us today on Connect with Skip Heitzig. And remember, before you go, your generosity today makes a real difference. As this year ends, your gift24:54 of 50 dollars or more helps more people hear God's word and find lasting hope in Jesus. And to thank you, we'll send you the daily God journal along with the companion digital devotional, the daily25:06 God book. These resources will help you start the new year aligned with God's heart and growing in faith each day. Give your year end gift now at connect with Skip dot com slash offer25:18 or call 809 2 2 18 88. Come back next time for more verse by verse teaching of God's word here on Connect with Skip Heitzig.25:49 Connect with Skip Heitzig is a presentation of Connection Communications, connecting you to God's never changing truth in ever changing times.
Comments No comments yet. Start the conversation.
Comments
Keep it kind. Comments are public.